


Promises

by HitokoSama



Series: Strength of Words [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Romance, Yaoi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-20
Updated: 2017-09-29
Packaged: 2018-02-18 02:15:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 54,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2331485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HitokoSama/pseuds/HitokoSama
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On summer's night, seven years ago, Sasuke and Naruto made a promise; a promise that if they were still single at 25, they would get married. On the eve on Naruto's 25th year, Sasuke returns with the full intent of claiming his prize but the blond has forgotten all about the promise. And even seems wary of Sasuke's sudden advances. Can Sasuke make Naruto stick to his word?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: There are some things in this chapter which reference religion and a literary look at the Bible. Please do not take them seriously. I’m just a twenty year-old woman who will tell you straight up that I’m too young to really know anything about anything. It is JUST an objective look at what has been written across religions. If you like what you read though, do more research about it or ask me for sources. Thank you for understanding.

The literary department was dead, a calm settling through the walls. There was no flip-flopping of my fellow graduate students, all hurrying to make big paper deadlines. There was no hurried steps of professors with huge stacks of papers to grade. Midterms were finally over. For another three weeks it would be silenced and peaceful in the building.

I walked to my office, morning coffee in hand. During midterm week, everyone was always in a panic. And I always had to be vigilant so no one would spill my coffee via slamming into me, practically a stress zombie. It was like a frenzy, no apologies, no nothing. But now, everyone was elated. Suffering and cramming phonebook sized papers into office slots were a thing of the past.

I sat down at my desk, placing my coffee on the small coaster in the corner of my workspace. The rest of it was filled with books, knick-knacks, graded papers students hadn’t bothered to pick up. I sighed, contemplating pulling my laptop out of my bag. I needed to get some work done for my lesson plan…But I couldn’t focus.

There was something nagging me at the back of my mind. A little red flag but I couldn’t quite figure out what it really meant. I had made sure, three different times that I had turned in everything for my graduate classes. My portfolios were good, stylized, edited, and there was nothing left for me to do.

But it was just there. A feeling that I was forgetting something.

Who knows, though?

I glanced up at my door when I heard soft thudding against the wood. “Come on in.” Sai, my roommate, came waltzing in. He was wearing that annoying black half-shirt and dark jean combo that drove me nuts. Considering he was also so supposed to have an air of sophistication to him, this outfit never ever said graduate student. It was even more unnerving since we lived in the misty, cold northwest where the sky could open up a torrent at any second.

He waved, wiggling all of his fingers as he entered my office. His short raven hair looked wet, as though he rushed over from our apartment to be here. I raised an eyebrow. “Braving the depths of Padelford, are we?” He stopped short, right in front of my desk. I hadn’t sat down quite yet. I blinked a few times. “Did you forget how to get to Guthrie hall or something?”

Sai was smiling at me, dark, onyx eyes peering at me through equally dark lashes, not hiding a hint of amusement in them. He slapped something down onto my desk and I felt a jolt of panic rising up through my blood. I held the small stack of papers in my hands, shaking with the sheer stupidity only I could possess. “A certain someone forgot their Associate Professor application this morning. Rejoice that I, Sai, your loving roommate have such great foresight.”

“I could kiss you, you know that?” I said, looking over the pages in my hand. I stood up from my desk. I needed to deliver this right away. Today was the last day for applications and if forgot this, well, my life would effectively be over.

Sai stepped in front of my, grabbing onto my wrist, to pull me closer to him. I scoffed. “If you insist.”

I sidestepped him, smiling at him. “Save it for our honeymoon.”

“You mean the one we’re not having?”

“Exactly!”

I half-jogged, half-walked to Kakashi’s office. He was the current head of the literature department. And he would be the one who decide my fate. Being an Associate Professor would allow me to stay here after Graduate school for at least another year or two. Then my life would be mine. I could transfer out of this school, I could attempt to be a full time professor with actual tenure and everything. It would be glorious.   

But of course, Kakashi could very well deny me and I would have to find a job. I did not want to be a copy-write guy. Eight hours a day writing up legal mumbo-jumbo, my wrist would physically fall off and I would no longer be able to do anything with my entire life, Sai would kick me out, and I’d be forced to move back in with Iruka, probably start teaching High school and cry myself to sleep every night. I shivered. I shouldn’t work myself up like that.

“Thinking about teaching High School again?” Sai was keeping pace beside me, awfully persistent today. I nodded; he knew me pretty well by now. We had been living together since we were undergraduates. And looking back, that seemed like forever ago. He was smiling again, something I was never completely okay with. His smiles were like…I didn’t know how to explain them. On the surface, they seemed polite, correct, but when you looked past them, into his eyes, you knew there was nothing there to support it.

“Why are you even here? Besides to brighten my day, of course.” I spat, sarcasm dripping from words even though I smiled at him. Sai smirked.

“Classes for me don’t start until eleven.” Sai said as I stopped, slipping my application into the wrack on Kakashi’s door. “And my office hours aren’t until one so I have time to kill. Besides, I remember a certain someone who needed a certain application…”

I paused, looking at him and then looking down at the watch on my wrist. “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME IT WAS ALMOST TEN THIRTY!? I HAVE CLASS IN FIVE MINUTES!”

“Well, maybe you shouldn’t sleep in so late, so you’ll actually know what time it is when you get to your office.” Sai offered, smiling.

I shoved him out of my way, running back to my office to grab my bag.

WHY DID MY CLASSROOM HAVE TO BE HALFWAY ACROSS CAMPUS?!

I shuffled in, nearly late. My students were all chatting, sitting around in their friend groups, some were quiet, sleep-ridden. Some looked like they were about to fall over with exhaustion. You’d think after so many years at college, you’d get used to the stress crunch, but it effects everyone differently; like me, I do best under pressure. Maybe one day my students will find the way to stave off the constant stress of the quarter. 

I pulled out a small container of chalk from my bag; still secretly hating who decided to give me one of the older rooms without a projector. It wasn’t that big of a hassle, really, but sometimes my handwriting was a little on the god-awful side. I cleared my throat causing a lull to spread throughout the room. Everyone turned towards me, some smiling, some looking utterly bored, some secretly texting beneath their tables. Can’t win ‘em all, I guess.

“Good morning everyone.” I said, smiling to them. They muttered replies back. Sometimes I wondered if I should stick with teaching later in the day classes so everyone was more lively but ten thirty really wasn’t that early…I thought.

“Today, we’re going to be larger picturing the Bible. Since this is a Bible as literature class, we have to be objective in our interpretations of passages, characters, and symbolism.” I said, writing down ‘archetypes’ on the board with the chalk. I’d learned by now that if you press lightly enough, it wouldn't squeak but would still be dark enough. Nothing like learning how to write in chalk…

“And I know what you’re all thinking, ‘Naruto, this is the exact same thing you said on the first day of class.’ And well, you’re right. I did say that. However, it seems like people enjoy checking out part-way through the quarter and blatantly ignoring everything I said in the first two weeks of class about objectivism. I only say it to remind you.”

I turned towards the class, watching as their faces stared back at me, bored.  I always felt a little irked when I never got a reaction out of them. But, whatever, they had post-midterm brain. “So, while we’ve examined small territory within the Bible; the stories, parables and the like, we still have yet to cover major ground...”

Everyone pulled out their notebooks, flipping pages and clicking pencils and pens in an out of sync rhythm. “Now, small disclaimer. I know, another one after the one I just gave. Sorry, it is necessary. This is a literature class, which means we have to look at themes in other works, compare them, and then see the inherent operation of such tools as a whole. That brings me to part two of the disclaimer; if any of you come up to me after class to yell at me about what I say during this lecture, I will say to you what I say every quarter to every single butt-hurt undergraduate. This class,” I paused, pointing around the room. “Is not a bible studies class. My _job_ is to tear apart literary symbolism and themes to show you how meaning is circumscribed inside sentences. If this lecture offends you because it attempts to broaden your thinking, perhaps instead of getting mad, you should interrogate your belief system and reaffirm connections for yourself. Get it? Everyone clear? Good. Shall we begin then?”

I never give them enough time to answer anymore. Gotta keep them off their game so no one tries to interject with something that directly violates everything I usually say in my disclaimer. I shouldn’t even need one; we’re all in a University setting. But, it didn’t matter. People believed what they wished and when challenged get defensive…Same story, time and time again.

“First, context. As always we need context to further understand theme. Where would we be without our almighty context to guide us?” I said with a smile. I turned my back to the classroom, hearing the opening and click of the door. Whoever it was only a few minutes late so I guess for now I wouldn’t chastise them. I didn’t even acknowledge them by turning around. I really don't want to get branded with the stamp of the mean teacher this early in my career.

I stared to draw a huge circle in the middle of the board, cutting two lines through the top to the bottom and again going right to left. Inside the four divisions, I cut them even smaller until there were twelve sections. I pulled my hand back, moving out of the way so that everyone could fully see what I had drawn. “Can anyone name what I’m drawing in this incompletely state?”

“It’s the pictorial representation chart of the constellations, seasons, and the equinoxes.” A girl in the front said.

“Right. And just to save time and your eyes, I won’t draw in the symbols for the constellations, just names.” I put down the chalk. “Now a lot of what we know about the not-so long ago, long ago is that they were avid watchers of the sky. How do we know this?” I pointed up to the board, to my crude circle. “We have plenty of evidence which suggests a fair amount of cultures had an intense interest in the sky; the sun in particular. They understood the implications of the sun itself, meaning, that they understood when the sun went down it would be cooler, it would be darker, and it would be typically more dangerous. And that, my dear students, gives us one of the most common literary themes in the history of books. Does anyone know which one?”

Silence was usually golden but…

Better just continue.

I picked up the chalk again, passing it between my hands. “Oh, sorry time has run out. Good versus evil is the theme I was thinking of. Now, I know what you’re thinking. ‘But Naruto, good and evil are always characters in some way, not just the day and the night. The setting is usually for context and atmosphere’ and wow, great observation, but that’s not exactly true, is it? Evil and good can be presented as just the day and the night. And if they sometimes when they are, they are juxtaposed to convey a theme; never just thrown on a page without care mind you. But as it were, even in a symbolic form, the day and night alone don’t pack as much punch as a character we can outright identify as evil or good. Protagonist, antagonist. However, that leaves us with the question of…Well, if the sun isn’t a character and just a symbol how do we know the sun has characteristics that can be shared in the first place?”    

My fingers were already powdered white from the dust clinging to them as I turned to write. I wrote ‘personification’ on the board. “When we attribute human like qualities to objects, we personify them. We make them human in nature. It is also how we can explain objects; like the sun. If we give human characteristics to something like the sun, it makes the super-human characteristics otherworldly BUT plausible. And then, we can reapply them to character it allows them to seem larger than themselves because they share these traits with, well, things larger than ourselves. And that my lovely students, is the origins of Gods, in literary context.”

Underneath what I had written earlier, I added ‘virgin mother, December twenty-fifth, twelve followers, crucifixion, and resurrection.’ “Even if you have a very limited understanding of the Bible, these themes should spell out one person and that person would be…Obviously…Jesus.” I wrote that name on the board. “But of course, there’s a reason I’ve put all of these characteristics underneath the ‘archetype’ category. Because I can name at least five god-like figures who share similar, if not EXACT traits with Jesus and they all pre-date him.”   

The room was silent, taking in the information, formulating it in the notebooks as they scribbled furiously. “Krishna, Dionysus, Romulus, Buddha, and Horas; just some I can think of on the top of my head. While not all of them will share exact stories, there are things that each possess that Jesus also possesses. But why is that important? Can anything answer me that?”

Ever silent, as always, I shook my head. “Kind of important…Kind of an important aspect of literature…Kind of why books across countries work…” I muttered. I let out a long sigh. I turned back to the board, about to circle the word ‘archetype’ which I had written as the lecture title.

“Jesus is an archetype,” my fingers shook with the sudden voice. “He shares numerous characteristics with other, major religious figures. He is a character, rehashed and given a new face with every religion. In that way, he is far more relatable than something sharing no characteristics with the deities of that region. In a pessimistic sort of thinking, it makes Christianity’s spread across cultures intrinsically simple.”

I was stunned, turning so that I could face the class. There was no way. That voice wasn’t…

And that’s when I saw him, sitting in the back of the room. He was staring back at me and I felt my heart thudding in my chest. Why was he here?

How did I not notice him before?

“Well, yes. Though, not exactly what I was looking for I do appreciate your bravery…Sasuke.” I turned away from him, feeling suddenly awkward. I think everyone was starting to notice too because they all seemed very interested in Sasuke. They obviously knew he isn’t a regular student. “What I was trying to get at is that while the stories are ‘rehashed’ as you so assert, their themes connect them to cultural beliefs; usually shared ones.  That, in turn, makes the stories more universally available. Across cultures, the characteristics are familiar; they give a certain meaning to the stories, no matter the region. But, this meaning itself is not some mystery, since Jesus shares these characteristics, his teachings and stories make sense to the people that are introduced to them. So, agreeably, yes, Christianity can spread more easily across cultures. Not my main point though…”

I looked around the room. Why did I feel such a strong tension between myself and Sasuke all of a sudden? I just noticed he was here! I bit the inside of my cheek. Everyone was still taking small glances at him; girls in the front row were giggling. I slammed my hand down by them so they would quiet down. “Any questions before we move on?”

A hand went up in the back, about four or five seats away from Sasuke. Whoever it was must have either been really short, or they were ducking their head down. “So, like…” Oh God, please spare me. “Is this the Sasuke you were with in High School? I’m texting Gaara and I need the details.” Sai’s head popped up from behind the student he was sitting behind.

“Sai, what are you doing in here? Get out.” I felt a push of anger in my blood as I glared at him. He was lucky there were four rows of tables separating us otherwise I would have been all over him. And I pack quite a punch.  

“This is your Jesus lecture. It’s my favorite. I’m always here for Jesus day.” Sai kicked back in his seat. “You gunna answer my question?”

I briefly looked at the clock. “Alright, everyone, early day. If you have questions email me, otherwise have a nice day.”

Sasuke was smirking the entire time. My eyes were fixed on him, fixed on that face. It was just as I remembered it. Strongly structured, aristocratic nose, pale as the day he was born, lips cherry red with life…Framed with raven feathers that always seemed to sparkle with an odd blue tint. I felt heat in my face as he sat there, watching my students leave.

Sai was still there too, much to my dismay. I frowned. “Sai, out. Now.”  

“I brought you coffee.” Sai said in a sing-song voice, shaking the ice drink from the back of the room. “I bet you my entire paintbrush collection that this morning you forgot your coffee on your desk. You were in quite a hurry.” I slunk towards him, grabbing the coffee from his hand, mumbling my thanks under my breath. I drank the entire cup in record time.

“Okay, now get out.” Sai just patted me on the cheek. He was lucky I didn’t bite him. “Sai, don’t you have class to attend to? I thought you said it started at eleven?”

He smiled at me; an almost all-too-knowing smile. “Naruto, it’s Thursday. I teach on Mondays and Fridays. If I had let you know the truth about my classes, you would have definitely thrown your box of chalk at me when I walked in.” He tricked me this morning; that bastard. He was _oh_ so smart. I rolled my eyes. “But aside from that, I feel as though you’re being quite rude, Naruto. You haven’t introduced Sasuke and I.”

Sasuke was sitting there in his seat still; I felt the heat in my cheeks as I glanced over my shoulder at him. He’d been silent the entire time, enjoying my little scene with Sai. Of course, Sasuke loved this kind of thing; he always said I was the cutest when I was flustered.

I rubbed the back of my neck sheepishly; my smile was probably too wide and too nervous looking to be normal. I sighed. “Sasuke, this is my roommate and socially inept friend, Sai. Sai, this is Sasuke.”

Sai waved; the annoying wave I really hate where he looks like he’s clawing the air, like an idiot. Sasuke just smirked, eyes cast away from Sai. Yep, typical Sai and Sasuke. And I surrounded myself with people like this. I must be as stupid as everyone said.  

Sasuke stood up suddenly, putting a hand on my shoulder. His thumb rubbed circles gently into the muscle. His mouth opened, parting his lip slightly as he leaned closer to the two of us. “As nice as it was to meet you, Sai, I’m here on Dobe related business.”

I immediately turned, his hand pulling back from shoulder as our arms wrapped around each other. His body felt just like I remembered; taut with muscle, hard, yet inviting against mine. Against my better judgment, I nuzzled against his neck, bringing a chuckle to his lips. I could hear Sai let out a gasp of excitement as well, but I decided to ignore it.

I pulled back as he leaned in, kissing me gently on the lips. Just a peck, just a small touch, but I nearly shivered. Greeting or not, it was pleasantly unexpected. I flushed nervously, smiling. Time to ignore the awkwardness. I held onto his upper forearms, looking closer at his face. God, he changed. Well, he had grown some, still towering over my short ass, which was to be expected. But his face was more mature, thinner and more angular; the baby fat of our youth finally melted away. But those eyes, they were just as dark, just as deep, just as expressive…

I started to laugh, hugging him against me again. “God, man…I can’t believe you’re here.” I moved my arms up to his face, catching it between my palms. “You look great, Sasuke.” I was smiling.

“Can’t say the same for you, Dobe.”

 I wasn’t smiling anymore.                                      

I gawked at Sasuke, my jaw slackening with shock. Sai was just sitting behind us, laughing, evilly. Well, to be fair I did let my guard down. Sasuke was quite good at seeing openings and taking them. I gritted my teeth as Sasuke patted me on the head, rubbing my hair in the way he knew I hated.

“Well,” I said with a sullen tone. “At least Sakura will be happy you’re here.”

“I’ve just met him and I’m happy he’s here.” Sai snipped, taking a jab at me. At this rate they’ll have to change the expression to ‘kill two ravens with one stone’ because that’s what I was going to do.

Sasuke leaned against the table. “Don’t pout, Dobe.”

“So, why are you here anyway? It’s been awhile since you were in back in Seattle.”

He smirked at me, poking me in the nose. “As I do recall, a certain blond Dobe has a birthday on Saturday.” My stomach felt like it was in a knot.

I crossed my arms, raising an eyebrow at him, leaning so I could look him fully in the face. “Teme, we both know you didn’t come back just for my birthday.”

“Believe what you will, then.” Sasuke said with a shrug. “But, I will also be a graduate student here as well, from tomorrow onward.”  

Sai and I probably had the same face when he said that. It was incredibly rare to get new graduate students this late in the quarter, hell, this late into their academic career. At the beginning, sure. People transferred colleges all the time. But this was just strange. Sasuke must have had some very extenuating circumstances to lead him here.

“Did something happen at your college? Did you kill someone?” I eyed him suspiciously.

Sasuke scoffed. “Oh yes, because coming back to Seattle after murdering someone would be the best move.” He shook his head, looking almost too amused.

“Ted Bundy did go to this university.” Sai added suddenly. “God bless the Northwest.”

“Don’t mind Sai, he’s a psych major.” I replied. Sasuke rolled his eyes, seeming a little impatient.

“Psych and art major.” Sai corrected, holding up a single finger, shaking it at me. “I’m going to be an art therapist.”

“Nobel,” Sasuke commented, hands on his hips.

“What about you, Sasuke? I doubt you’re an English major like good ol’ dick-less.”

“Dick-less?” Sasuke asked, giving me his full attention. A smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

“Don’t you even start with me, Teme.”

“I’m an engineer.” Sasuke replied, seeming to pick up on my mood. Though I knew later, he would mock me about this. He had a keen mind for everything. “And as for the earlier question, I was having quite a deal of trouble with my lead professor, Orochimaru. He was not at all professional in his conduct and I grew quite tired of his actions, so much so that I decided I couldn’t stay out on the East coast. This may not have been my first choice, being that it is only be a second-tier research university, but it’ll do. Itachi is a very big figure in the physics department and I knew he’d give me a good word. But as chance would have it, they needed physics teaching assistance due to one dropping out in the middle of the quarter. They gave me a stipend to move back here as soon as I could. I flew in last night.”

“Sounds like you lucked out.” I mused while nibbling the inside of my lip.  

“Yes and I was quite glad for it.” Sasuke relaxed his stance. “Otherwise, I would have been lucky to get in after winter, at the earliest. And I didn’t know if I could handle Orochimaru for another quarter…” Sasuke’s brow twitched, showing the annoyance on his face. Sasuke really must have hated him a lot to just drop everything and suddenly transfer.

“So, what are you teaching? I doubt it’s something upper division.” I inquired, shifting my weight to my other foot. “If they were desperate for a TA, it must have been for something that had quite a large class size.”

“Yeah, well, they want to test me out too, you know?” Sasuke seemed even more annoyed about that as he sighed quite loudly. “They said a great deal of my course evaluation weren’t counted as valid because most of them always mentioned something about how I looked. For now, I’m teaching physics one-twenty-one.”

I huffed, jealousy hitting my blood. Why did he get nice course evaluations? I bet I could teach circles around him. “Your course evaluations must be slightly better than mine, right? I’ve gotten so many ‘you’re going to hell’ comments teaching this class that Sai and I pin the funniest ones of the fridge.”

“Good times.” Sai said, smiling.

“For what it’s worth, from what I saw today, you’re quite engaging in your lectures. I quite enjoyed it.” Sasuke was smirking at me, patting me on the arm. It was strangely kind gesture from him. He wasn’t known for his compliments, especially about my intelligence. “Though, if you want to see what real teaching looks like, you might want to stop by Kane one-thirty around noon tomorrow.”

“You really haven’t changed at all, have you?” I nearly yelled, feeling anger surging up my back. Sai was laughing again.

There was a knock at the door behind us, a man, around our age poking his head in. He looked a little nervous. “Are you guys finished yet? My class starts soon.”

I nodded, walking back up to the board, clearing off the chalk and picking up my things. Sasuke and Sai both waited for me as we mumbled our apologies and left. We walked out into the hall, the creakiness of the floorboards in Parrington always made me slightly nervous. It always seemed like they might just crack and break at any moment. I really hoped it wasn’t me who landed in that situation. 

It was surreal, walking next to Sasuke as we descended down the stairs. I would have never thought he’d step a single foot back in Seattle, especially for longer than a visit. I knew from Itachi, Sasuke didn’t come back a lot. And when he did, it was almost random, sometimes not even coinciding with a vacation period. Maybe that Orochimaru guy really got under Sasuke’s skin. He must have really needled Sasuke with his shit badly if he abandoned an Ivy League for, what the media dubbed, ‘a public ivy’.

We crossed the street, entering Red Square. I nearly tripped over a missing brick hole. Damn seniors. I would never understand this tradition. Creating pot-holes for their fellows students? Seems quite rude if you asked me. Sasuke pressed himself against my side to help me settle, Sai just chuckling under his breath. I could feel another flush heading up my neck when I felt Sasuke’s body against mine. It was there. His warmth. Even through his sweatshirt, I could just feel his body heat radiating out. 

Sasuke glanced over towards the Quad; the overcast of the sky blocking out the sun, shadowing his face even though it was late morning. “Ah, I spy an Itachi.” I looked in that direction, the black hair swinging in a loose ponytail. He was glancing down at a large book, his glasses sliding down his nose as he focus on the words in front of him. “Hey, I’m going to go catch up with him. Text me?”

“You bet, Teme.” We stopped walking and Sasuke pulled me into a strong hug. His fingers were pressing into the material of my raincoat and I could feel them clearly rubbing small circles in my back.

“It was nice to meet you, finally.” Sai said with a smile, shaking Sasuke’s hand. “I look forward to seeing you around.” Sasuke nodded, waving to us as he jogged over to Itachi. He smiled as soon as Sasuke pulled on the fabric of his jacket.

I turned towards Sai, a smile creeping up my features. It was making my mouth twitch as I tried to suppress it. He put a hand on my shoulder and from just the look on his face I could tell he was about to make our shared apartment a warzone.   
\---

Sai stood in the kitchen, snapping open a can of Red Bull. He had just come back from his shift at Starbucks and obviously being around coffee all day doesn’t equate to all day energy. I moved past him, pulling out the carton of orange juice in the fridge, taking a large swig before setting it back down. He was smiling at me; that eerie smile which told me he was about to play my least favorite game with me. ‘TELL ME EVERYTHING ABOUT WHEN YOU AND SASUKE DATED!’

He was about to open his mouth when I immediately cut him off. “Sai, no. I’ve told you for the millionth time, what happened between me and Sasuke is old news.” I said, almost glaring him down. My old love life is just that, old. And me repeating it and harping on it is not going to change what happened. Our relationship was inevitably doomed; I was tired of seeming like I was dwelling on it. Of course, his sudden reappearance was not helping. “I don’t understand why you’re so interested!”

“Better question; how could I not be?” Sai was pacing around the kitchen, barring me from leaving the shared space. “When I saw the two of you together today all I could think about was ‘Wow, I totally ship them. OTP, ten out of ten.’”

“Sai! I’m done with this. Sasuke and I broke up like _seven_ years ago.” I said waving my hands with exasperation. “He’s just here because circumstances played him this hand.”

“But he’s excited for your birthday!” Sai said, nearly leaping in the air with excitement and almost spilling his Red Bull in the process. “I bet you anything he got you his dick as a present!” 

“Shouldn’t you be less excited about this? You’re my ex-boyfriend for god’s sake!”

“I don't see how that changes anything. I want to see you happy, too, you know.” He was smiling. “And you looked very happy with him.”

I sighed. “I’m not telling you anything. You know everything you _need_ to know about our relationship.”

“How about a little competition?” Sai said with a smirk on his face. “We play a game, if you win, you don’t have to tell me anything and I’ll drop it; won’t ever ask again. If I win, well, I’m hearing all the nasty details.”

My jaw slackened with annoyance, leaning against the counter of our kitchen. I was shaking my head, rolling my eyes and thinking just how stupid it was. Though, if I did manage to win, he would finally leave it alone. Let the past stay there, dead and buried underneath the sands of time. I looked over at him, smiling and looking quite sure of himself. I sighed. “Fine. Name the game.”

Sai smiled even wider. “Only the best game known to man; Monopoly.”

I shivered, crossing my arms. “Absolutely not. I’m not sitting down for three fucking hours and playing that game with you.” I poked him in the chest. “Besides, last time you got so mad when I won, you didn’t talk to me for nearly a week. I am not dealing with that again.”

“Dick-less.” He commented just to irk me. Sai smiled still. If Sai wasn’t my roommate, I might have just murdered him. We can dream. “Though, you’re right.” He paced into the kitchen, throwing his can of Red Bull into the recycling. “Okay, how about Super Smash Bros, one round; to the victor goes the spoils.”

It was finally my turn to smirk. “Oh, you’re going fucking down.”

~ **ONE ROUND LATER~**

“GOD-FUCKING-DAMMIT!” I swore, nearly throwing my controller to the ground. “How the fuck did you do that?!”   

“Because I play Kirby and I play to win.” He commented, completely serious for a change.

I could feel myself on the brink of having a rage-seizure. I was not a very good loser, for one, and now I had to fucking tell him. I had to bring out all of Sasuke and I’s dirty laundry for him to inspect. I literally just wanted to crawl under a rock and hide for the rest of my life.

“Okay, story time. Don’t leave anything out please.” Sai put down his controller, smiling at me. He turned, throwing his legs over mine on the couch, like he wanted to trap me. I just wanted to slam his face down on the coffee table.

“Well, I don’t even know where you want me to start.” I said, shaking my head. “I mean, Sasuke and I had like a relationship-not-relationship for years.”

“Start wherever. I’ve waited for this moment for years.”

I wanted to cry with exasperation. “Fine, I’ll just start at the beginning so you won’t ask so many questions later. Sasuke and I met in middle school; we absolutely hated each other. He was an arrogant prick who had his head shoved too far up his own ass. And then there was me; awkward, lanky, short, inferiority complex. We’d get into verbal fights every day; his smug attitude bothered the shit out of me. And then one day, I noticed he was getting harassed by a group of these really annoying fourteen year-old pseudo-thugs. So, I helped him. And by help, I mean I got my ass beat. Sasuke, however, was a goddamn karate master.” A small laugh broke Sai’s silence and I glared hard at him. “He helped me up, took me back home with him, cleaned me up, and the rest was history.”  

“So, you got your ass beat, Sasuke took pity on you, and then you two became friends? Only you could make friends like that…”

“Keep up with comments like that and I will refuse to tell you anymore.”

“So threatening.”

“May I continue?” Sai made a movement with his hand as confirmation. I hated the amused look in his eye. “So then, High school. Sasuke and I were the best of friends. If I wasn’t at his house, he was at mine. We actually had a lot in common, even though, at first, it seemed like we would never get along. We did everything together. Like when I got rejected by every girl I asked to prom and Sasuke rejected everyone who asked him, we went together. And I mean, when he came out to me, a lot of his behavior made way more sense…But then he actually confessed to me and told me he’d been thinking about us as a couple for a long time. But by this point, it was already the beginning of senior year. And let me say, it was a little late, but I was still willing to give it a try. I mean, when Sasuke told me he had feelings, it just felt…Right, you know? And deep down, I knew I loved him more than just friendship. I don’t know how to explain it.”

I bit the inside of my lip. “He was my first. My first kiss, my first relationship, my first lover. Just everything.”

“How was the sex?”

“And how exactly did I know you were going to turn this mushy-gushing admittance into my sex-capade?”

“You are talking to me, after all.” Sai replied and I rolled my eyes. "Besides, it wouldn't be a good romantic story if you didn't talk about sex.”

“I don’t know…? Fucking amazing? Best sex I’ve had?”

“That hurts my feelings.” He said, pinching me on the leg.

I smirked at him.  "Oh, but I thought you wanted to hear about it?"

"Don't you patronize me." Sai pouted, arms crossed.

“Anyway, our relationship was literally what everyone talked about. I mean it, everyone. Even the teachers talked about it. Everyone had apparently paired us together for like, ever, I guess. But that’s when college happened. Sasuke was a genius; absolutely brilliant. Me, eh, I’m a community college before university kind of dude. And I knew…I knew we wouldn’t make it past that. He and I both were aware, deep down, we wouldn’t end up in the same college and even against his protests; I told him we should break up before we went off to college. He was going to the other side of the country and the long distance would have killed me. I mean, I was used to seeing him every day, all day…” I felt a little pang in my chest. I remembered sobbing so hard telling this to Sasuke and he just held me in his arm, petting my hair and kissing me. It was probably the hardest decision I had ever made.

“The summer before he left, it was filled with warm, sunny days together and longing. I didn’t want him to go and I could tell he didn’t want to leave, but he was getting a full ride and he couldn’t pass it up. The night before he left, we got absolutely smashed, knowing it would numb the hurt. That night…” We laid on Sasuke’s floor the entire night, pushing bottles away as we explored each other; need for touch outweighing our other senses. “Was filled with alcohol-soaked kisses, gentle words, and just…Feelings.”

Sai wasn’t smiling anymore, he wasn’t smirking. He was just sitting there, his features actually displaying the hurt I had felt on my loneliest nights without Sasuke. I laughed a little. “We kept in touch, naturally. But I had been right about the distance. He only came back to town for holiday, but even then it was few and infrequent, and the best way for me to keep up with him was email. If we had tried to keep it going, I would have been more than miserable.”

I looked at Sai and his featured were soft with sadness. “God, I think I need a shot of tequila just to numb the feelings I have about that story.” He muttered, shaking his head. “But I mean, he’s back now right? I think he’s interested.”

I raised my eyebrow at Sai’s comment. “I don’t think so dude. I mean I still consider him my best friend. We text. He calls me when he’s not busy at college. We email each other a lot. Sakura says she even gets emails from him sometimes, so it’s not like I’m getting special attention.” I sighed, reclining my head back. “Besides, if he was interested in me still, wouldn’t he have tried to, I don’t know, transfer here when his undergraduate was over?”

Sai was shaking his head.

“I think you’re reading too far into the situation.” I added quickly.

“How long has it been since you’ve seen him in person?” Sai asked.

“Uhh…” I bit the inside of my cheek, running a hand through my hair. “My twenty-first birthday. But even that took some doing. I begged him for nearly a year to come and when he did show up, it was totally unexpected. Great surprise, though.”

“Did you hook-up?” Sai leaned towards me, smirking.

I rolled my eyes. “Hate to disappoint, but we did not. I mean, that was right before I started dating Gaara. I was trying to find someone else than Sasuke, you know. He lived an airplane away.”

Sai smirked again. “Obviously that didn’t work.”

“Obviously.” I mimicked. “But if I had kept dating Gaara, we wouldn’t have hooked-up.”

He leaned in farther, his nose brushing past mine as our lips touched. Typical Sai. His fingers traced my thighs and I held back a shiver. We hadn’t hooked-up in a while either. I tried to keep the sex I had with Sai to a minimum, especially after we broke up, but even I needed a release every once in a while. I let him pull me into his lap, fingers pressing into the back of my neck. “I thought you shipped Sasuke and I?” I mocked. His lips stuck to my neck, sucking gently.

He pulled back. “I do. Call me Sasuke when we do it, okay?” He was smiling again and I didn’t hold back. Right in the side of his jaw, I punched him as hard as I could. His head jerked to the side, nearly throwing me off of him. “Too far?” He muttered, rubbing the side of his mouth.

I detangled myself from his mess of limbs and he clicked his tongue, disappointed, yet oddly amused. “You always take it too far.”

“Tell me, have you ever told Sasuke about us? Or about Gaara?” Sai asked, still nursing his hurt jaw. I stood up, heading towards the kitchen. Sai moved to the arm of the couch, laying over it as I opened the freezer, pulling out a tray of ice. I gave a few good, cracking twists.

“Kind of.” I said, wetting a washcloth and shoving a fist full of ice into it. “I told him that I had been hooking-up sometimes because we got on that topic one night. And I never said who so if you’re suddenly worried about Sasuke wanting to kill you because you think he’s still got a thing for me, you can rest assured that your true identity is safe with me.” I placed the make-shift icepack into Sai’s hand as he laid back on the couch, pressing it gently against his cheek.

“I wonder, then…”   



	2. chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ah, yes, Sai's evil plan revealed while we learn about that thing Issac Newton talked about once.

 

“Naruto!” I awoke with a start as Sai literally jumped up and down on my bed, far too close to my face to be comfortable. “Naruto, wake up!”

“Oh my God…” I muttered, pulling up my blanket farther, creating a thread shield between myself and the horrid roommate I had chosen.

“Dick-less!” He cried, suddenly forcing all of his weight on top of me, squishing me beneath his larger body. And by larger I really just meant taller. He was less muscled than me, so, of course, he weighed practically nothing. Still didn’t mean I didn’t become very well acquainted with my mattress as he laid on top of me. “Please get up, I need you!” Against my better judgment, I pulled the blanket down. He kissed me gently on the nose, straddling my side, effectively pinning my body down against my bed. “Okay so I have class today and I need you to record Sasuke’s lecture.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I pushed him off of me, sitting up and scowling at him. I turned my head to the clock. If memory served me correctly, Sasuke said his lecture would be at noon. When the clock showed it was barely past nine, I slowly turned my head towards Sai, who was still excitedly bouncing on my bed. “Really, are you fucking with me?”

“If you get up now, you’ll have plenty of time to be bright eyed for Sasuke!” Sai slammed his weight down on me again. “I bet he’d love to see you sitting in the first row of his lecture hall, camera recording him for my reference.”

“Are you going to start stalking Sasuke, Sai?” Because I didn’t at all doubt that Sasuke had only gotten stronger over the years and he wouldn’t be afraid of performing a Mortal Kombat fatality on Sai. Now that I think about it, I’m actually okay with that. “You know what, go ahead and do that.”

“I’m not stalking him.” Sai said with a reassuring tone, but there was too much mischief in that smile. “I’m just ritualistically obsessing over him because he is an important half of my newest OTP.”

“If you don’t get out of my room, I will throw you into Drumheller. It’s very stagnant with duck shit this time of year.”

“You’re  _so_ not a morning person.”

“YOU WOKE ME UP LIKE A SMALL, DEMONIC CHILD DEMANDING I RECORD A LECTURE WHICH IS THREE HOURS FROM NOW!” I accused, very loudly. It is true though, I’m not at all a morning person and Sai was being quite insufferable this fine morning. “NOT TO MENTION, IT’S MY DAY OFF AND I WANTED TO SLEEP IN!” 

Sai smiled at me, pinching my cheek. “My sweet, sweet dick-less.” He was mocking me again and I planned on making good on my threat about Drumheller. “Will me blowing you help?”

I felt something inside my soul snap as I chased Sai out of my room. “AND STAY OUT!” I slammed the door behind me, flopping back down on my bed. I closed my eyes but then quickly sprung them open when I realized, much to my own horror, that I was no longer tired.

Sai was going to be covered in so much duck shit that he wouldn’t be able to find enough soap to clean himself.  
\--

Why was I even here?

I mostly wanted to blame Sai but I knew I couldn’t place the full blame upon him. I had walked all the way off the Ave and onto campus, after all.

I shuffled around the awkwardly bunched students around the podium of the stage, making my way to the back of Kane hall. I settled myself in the furthest row from the stage as I possibly could, sighing at my own stupidity. To be frank, I had be a little curious when Sasuke said he would be teaching today. I did actually wonder if Sasuke could shed his shell of ice to be approachable enough to teach the material. I’ve noticed that some TAs, even in the most basic of classes, were far too arrogant to even begin to teach a class properly. Somehow, I doubted Sasuke was a case like that, but I guess if he royally fucked it up I could indulge in the greatest of pleasures by rubbing his nose in it.

I sighed, again, making a mental note that I needed to stop doing that. Sasuke hadn’t even been back for two days and I was already sighing fifty times more than normal...

I mental assessed my own thoughts, twitching at the realization. Sasuke really had nothing to do with why I was sighing so much. Why was I blaming him for it?

This is because Sai woke me up too early. I nodded to myself.

After shifting around in the ridiculously uncomfortable chair of this lecture hall, I folded my arms across my chest, waiting for the class to officially begin. The chair squeaked loudly as I leaned back; I made a displeased sound in the back of my throat when two students turned around to glare at me. Wasn’t my fault they decided to sit in front of me. They were lucky I didn’t put my feet up on their chairs just to spite them.

“Naruto?” I turned my head at the familiar voice and noticed Itachi walking towards me, smiling good-naturedly. His black hair swung gently behind him as he took the seat next to me. He leaned closer and we embraced. I had gotten to know Itachi very well during the long years of Sasuke and I’s friendship; he was practically my own brother now.

“Itachi, how are you?” I asked. I couldn’t help but grin goofily at him.

“Spectacular.” He replied, still smiling lightly. He must have been happy that Sasuke was back in Seattle. “And yourself?”

“Oh, you know me, Itachi. Working hard, but still living every day to the fullest.”

Itachi patted me on the head. A common raven trait I was starting to notice. But it was okay when Itachi did it, he was a very intimidating person at first but when you got over your initial pants wetting, he was actually very sweet.  “Though, I cannot help but wonder why you’re in a physics lecture.”

“Ah…” I rubbed the back of my head sheepishly, feeling the sweat of awkwardness building up on my brow. How do I explain this to Itachi without him thinking I’m still in love with his brother? “Sasuke came to watch my lecture yesterday and issued me a teaching challenge!” it was only a part lie, sticking close enough to the truth to where I wouldn’t look like such an obsessive weirdo.

“Hn.” Itachi replied, looking very thoughtful, a slight smirk on his lips. “Sasuke is quite good; I hope you didn’t make a bet on it.”

“As if!” I announced. “I could teach circles around Sasuke, I have panache! Teme has great hair, that’s it.”

Itachi chuckled in this throat, shaking his head. He was still smiling at me. “Sasuke taught at his Ivy, Naruto. He had to put up with the most annoying and nerve-gritting of students. The ones who were fathered in, the ones who would suck up, the ones who thought they knew everything. His lecture will be nothing more than immaculate.”

“Is that why you’re pretending to be sick, Professor Uchiha?” I perked up hearing Gaara’s voice. He sounded bored and tired, like he usually did. He took the seat next to Itachi, who was smirking evilly at the red head.

“Perhaps, perhaps.” Itachi had always been like this. He would hand Sasuke opportunities to prove himself and Sasuke never particularly seemed to notice his brother’s intentions. I remembered the first time I saw Itachi doing this, allowing Sasuke to get a much needed pride booster from their father. It was weird, a lot of what Itachi did seemed to always benefit Sasuke greatly somehow. I smiled at the Uchiha. “But don’t tell Sasuke, he was quite sour with me when I told him that he would be teaching today. I lied and said I had a doctor’s appointment.”

I nearly fell out of my chair at the admittance. Well, Itachi may have good intentions at heart, but I knew he was quite the crafty man when he needed to be.

“It is no business of mine what you tell your brother. You want people other than the students to witness his teaching, I understand it perfectly.” Gaara said coolly, eyeing me. “Naruto, it is nice to see you.”

“Gaara,” My voice had such a pleading quality to it, “please tell me you’re here for reasons other than Sai telling you to be.”

“Oh, did he text you about recording this too?” How could he say that so casually?!

“I live with him. That was the request I woke up to.”

“You should move out.”

“I’ve considered it. But Seattle is too expensive to be roommate-less.” I sighed.  

“WHAT DID I MISS?” Sai jumped over one of the seats settling himself right next to me, leaning over the chair’s arm and into my face. “Did Sasuke already teach? Am I too late?”

“Sai, what are you doing here?!” I wanted to strangle him. He had to be kidding me, right? Did he seriously cut class to be here? What kind of TA does that? We were supposed to be molding the minds of the newest generation, not scoping out my past love interest!

“I let class out an hour early.” He said with a triumphant smile. “I knew I couldn’t rely on you to do this for me. And even if Gaara is TA-ing for this section, I knew he wouldn’t partake either.” Sai seemed a little miffed, sticking his tongue out at the red head. “If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself.”

“I’m so glad you don’t participate in Sai’s shenanigans, Gaara. You are my sanity in this storm.” I said with a smile, gripping his hands gently.

Gaara nodded, as if he truly understood my pain.

 “Also, why are we in the middle of nowhere? I wanted to be upfront and watch!” Sai crossed his arms over his chest, and seemed like he was actually three year old tantrum pouting. Typical Sai bullshit was going to seriously send me to the psych ward.  

“Well then, mosey on up there.” I said raising my hand to indicate the front of the room. We were in the farthest corner I could find and I still managed to be sniffed out. I hoped Sasuke wouldn’t be able to see me, it would give him too much pleasure to know I was too curious to stay away.

“No, I feel if I was just there, he might throw me out the lecture hall.” Sai said in a thoughtful manner. “It may actually better to watch him from a far.”  

The lights started to dim in the back rows as Sasuke walked out onto the small stage, microphone clipped into his shirt. He was adjusting it as he played around briefly with the classroom computer, bringing down a set of large chalkboards from the ceiling with a few clicks of a button. A projector screen also fell casting a clearer picture of him and the boards behind him, obviously meant for the students who hid in the back like I was.

Sai grabbed onto my arm, looking far too excited to learn about physics. Itachi seemed amused by this, as he laughed softly, sending me a very all-too-knowing look. “Are you so interested in my baby brother that you’ve brought your friends along to assess him?” Itachi’s words made me twitch with embarrassment. Sai leaned over me, eyes looking like he had won the lottery.

“Itachi, it’s nothing like that!” I tried to assure but Sai’s face meant to betray me.

“If you’re Sasuke’s brother, you can tell me all about the other half of my OTP!” Sai was smiling, practically fawning over Itachi like a pre-pubescent girl would over a teen-sensation. “Naruto is so stingy, he doesn’t like sharing.”

“Oh, this again?” Gaara sounded absolutely bored, sending Sai an absolutely chilling glare. “Sai, this ‘OTP’ and ‘shipping’ business is far too childish for a man who’s going to be twenty-five this year.” The red head sighed, suddenly turning his attention to me, talking over Sasuke’s introduction. “Also, Naruto, how could you share those things with Sai? I know you live together and your relationship was longer than ours, but really? I had to hear it all from him, of all people.”

“You try living with Sai, it’s like living in Guantanamo bay. I’ve been tormented for information.” I muttered, eye twitching at the annoyed sound in Gaara’s voice as he ‘hmph’ed at me. How could he be mad about that? Sai practically forced the information out of me. And since Gaara obviously knew all about it now, he must have known the way in which I was forced to reveal everything! Also, why the fuck were my exes such good friends? This would never cease to boggle my mind.

“So, you had a relationship with Gaara and your fine raven friend. Interesting.” Itachi turned his head towards me, smiling eerily at me, as though I had somehow betrayed him in a horrid fashion but he was pretending he wasn’t mad. “Well, well…Does Sasuke know about this?”

“No, Naruto’s too dick-less to tell Sasuke.” Sai replied, smiling.

“Hn, infinitely interesting.” Itachi mused.

“EXCUSE ME?!” I yelled, passing both ravens a hard look.

The two people from earlier turned around again, shushing us, glaring even harder than before. Itachi leaned forward, putting on his scariest, stoic face, eyes shining with murderous intent. It was a look only a true Uchiha could produce; it was in their DNA, I swear. “How about you two mind your own business before I decide the fate of your grades?” As if they hadn’t realized who Itachi was before, both seemed to suddenly get a look of utter fear, picking up their things and moving farther forward as to avoid Itachi’s threat. “Continue, please, Sai, was it?” Sai was smiling wickedly and I was caught in the middle of both of them. Gaara shook his head, turning in his seat to watch Sasuke’s lecture. I wanted very much to do the same but the two ravens leaning across from me, talking with such familiarity, blocked any view I had.

Were their evil minds going to fuse together? Because I could barely deal with Sai, let alone the wicked genius Itachi was. What if Itachi was Sasuke’s Sai? Would he understand my suffering? Would he know of the torment I have faced in my short life? I feel like normal people didn’t have to endure things like this on a daily basis. My life was bullshit.

Eventually, whatever they were talking about died down because they both disengaged from each other, giving me quite a clear view of Sasuke. To be fair, by this point I had no idea what the fuck he was talking about because I missed all of the crucial details while Itachi and Sai had their insufferable pow-wow. Itachi leaned back in his seat, smirking a little. “You know, you picked a really good day to watch the lecture.”

I looked over at him. “What do you mean?”

“It’s demo day.” Itachi replied cryptically.

What the hell does that mean, anyway? Like was Sasuke going to ride across the stage on a wrecking ball? Because that was something I don’t think I even wanted to see. However, if he was going to do it, I was sooo going to record it and tease him about it later. Nothing like gashing his invincible pride.

I turned my head towards the stage as a man walked off, giving Sasuke a thumbs up as he did so. He nodded his thanks. A heavy ball was swinging slightly in the middle of the stage. Oh my God, my fucking thoughts were coming true?!

“I have here, a pendulum.”

Eh. Close enough, I guess.  

Sasuke waltzed across the lecture stage, pushing his glasses up on his nose. His body moved in a strong glide; my eyes were fixed to him, infinitely curious. I had no fucking idea what he was talking about since I hadn’t been privy to that information because of two certain people but I couldn’t look away from him now. He was consuming the room with respectful, awe filled silence from his students. The sound of his voice, the motion of his body, they were all I could see, all I noticed. “It is an object that weights fifteen kilograms…” He went to the heavy, metallic looking ball which was suspended from the ceiling.  He grabbed it, lifting it with ease. “I can lift this up one meter, as I have done now. That means…what?”

He looked around the room and for a moment I thought he spotted me in the back. I tensed but then his eyes brushed past me; maybe he didn’t see. This room is huge, after all.

No one said anything, everyone just blinked, letting the silence be all consuming, all existing. “It means I have done work. MGH is the work I have done; I have increased the potential energy of this object. Fifteen times ten is hundred fifty joules…”

Sasuke moved slightly, still holding the ball. “If I let it fall…” He raised both eyebrows, a smirk on his face. “Well, it’ll be converted to kinetic energy.”

Sasuke took a few steps back, letting the ball reach the same height on his chest as he pulls it up; giving the rope the ball is attached to, a path. “If I let it swing, from one meter high and you were to stand on the other side of it and let it hit you…You would be dead. It only takes a hundred fifty joules to kill a human.”  

I watched, feeling my heartbeat pick up. “With the same principle, they use this in wrecking balls to demolish buildings. Converting gravitational potential energy into kinetic energy to destroy objects. It is incredibly simple.” There was a small metal box suspended from the wall. Sasuke let the ball drop. Swinging in an arch, the rope took the ball straight to the metal box, the glass inside the metal rim smashing to tiny pieces upon impact. Sasuke smirked, nodding his head. He grabbed the rope as it swung back, stumbling slightly as he got the pendulum to stop swinging. “So, you’re using then, the conversion of one form of energy to another to create this ‘wrecking’.”

He was a phenomenal lecturer; I hung off his every word. Well, now that I was paying attention, he was phenomenal. All the other stuff up until this point could have put me to sleep for all I knew; science and I had never been good friends. Though, I still had no fucking idea what he was talking about. Conversion of energy? More like: why are you wearing glasses Sasuke? Nerd.

But I was so engrossed in what he was saying now, though, that I glossed over everything I had no information for. “Since I am such a strong believer in the conservation of mechanical energy, I am willing to put my life on the line.”

Mutters and chuckles filled the lips of students as they nervously leaned over each other to discuss what Sasuke was saying. I felt sourness in my gut. “If I release that ball from a certain height, then that ball can never come  _back_  to a point where the height is any larger.” Sasuke removed the metal box by unscrewing the small bolts on the corners, setting on the side of the lecturing stage. “If I release it from this height,” He poked the wall with his hand and then stepped back a few meters across the stage. “Then it can never gain a height higher than the height from which it was released, due to the conversion of energy and then the reconversion and so forth. That is what we are told. That is what I believe.”

Sasuke came back to the wall, placed his back against it, the metal ball still in hand. Everyone was staring, some with mouths open as Sasuke pulled the heavy ball towards his torso. “Provided I give this object no speed while I stand here, I will be correct. I trust the conversation of mechanical energy.” Sasuke let the ball tap his chin, lining it up for when he would drop it. My heart was thundering. If he fucked this up, he could die. He already said that. Sweat beaded up on my brow. How could he look so cool? How could he not show a single bead of nervous sweat? “That being said, I don’t not fully trust myself to release this object a zero speed. It may come back and touch my chin, but hopefully it will not crush my chin. And if that is the case, well, I guess you guys won’t exactly have a final to worry about…”

Everyone in the room was bubbling with nervous laughter. I felt my fingers cramping from how tightly my fists were clenched. Why was I here? Why was I watching this?

Sasuke closed his eyes. “Three, two, one…” He released the ball and the air caught up in my throat as it made the first swing across the room. There was a few nervous gasps as it swung back, barely brushing Sasuke on the chin. He opened his eyes, back flat against the wall. He smirked. “And that is how we know physics still works and I am alive. Have a good rest of your day.”  

Everyone immediately started clapping and I let out a breath I didn’t know I had been holding. Itachi was smirking next to me, obviously satisfied with Sasuke’s performance. Students started to swarm the stage as Sasuke pulled the microphone off his shirt. I only barely caught it; Sasuke looked up towards the farthest corner of the room, the corner in which I sat…He winked at me.

HE FUCKING WINKED AT ME WHICH MEANT HE KNEW I WAS HERE THE ENTIRE TIME!

I felt heat rushing into my cheeks as Sai leaned into my face, smiling ridiculously wide.

God please help me…  
\--

“Sai, this better be important.” Gaara complained, sitting down across from the raven haired artist. He was calmly stirring sugar into his black coffee.

“It is important, Gaara. I need to talk about the other half of my OTP.”

“You need to stop referring to them as that.” Gaara observed, his luminous green eyes sparkling with annoyance in the dim light. Sai was just smiley and obviously didn’t seem fazed by Gaara’s annoyance for what the two past lovers were called. The red head sighed, conceding. “Which one is it this time?”

Sai breathed out, pulling off his visor and setting it down on the table. He ran a hand through his hair. “Naruto.”

Sasuke immediately perked up hearing the Dobe’s name mentioned so casually by the other raven. He hadn’t meant to listen in. Hell, he hadn’t even meant to go into Starbucks today but since Itachi was playing sick with him, he needed a pick-me-up so he could finish going over and adjusting the lectures to his teaching style. Itachi even suggested he come to this specific Starbucks since the off-campus WIFI was far more efficient and speedy than the ones shared on campus. Sasuke’s eyes narrowed slightly, trying to focus on his work. The WIFI part had been true but…

“What about him?”

“Don’t you think it’s kinda weird?”

“Sai, you’re going to have to be more specific. I think a lot of things about Naruto aren’t considered to be normal.” Gaara rolled his eyes. “But then again, he has been living with you for nearly six years so that could have contributed.”

“That’s what I mean.”

“Mean about what?”

“Naruto being weird.”

“Oh? So you agree that you made Naruto weird?”

Sasuke couldn’t focus on his work and had to physically restrain himself from turning his head so he could hear the two of them better. Over the soft humming of customers and the music, he had to focus his hearing on them to just make out what they were saying. Perhaps if he moved closer…

The Uchiha shook his head at that comment. They would definitely notice him then. He was practically obscured by the table separating them; it was full of girls who kept sneaking little glances over at the Uchiha, eyes hungry.

Sai brushed off Gaara’s comment, shaking his head. “No, no, I mean…” The raven stopped in the middle of his sentence, as if recalculating his thoughts. “This could be my psychology degree talking but Naruto and I could be considered close, right?”

“Well, yeah, I suppose so.”

“And he and Sasuke are close, right?”

Sasuke perked up again, hearing his name and wondering what exactly the two of them were talking about. This didn’t seem like your average conversation. The Uchiha stretched his back, his chair scooting away from the table as he moved somewhat closer towards the pair.

“I swear to God, Sai, if the next thing out of your mouth is about a threesome, I’m leaving.” Gaara said darkly.

The Uchiha made an amused sound in the back of his throat, smirking despite himself. As if he would ever have a threesome with Naruto and that annoying guy.

“Ménage a trios aside,” Sai continued; the smile could be heard in his voice. “I just mean, it seems strange to me that Naruto is open about everything else except his relationships.”  Gaara nodded his head, agreeing. “It shouldn’t have to take me beating him at a game for him to fess up.”

“Good job, by the way.” The red head complimented.

“Thank you.” Sai smiled with much happiness. “But I digress, Naruto admitted to me that Sasuke doesn’t know about us.”

Sasuke perked up once again having his name dropped for a second time. He couldn’t help himself. He turned towards the pair, locking them in his sights. The Uchiha could hear them far more clearly now and they didn’t seem to notice his stare at all, enwrapped in their conversation.

“Naruto didn’t tell him?”

“Nope.”

“How is that a problem? Shouldn’t you be relieved?” Gaara questioned. “You seem pretty convinced that Sasuke is here  _specifically_  for Naruto.”

Sasuke couldn’t help but scoff a little at that comment.

A picture of his brother came into Sasuke’s head and he knew when he got home, he might very well throttle his ‘sick’ Aniki. Sometimes some of Itachi’s intentions were not so well hidden.

“Besides, it’ll also be easier for me as well. We work together, after all.” Gaara continued and the red head brushed his bangs out his face. “Sasuke not knowing about my relationship with Naruto may actually be for the best.”

The Uchiha nearly choked on the coffee he sipped at. Naruto had told him he had other relationships but as the blond informed him, he was currently single and had been for the past couple years. Sasuke started to wonder if he had misread the relationship status between Sai and his blond. His eyes narrowed considerably as he pulled his laptop cord from it the plug. He closed the laptop as well, despite his own mental protesting that he was getting too invested in this conversation. So what if Naruto had relationships? Hadn’t he also had other relationships? Sasuke frowned.

“Yes, but your relationship with Naruto was a lot shorter than the one with me. We dated for almost two years before we went to ‘friends-with-benefits’ status.”

“Sometimes, I can’t believe he still sleeps with you.”

“We almost slept together last night too.” Sai replied, almost triumphant. “But then he punched me. Not the physical contact I wanted.”

“Hm…” Gaara mused thoughtfully. “Knowing you as well as I do, I can only suppose you took it over the line.”

“I just offhandedly told him he could call me ‘Sasuke’ during. I wouldn’t be offended. It would be like role-playing.”

Sasuke’s frown only deepened as he thought about Naruto with that annoying raven. His hands all over the blond’s skin, kissing him, making love to his body. His fingers started to ball into a fist.

“You really have absolutely no tact, do you?” Gaara shook his head.

“I digress again.” Sai said putting up a finger as if to interject. “If it is blaringly obvious to me why he’s not spilling it, you must know too.”

“He just doesn’t like to talk about those things.”

“Not true.” The raven shook his head. “When I asked why the two of you broke up, he told me clearly without much prodding. It took years of torment to get Naruto to even open up about Sasuke a little. Apparently the sex was great, by the way.”

“I don’t want to know.” Gaara waved his hand dismissively. “I’m not obsessive, like you.”

“But you do think that it’s strange, right?”

Gaara sighed loudly. “Yes, well, but it is obvious why Naruto doesn’t like to talk about it.”

Sasuke leaned back even farther in his chair, mind flying around as he jumped from one conclusion to another. And what, dearest sage Gaara, was the reason why Naruto was so secretive?

“I also think it is obvious, but why is he hiding it?” Sai replied, shaking his head. Sasuke thought for a moment that the raven had spotted him but he didn’t make any move to acknowledge him. “Sasuke is also the same in that regard.”

“Tch, you seem so sure about that.” Gaara muttered.

“Psychologist, remember? I don’t just run experiments on lab rats.” Sai replied. “I’ve had to sit down and have real sessions with students. When they don’t open up, they’re hiding something. Those things are all pretty revealing signs. I mean, I’ve had my suspicions for years. That’s why I broke up with Naruto.”

“Really? I always thought it was mutual thing.”

“It was; my reasoning was different than his, however. He said the charm had left our relationship because we spent too much time together; I knew he’d never love me as much as I loved him.” Sai clarified. “But the physical stuff was fine. Which was why the benefits clause was in the terms of our break-up. He doesn’t particularly like going out and finding new partners. It is sloppy and messy, not to mention impersonal. He is a creature of habit. And he knew I would completely indulge him because they were my own desires too.”

“I also had that feeling when Naruto and I were dating that perhaps, as his partner, I was inadequate.” Gaara sighed, rubbing the area between his eyes.

“It kind of hurts to know, right?”

Sasuke slid his laptop back into his carrying case. He was going to do it. He was going to go over there and demand every iota of information out of the two of them. Sasuke wanted to know everything he could. There was a strong emotion bubbling up in his gut. They were dancing around the topic entirely neither of them  _said_  what he wanted to hear from them. He needed the confirmation.

“Let’s stop talking about such a gloomy topic.” Sai added suddenly. Sasuke was only a couple steps away from their table and a sudden possessive heat enter his blood. They couldn’t just drop that topic like it was nothing. He needed to know more! “Naruto’s party tomorrow, are you coming?”

“I know I will.” Sasuke said, not knowing where such a strong tone of voice came from inside of him. Gaara’s eyes widened as the Uchiha dragged a chair over to the table, taking a seat in between them. His pale green eyes flicked between the two ravens. Sai didn’t look shocked at all that Sasuke had suddenly appeared. Gaara frowned, clicking his tongue.

“Typical.” He muttered under his breath, kicking Sai’s shin from underneath the table.

“I’m glad you’ll be coming Sasuke.” Sai’s smile was too bright, too revealing. The Uchiha ‘hn’ed at the comment, only nodding. “Oh, by the way, has Naruto sent you our address?”

“Itachi has it.” Sasuke replied in a monotone. “They’re close.”

“Excellent.” Sai suddenly got up, making Gaara have a somewhat strained look to his face. “Well, I have to get back to work. If you’re ever here while I’m working, Sasuke, I’ll give you a free discount on coffee.” The raven winked at the Uchiha before grabbing his visor and slipping it back on.

Gaara bit the inside of his lip, wondering if Sasuke had heard everything. The Uchiha got up from his spot. “Please excuse me, I will also be leaving to finish working.” The red head nodded feeling like he had dodged a bullet.   
\--

The one thing I loved about Seattle during fall is that it always got dark around the perfect time. Bathing the city in all it's unnatural, florescent light. Sai had gone through the arduous task of renting out our apartment complex’s patio for the night. It was usually used for get-togethers which were supposed to inspire neighborly comradery. Sai and I were always too busy to go. But tonight, against the expanse of city lights and stars, this was where my party would be taking place. The night air was perfectly cool and slightly moist; the forecast said it wasn’t supposed to rain tonight but since we were in Washington, we prepared a canopy. Rain and coffee; that was Seattle.  

Sai really took parties too seriously, lighting up tiki torches and stringing paper lamps with little Christmas tree sized lights in them all around the paved over area, giving off an eerily romantic lighting. He even set up a small bar area, where people could get drinks, which he personally volunteered to make, claiming his barista experience was infallible for mixing up cocktails. Of course, he started working there after the first incident as bar master so…

He really was perfect to host this, even though I wanted everyone to enjoy themselves and not have him work so hard. He insisted though. And once Sai set his mind to something, it would happen.

I opened up a glass sliding door, hearing the slight thumping of the music from the other side. Sai just brought out his laptop for the occasion, with little, incredibly effective speakers and made some kind of playlist so when everyone was drunk enough, they would start dancing. I knew that was a guilty pleasure of mine, usually dragging an equally drunk Sai or Sakura to the dance floor with me. They never seemed to mind.

I walked out with a tray, something that Sai had asked me to buy beforehand so we could have ‘proper’ party food. Luckily Dick’s was known for their sliders so I doubted anyone would complain. Besides, parties are for fun. No one wants to eat healthy when you’re having fun. Cucumber slices, boo. But sliders, stupendously yay. I handed the tray to Sai and he placed them on a small table with chips, dip, and plates. He had really gone all out this year; as almost demonstrated by the wide collection of bottles gathered around the bar.

He stood by the small bar, admiring his handy work. I leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. He smiled at me. “Thank you, Sai.”

“Anything for my dick-less.” He said with a shrug. “Plus this way, it gets me out of buying you a present.” 

“Stingy.” I commented, smiling.

People were already lingering around; I spied Gaara and Sakura chatting by the cooler filled with bitch beer and regular ol’ brewskis. Both of them laughed when one my associates from the department fumbled with the cooler lid, practically throwing it in the grass after exerting too much force. Sai ‘tsk’ed his tongue but shook his head. He slid behind the bar, smiling lightly at me as he pulled out a glass.

“Now, what can I get you to start your party right?”

“I feel like if I said ‘surprise me’, you’d just give me a cup full of vodka and I’d end up in our bathroom all night, again.”

“Wouldn’t be my fault if you drank it all.” Sai said, shaking my finger. “This will not be a repeat of your twenty-third birthday; I learned from that mistake.”

Ah yes, the year where Sai made everyone’s drinks too strong and we all ended up vomiting. And by all I literally mean all; no one was spared. It wasn’t a pretty scene. But I threw up on Sai right before we were going to have sex, so I mean it wasn’t a complete disaster. He even admitted when I had my head in the toilet and he was in the shower, throwing up and showering at the same time, that it was his ‘bad’.

The year after, admittedly we were all a little wary of his drinks but they proved to be much better that time. So, I could only assume this year I won’t end up in the bathroom again.

“Uhh, what do you recommend?”

Sai handed me a drink in no time flat, giving me an absolutely over the top little umbrella to go with it. He smiled. “Tequila sunrise.”

“Really? Tequila this early?”

“I want you to shake that ass!” Sai said with really poorly hidden amusement. He laughed a little as an arm slung over my shoulder, embracing me in a sloppy back-hug.

“I think we all want to see that.” I turned, seeing Sasuke looking down at my drink. “Tequila already?”

“Sasuke! Oh my God! It’s been  _years_  since I’ve seen you.” Sakura came rushing up to us, throwing her arms around him while he pulled away from me. He gave her a somewhat limp hug and she immediately pulled back, examining him with a skeptical eye. “Why are you here?”

“You didn’t tell Sakura about moving back?” I questioned. Sasuke just shrugged.

“YOU MOVED BACK!?” She threw her arms around Sasuke again. “I can’t believe it!”

“Believe it.” Sasuke said with a smirk. “I’m here, in the flesh. Your arms are around me, after all.”  

“The three of us together again reminds me so much about our High school days.” Sakura said with a far-off look. The three of us were practically inseparable, being the three best of friends. Though, Sakura initially got close to me to get closer to Sasuke, she eventually grew out of the childish crush, even being the first person to really congratulate us when Sasuke and I got together. “You guys gunna act out those days tonight?” Sakura winked at me and I sputtered, feeling flushed.

Sai slammed down another drink on the bar, sliding it a little closer to Sasuke. It was thick with red juice, looking more like blood than anything. I felt a little sick at the thickness of the concoction. “Bloody Mary. Itachi informed me that you don’t really like sweet things.” He sent a small wave towards the said Uchiha who was chatting with Gaara. The Uchiha winked back. I felt a sinking feeling in my gut.  

Sasuke took the drinking, nodding. “Thanks.”

“Shall we begin the party now?” I took a large swig of my drink to answer Sai’s question, but also hoping it would quell the fire burning in my cheeks from Sakura’s comment. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CUE THE WHITESNAKE!

I didn’t exactly remember when it occurred, but feeling the heated press of Sasuke’s strong body against me while we danced was something to be treasured. The way we moved together, barely separated by clothes. It also reminded me that out of everyone here, I had specifically picked him to be my drunk dancing partner. We had been well into our third drinks, chatting, joking around with everyone when the urge had hit me. It only took a little begging before Sasuke was up on his feet, pressing his chest into my back, swaying with me. He felt good, almost too perfect.

_I should have known better_   
_Than to let you go alone,_   
_It's times like these_   
_I can't make it on my own_   
_Wasted days, and sleepless nights_   
_And I can't wait to see you again_

I hooked my arm around his neck, pulling his closer to me. His hands were on my hips; I could feel his groin fully pressed into my ass, lips cascading up and down my neck. The kissing was surprisingly gentle and welcomed. I didn’t remember when it had gotten to this point either. But I was incredibly aroused, falling into the rhythm of Sasuke’s body. Or maybe he was falling into mine. Either way, how he was touching me, how he pressed against me, I never wanted it to end. I felt good, head dizzy with alcohol and arousal. 

_I find I spend my time_   
_Waiting on your call,_   
_How can I tell you, baby_   
_My back's against the wall_   
_I need you by my side_   
_To tell me it's alright,_   
_'Cos I don't think I can take anymore_

Sasuke turned me in his arms, wrapping his arms around my waist. I had my arms up around his shoulder, our eyes were locked together. This song was too slow to grind too but it made me feel weird; having Sasuke embracing me so closely like this. I put my head down against his shoulder, feeling oddly like we were at high school prom all over again. We slow danced exactly like this, despite the stares and the comments. That night was beautiful, just like this one. It always seemed that my world was rose tinted when Sasuke held me.

_Is this love that I'm feeling,_   
_Is this the love, that I've been searching for_   
_Is this love or am I dreaming,_   
_This must be love,_   
_'Cos it's really got a hold on me,_   
_A hold on me..._

His body was so warm against me. Sasuke always ran a little hot and I craved his heat to press even harder against me. It was so comforting, so nice. I’d spent my nights in these arms plenty of times in the past, but now, it just felt so…Relieving. I picked my head up from his shoulder, nestling it against his neck instead, and breathing hotly against the pale skin I found there. Sasuke’s hands moved up from my waist, weaving into my hair and lightly rubbing against my scalp in the way he knew I liked. I smiled.

_I can't stop the feeling_   
_I've been this way before_   
_But, with you I've found the key_   
_To open any door_   
_I can feel my love for you_   
_Growing stronger day by day,_   
_An' I can't wait to see you again_   
_So I can hold you in my arms_

The press of his mouth was unexpected but I didn’t care. He tasted just like I remembered he did; sweet with the heady aftertaste of tomato juice. One my hands slide down his arm, wishing I could feel his skin under the thicker material of his sweatshirt. The other wrapped into Sasuke’s hair, pulling him closer to me as he pressed his tongue into my parting lips. It was like he had never left. Happiness bubbled up in my chest, spreading through me like fire. His lips were just as soft, just as skilled, just a perfectly shaped…They always fit mine like a glove. 

_Is this love that I'm feeling,_   
_Is this the love, that I've been searching for_   
_Is this love or am I dreaming,_   
_This must be love,_   
_'Cos it's really got a hold on me,_   
_A hold on me..._

It always dissolved when his mouth met mine. The world was nothing but a blur of sound and sensation spinning away, melting and dissolving. A flurry engulfed me as those lips pressed into mine, again and again, massaging and parting, moving so seductively. He whispered against my lips words and sweetness I couldn’t make out and the world soaked it up, tinting it and staining it in the colors of the moment.

_Is this love that I'm feeling,_   
_Is this the love, that I've been searching for..._   
_Is this love or am I dreaming,_   
_Is this the love, that I've been searching for..._

When the song ended Sasuke’s lips were still on mine, but we were standing completely still now, not bothering to move off the dance floor even though we weren’t dancing. His body against mine was just too good; I had missed him so much.

“I’m so glad you’re here.” I muttered against his lips. He nodded, his forehead pressing into mine, his eyes were closed, as if he was savoring our closeness. “I missed you.” I kissed him on the side of his mouth and he pulled me even closer to him, embracing me hard. His arousal pressed into mine for a moment; we shuddered.

“Naruto, I want to talk to you about something,” Sasuke grabbed my ass, squeezing and kneading it. I couldn’t hold back my quiet moan, letting it sail from my throat. His nose brushed against mine and I felt lusty eyes staring into mine. “Can we move into somewhere more private?” It took me awhile to realize that we weren’t alone. I took a passing glance around the area, noting everyone was pretty drunk too, not really paying us much attention. I doubted they would notice if Sasuke and I slipped away.

“Come up to my room?” It was just a suggestion and by the sudden straining in my jeans, perhaps it was more like a command.

Sasuke nodded, following as I led him into the complex.

It was a blur, my mind whirling and spinning, somehow feeling doubt even after Sasuke had made his intentions clear to me. We were going to engage in the carnal pleasures of sin, letting lust bury its way into our hearts and allow us to act foolishly. It was what I felt that kept me from turning around to look at his face, heat spreading through mine as I opened the door to my apartment. Sai was still downstairs with the others and would hopefully remain there indefinitely.

I wanted to just share myself and my shame with Sasuke tonight.

We didn’t make it to my bed before he was on top of me, pressing me into the wall of my bedroom. His mouth on mine, desperately prodding into my cavern, mapping it with ease. I couldn’t hold back my moans, his hands scorching my skin with desire as he traced it all. It was like he committing it all to memory, or maybe he was trying to jump-start the long forgotten times when we had been wrapped in each other.

Either way, I opened up to him immediately.

The press of his hot mouth against mine was enough to send the waves of arousal shooting through my gut. I was so in tune, so in love with him. He was so perfect, even when his mouth tasted bitter with the aftermath of vodka and tomato. His hands were more clumsy then, pushing at my clothes, trying to expose more and more of my body to him. We were in my room, on my floor, not having made it to the bed in time for our drunken encounter.

We were in sync with each other’s desires. We never said them aloud, never said what we were actually thinking, actually feeling. But it was fine. I never wanted to have the moments like this end. 

His breath was musty, sweet and sour with alcohol. He tasted of it, swam in it. But I never minded it when it was like this. His taste only got better with age.

“Sasuke,” I pulled back for a moment, wiping the excess saliva on the back of my hand, “don’t you even dare think that you can tear up my ass on this floor. I’ll never be able to walk again.”

Sasuke smirked, pinning my hands down and silencing my mouth with his again. “Don’t I take good care of you, though, Naruto?” I was surprised when he spoke those words into my ears. They made me shiver, back arching. His voice, his tongue, his fingers, his everything. I wanted it all. I was selfish.

Wrapping my legs around his waist practically sealed my fate. I had entered the territory long remembered by my body. I could feel him straining in his jeans, wishing that we were naked so he could fully press himself into me. I also had that desire. 

I started to strip, pulling off my jacket and shirt, not caring about the awkwardness or the embarrassment that nagged my mind. Sasuke was nodding, watching me bear it all for him. Dark eyes scanned me with hunger, so much pent up lust finally coming to fruition. His hands were on my chest, fingers slowly, teasingly, touching me. I shuddered at the touch, gasping only slightly when his mouth came up to my stomach, tasting me, licking me, engulfing my skin in the volley of touches and urges I had wanted since he first arrived.

We crashed back down onto my floor again, me on top of him his time. The material of his sweatshirt rubbing against my exposed chest as I ground myself into him. Sasuke rolled us over, our bodies writhing. He pulled back tugging at the hem of his sweatshirt before pulling it off. Underneath it, he just wore a black wife-beater. His dark eyes were gleaming with an emotion I couldn’t name but it made me want to pull him close.

He stood up suddenly, reaching down and picked me up in a mess of limbs. I was confused at the movement until he practically tossed me into my bed. He sat down on the edge, but he wasn’t facing me. I crawled closer to him, sliding my arm down so that I could hang around his neck. He turned his head towards me, giving me a soft kiss on the cheek.

“Naruto…” He began and I could hear the apprehension in his voice. He was fiddling with his pocket, teeth gritting a little. “When I said I wanted to talk…I was…I mean…”

I got more sober than I thought possible, adrenaline from the embarrassment flooding my blood and burning away the tingling of the alcohol. The heat in my cheeks was now from the absolute hatred I felt for getting caught up in my drunken emotions and the arousal. I shook my head, laughing. I really just wanted to cry. “I-I’m sorry, Sasuke.” Be still my heart. “Goddammit, I’m such an idiot…This is why I shouldn’t drink.” I couldn’t look at him when I said it, feeling too stupid for my own good. Sasuke turned around, looking at me, actually grabbing my hand, pulling me closer.

“Don’t do that.” Sasuke said, a little too quickly. He was looking at me and I noticed it, his cheeks were flushed and I could tell it wasn’t from the alcohol or from our previous activities. He actually looked embarrassed. “Don’t misunderstand me. I…I wanted to do…” Sasuke made an awkward hard gesture. “That…”

“We're drunk, Teme.”

He was chewing his bottom lip. “Do you remember the day before I left for College?” His sudden change of topic made me feel even more apprehensive. Where the hell was he going with this? Did the vodka turn his head to mush?

But, oh, how could I forget? His body had been all mine that day. It was our last official day in a relationship and we had made the most out of it. It was not a day I dwelled on without feeling a pang of longing. “W-well, yeah, of course I do.”

“No, I mean…” Sasuke stopped, letting frustration cloud his features as he closed his eyes. It looked like he was having a mental debate with himself. He took a deep breath pulling something out of his pocket. “I can already tell…You don’t remember. But I do.” Sasuke slid a small box into my hand; the one from his pocket. Its wrapping was simple black paper with a silver bow. I felt my heartbeat very clearly in my ears. The box was small meaning it was something VERY small, more than likely jewelry.

This couldn’t actually be…

There was no way….

Slowly, tentatively I started to remove the bow, my fingers were shaking as I tugged the ribbon away. Heart be still, please stop beating so loudly in my ears. I don’t…I don’t want to get too worked up over nothing. With the black paper falling away, I noticed it was definitely a box small enough for jewelry. But nothing like a bracelet or a watch or like anything that was larger.

I couldn’t contain myself when I peeled the top of the box open, disbelief flooding my gut.

“What is this…?”

“What does it look like?” Sasuke’s voice was surprisingly steady, even though his gaze didn’t even fall on me. I could tell he was embarrassed too. But he also seemed sure. The tone of his voice was definitely sure.

“I…It…” I couldn’t process it. The small silvery band, simple, stunning, shining so brightly in the box. It wasn’t just a gift. I knew that. “You…I’m…”

“Seven years ago, Naruto…” I didn’t know where this was all coming from, my head was too foggy with confusion and alcohol. “We promised, remember?”

Promised? What the hell is that? I don’t remember this promise! And even worse, he sounded like it was a universal truth that I could not avoid. Why did he seem so certain about this?!

“You can’t just ask someone to marry you because of a promise, Sasuke! That’s asinine!” I retorted, disbelief and doubt making my heart feel like it was dancing in ice. I felt sick but _happy_ …I didn’t understand.

Sasuke looked so conflicted. “I-I’m still in love with you.” He just calmly blurted it out, but his face was unbearably red, making his dark eyes even more fucking beautiful.  
\---

Sasuke muttered darkly to himself as he pushed the door to Itachi’s house open. For the time being, he was staying with his brother until he could find an apartment of his own. And he was hoping it would be soon; living with Itachi was like a waking nightmare.

His brother was standing in the kitchen, downing a large glass of water. He had left the party earlier than most of the other guest, spouting off something about work the next morning. He was dressed far more casually now; black shirt and gray sweats, about to go to bed. Sasuke knew if he wanted to avoid his brother now, he would have to be silent like the wind. He slowly started to walk by the kitchen, creeping along at a snail’s pace so Itachi wouldn’t notice he was back.

But the best laid plans…

Sasuke stepped down onto a particularly squeaky board and considering throwing himself out the living room window.

Itachi turned, noticing Sasuke trying to sneak by. “Hn, I can assume from the defeated posture and silent seething that you blew it.”

“I did not blow it.” Sasuke fired back, trying to burn Itachi to death with a fiery-glare. Unfortunately for Sasuke, Itachi still remained quite intact.

“Really? I’m pretty sure if you didn’t blow, you wouldn’t be here right now, am I right?” Itachi’s smirk was triumphant as Sasuke let out a heavy, burden loaded sigh.

“I didn’t blow it.” He insisted, glaring at this brother’s too-amused face.

“Riiight. Do you actually expect me to believe that? And I bet you didn’t even get any before you popped the question…” The look on Sasuke’s face revealed all to Itachi, causing the older Uchiha to laugh. Sasuke took a swing at his brother. “Ohhh, so scary. Calm down, Otouto.”

“How do you even know?!”

“I think I’ve known you long enough to figure these things out.” Itachi said with a slightly raised eyebrow. “So, are you going to actually tell me what happened or am I going to have to continue to tease you until you spill it?”

Sasuke let out the longest, most annoyed sigh he could muster. “I don’t know what you’re expecting; you pretty much guessed it.”

“Ah, so you did blow it.”

“Goddamn it, I didn’t. He just needs a little time to think it over.” Itachi gave Sasuke a skeptical look and the younger Uchiha frowned. “It’s a lot to process, Itachi.”

“You know when you first brought up this insanely convoluted plan to me, I thought you’d at least give it some more time and effort before actually executing it.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?!”

“Even though we give Naruto a lot of flak for it, he really isn’t that stupid, Sasuke.” The younger Uchiha looked somewhat astonished at his brother’s comment. “Oh, come on, you didn’t actually expect Naruto to be willing to undertake this nonsense without a second thought, did you? If I was him, I would have said ‘no’ too.”

“He didn’t exactly give me an answer…”

Itachi rolled his eyes. “Silence or rebuking kind of counts…”

“I told him I loved him still, and I know he still loves me. This is just a matter of time.”

“As much as I’d like to agree with you, Sasuke, my point still stands. Naruto is skeptical of your intentions. All he knows is that, somewhat out of the blue, you’re back, and now, _very_ suddenly, you want to get married. He’s confused, and, he’s probably hurt about it.”

Sasuke looked down at the floor, kicking at invisible dust. “Well, how exactly do I prove to him that I’m serious then?”

“Tell him the truth, firstly. You didn’t come back just for him; he needs to know that. Orochimaru sent you flying right back to the rainy, overcast of Seattle. We both know that is _really_ why you came back.” Itachi said, with a slightly lecturing quality to his speech.

“But that isn’t a full truth either. I came back for him too; I did miss him.” Sasuke rebutted, crossing his arms across his chest.

“Yes, but that was a secondary. That promise was an afterthought, if anything.” Itachi watched Sasuke's crestfallen face and felt a pang of sympathy. “Just…Start from scratch, show him things haven’t changed, that _you_ haven’t changed. Tell him about everything you went through and how much you missed him and how those feelings came rushing back. It’ll be sappy, cliché, and beautiful. He needs to know you’re not stringing him along and that all of is coming from here.” Itachi poked his brother in the chest. Sasuke nodded his head, slowly taking in Itachi’s advice.

“Yeah, I guess I can try that…” After a moment of silence, Sasuke spoke again. “Or maybe I can be eternally single like you, might be easier.”

“Excuse me,” Itachi said with a scolding tone. “Unlike you, I have not found someone who doesn’t drive me completely insane, yet. Though, Naruto’s friend, Sai, I have found myself having a great interest in; it’s been a very long while since I’ve found someone just as conniving and intrusive as myself.”

“Oh God, please, Itachi, for the love of all things holy, do not become a power couple with that man.”

“Sasuke, please. When was the last time praying ever worked for you? The notion itself is ridiculous.” Itachi smirked.  
\---

 “How could you not say ‘yes’?!” Sai demanded. The look on my face really should have told him I was in no mood at all to discuss the horrendous scene from last night. Why I told him at all, really, was a fucking mystery. I should have just kept my mouth shut and sulked in silence.

But I guess this way I can learn a lesson about how I’m a complete idiot.

“Why would I say ‘yes’?” I complained. “There is absolutely no reason for me to say anything but ‘no’…”

“But Naruto, you didn’t say ‘no’.”

“You know what, I’m pretty sure me telling him to ‘get out’ was answer enough.”

Sai sighed and flopped back on my bed. “You’re a mystery.”

“I really don’t know what you mean.” I crossed my arms over my chest and turned my head away from Sai. He stared at me, lips in a thin line.

“You love him. That’s why you’re a fucking mystery.” Sai raised his arms over his head, punching me in the arm. He rolled onto his side as I tried to retaliate.

“Of course I love Sasuke; he’s been a very good friend of mine for years.” Sai let out a large groan, rolling back onto his back. “What?”

“Don’t bullshit me, Naruto. I, of all people, know better.” Sai’s face was surprising more serious than it was usually. He sat up, looking me dead in the eye. I blinked, feeling awkward with his full attention. “Sasuke is something no one else will ever be to you. He’s your number one; your forever love. It would be stupid, even for you, to reject him.”

“How the fuck can you sit here and tell me this, Sai? You don’t know how I feel!” I stood up, abruptly, surprisingly even myself by the outburst. But still, it was true. Sai couldn’t tell me how to feel about Sasuke. I was the one who knew _him_. I was the one who picked myself back up after being shattered by _him_. My lips quivered, making my voice shake. “You can’t tell me how to feel about this Sai, I know how I feel about this. And frankly, your psychoanalytic bullshit doesn’t make me feel any differently. I was the one who stayed in Seattle, I was the one who carried on my life, alone, for seven fucking years. I know exactly how I feel.” My fists balled at my sides, anger ebbing and flowing in waves.

“Naruto, you don’t have to cry. It’s okay.” Sai stood up, wiping a tear from my cheek. I hadn’t realized that I had started. Sai’s face was neutral, soft, eyes crinkled with a tinge of hurt. He just continued to gently wipe the tears from my eyes.

I hated this.

I had never hated anything more than crying over Sasuke. 

Breathing in slow, shaky breaths, I slapped Sai’s hand away from my face and wiped away my own tears. I looked him in the eye. “I’m over it, Sai. You get it? Over. This conversation, this obsession, this whatever the fuck you wanna call it, it’s done. Get all your laughs and memories of it now because by the time I get back from Itachi’s, everything will be back to normal. Sasuke and I will just be friends, just like we’ve always been. Then you and I can go back to no-string attached, and you can continue to torment me. It’ll be _great_.”

I opened my bed room door, with full intentions of kicking in Itachi’s front door, shoving Itachi out of the way, and unloading on Sasuke. He wasn’t allowed to do this. He wasn’t allowed to come waltzing back into my life, all gorgeous and sexy, _and stupid_ , with some kind of bullshit wedding proposal. He had no idea how I felt about this. God, he was such an inconsiderate idiot.

Fuck, I’m an idiot too.

Sai’s eyes burned holes in my back as he stood in my room, unmoving, not following me. His mouth hung open slightly, obviously stunned by what I had said. But that was just it; what I said was obvious. I made a mistake letting Sasuke get that close again.

I grabbed my jacket from the rack and shoved myself into it. Determination not slipping as my keys and wallet joined me for my quest. This was it. No more. Sasuke and I are done. We are just friends. We’ll always be just that. People who pass upon the street, entangled, but never more to be enraptured.

I had made my decision. Last night was my last decision for the foolishness of the past. Now, in the present, I would swallow it all. Drink it down as the rain of my past drowned out the feelings I once had. The mist in my heart would never absolve and slip away. But the fog around my brain was cleared away as the path lay clear.

I opened the door, but stopped in my tracks as I ran straight into Sasuke’s chest.

Ah, so, this is how it was going to end. In the hallway of my apartment. With everyone listening to me. Super. Great. Phenomenal. Wonderful. Other adjectives.

I pulled back slightly, looking up as he blinked. I felt my resolve slip, ever so gently, from my grasp as he smiled at me, an awkward laugh breaking from his lips. “Well, so much for knocking.” Sasuke muttered, still smiling.

Anxiety filled up my chest as he took a step back, rubbing his arm nervously. “W-What are you doing here? I was…I was just going to talk to you.” His teeth sparkled as he smiled even wider, moving closer to me. Heat soaked into my upper arm as his fingers wound around it. “Uh…Um…I.” What did I want to say again?

Maybe I wasn’t going to make a huge scene after all.

“Well, can I go first…?” I nodded, a little hazy. Why was it always around him that I lost focus? Sasuke took a breath, biting his lip and looking a little awkward, something that didn’t fit him. He was always so confident, so sure. Only I’d ever seen him like this; vulnerable. Walls broken down. “I think you’re right.”

“Well, I’m finally glad you’ve realized my intellect.” I snapped out of daze as I looked into Sasuke’s face, the smile wasn’t there anymore. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I realized I hadn’t exactly heard what he had said and just replied out of instinct. He looked somewhat nervous, but there was gleam in his eyes, a sureness I didn’t know myself. “Excuse me?”

He wrung his hands together before putting them on my shoulders, enwrapping me in the shadow of his form. “The whole marriage thing…I think you’re right about it. It’s too sudden.”

I was about to open my mouth but Sasuke cut me off, smiling gently, like he used to, when it was just us, in his room. It was my favorite smile. The one he only shared with me. It was _mine_.

“I want to start over.” My heart beat fast in my chest at those words. “I want to prove to you things haven’t changed…that _I_ haven’t changed.” He took my hands into his own, filling them with warmth as he laced our fingers. “Let’s go on a date.”

“A date?” My voice held surprisingly well considering I felt like I might pass out. My head was swimming and whirling just being around him.

“I know this is…Weird.” Sasuke made a gesture, our hands still tangled, woven like a glove. “But, I’ll be the first to admit, I jumped the gun. I don’t know how you feel right now. I was being selfish about this. We need to take this slower. So, what do you say?”

Again, my lip quivered. I looked down, away from him so I could get a hold of my thoughts. I didn’t want to be hurt again by him. But he seemed so…Determined. So unwavering. How was he so sure? I bit the inside of my lip. Why was it that every time I was around him I forgot what I wanted to say and how I felt before? How was it that he could invade me and convince me so easily?

“Yeah, okay. We can go on a date. I’d like that.” Before I could really understand what I was saying, Sasuke leaned in, kissing me softly on the mouth.

He pulled back, smiling, still acting awkward but the expression on his face and the shining of his eyes made me ignore all that. I touched his face, rubbing his cheek with my thumb. “Now, uh, what did you want to tell me?” His heat and closeness were effecting my brain functions. Wait...I wanted to say something?

Ah, yes, the part where I was supposed to be supreme ruler of my life and shut this romance down. Funny how those words escaped me when I needed them most and we’re replaced by me encouraging what I said I was going to avoid. I must be an idiot. He just had to have perfectly shaped lips and he just had to smell amazing, didn’t he?

“Um, well, it’s not important now. I think we got it all figured out.” Sasuke let out a large breath and patted me on the shoulder.

“Good…Good.” Sasuke leaned in again, his nose brushing against mine. “As long as we understand each other.”

His mouth was so close to mine, teasing me with the light heat of his breath against my lips. With hooded lids I leaned in a little closer.     

“Oh, Naruto, I thought you were serious when we had to conversation earlier.” Sai’s presence always served to remind me that I had made horrific mistakes in my life. I turned, eyes full of fire. He was just smiling at me, all-too-knowing, and waked away, winking at me as he did so. “Don’t let me stop the two of you.” He waved as he slipped away into the kitchen.

Sasuke was glaring over my shoulder and I raised an eyebrow. He pulled me farther out in the hallway, closing the door behind us. “Um, Sasuke, what are you doing?”

“One thing, just one more thing.” He grabbed me by the shoulders, staring at me dead in the eye. “We need to do something about Itachi and Sai.”

“Wait, wait, your Itachi? Big brother, Itachi?”

“Naruto, I only have one.”

“What about them?”

“I think they’re going to start dating.”

“My God.” I paused in all thoughts, mulling over the idea of Sai and Itachi together in my head. There was nothing but evil which could be summoned from this union.

“Exactly. I don’t think I need to remind you how _badly_ Itachi meddles.” And he really didn’t. As much as I loved Itachi dearly, he just couldn’t keep to himself. Like the time, about three months before Sasuke got his acceptance letter, Itachi thought we were breaking up prematurely…And staged an intervention.

A _fucking_ intervention.

Which would have really been hilarious, had me and Sasuke known about it. But we didn’t. So when Itachi brought up the break-up, we immediately both panicked and started screaming at each other. ‘Cause I had no idea Sasuke wanted to break-up and Sasuke didn’t know I wanted to break-up, because neither of us did. Really mean things were said, by both sides. And everyone there, including Sasuke’s parents, my guardian, and a close group of our friends, saw us throw each other’s dirty laundry in each other’s faces.

It was a shit-show really.

It had been a misunderstanding, on Itachi’s part. And he did apologize for it, after he stopped laughing.

Needless to say we started hanging out mostly at my house after that.

Sasuke frowned, staring at the door behind me. “Just imagine it if he had help working on the inside.” I felt a shudder of cold spring through my spine.

“We need to do something.” I stopped, thinking for a moment. “Wait, no, we should let them.”

“Are you insane? Do you know what our lives will become?”

“Yeah but if they’re fucking or whatever, they’ll be focused on themselves and not us.” I pointed out, nodding at my own brilliance.

“Naruto, Dobe,” The grip he had on my arms was troubling. “They’ll want to go on double-dates.”

“Mother of God. We should just Romeo and Juliet ourselves out of this mess.”

“You want me to stab Sai and escalate a turf war?”

“I was gunna say take sleeping poison and fake our deaths but that might be a better option.”

“Naruto.”   

“Wait, no, you’re right. We should make it more like ‘West Side Story’ so we can snap and have fancy dance numbers.”

Sasuke snickered, placing his hands on my shoulders to break me out of this ridiculous scenario I created. He kissed me again. “Well, I guess for now we can just brood over it. Realistically, we can’t do anything.”

I elbowed him in the ribs. “Sleeping poison.”

He laughed, his deep, thick chuckle. It was joined by his actual smile, the one which he rarely used. It was always smirking or blank face. His smile was just so beautiful. “We can discuss it over dinner.” He grabbed my hand, kissing each knuckle. “Tomorrow, six. I’ll be here-“

“Or be queer.”

We both stood in silence to mourn the horrendousness of my joke.

“Hopefully, by then, you’ll have thought of better material.” He turned on his heel, looking back over his shoulder at me. “Don’t bother wearing anything super fancy, I know you can’t afford it anyway.”

He was so lucky he started walking his smug ass away, cause if he had stayed a second longer I would have leapt onto his back and made him eat this shitty apartment hallway’s three-dollar-a-yard carpet.

I huffed opening up the door and closing it behind me, well, slightly slamming it behind me. I stayed there for a second, leaning against the wood, trying not to smile at myself. It had gone the exact opposite of what I had been expecting but I guess I couldn’t complain since Sasuke was actually taking my feeling into consideration. Which was weird. Maybe Itachi hit him hard enough that he hit his head again, and got his sense back.

Either way, I was stupidly glad.

Going on a date with Sasuke.

Nothing could burst a bubble in my good mood.

“You know, you really should apologize for what you said to me in your bedroom.” Sai said as he walked out of the kitchen, Red Bull in hand. He was smiling at me, taking a sip of his drink. “I’d like it written and dropped into my room no later than Monday, please. Two hundred words, double spaced, Times New Roman, size twelve.” He stopped in front of me, patting me on the cheek. “Oh and I do know what I’m talking about. The SasuNaru OTP will never die.”

He shut his bedroom door. And the sound that his door made would be the exact same as the sound his casket would make as I shut him into it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sasuke and Naruto finally get to go on their date. But it isn't everything they expect and hope it'll be....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wish I had a better excuse for why this chapter took so long...But I've been really busy and having some really weird laptop issues that took me way too long to fix...but that's honestly the best i can say. I do go to college full time so I don't exactly how the most free time and since I have multiple stories all going at once...It does make things a tad-bit more difficult.   
> I hope you guys can forgive me for sucking this bad.  
> But such is life.

I’m going to vomit everywhere.

Nervousness chewed and desecrated my gut, filling it with carnivorous butterflies. I stared at myself in the mirror, noting the sweat beading up on my forehead. Suddenly, I felt incredibly foolish, even though I know there’s some sense of justification for it…Somewhere in my mind. I don’t know. It’s kind of like I completely misplaced my normal thought process in some dark alley by my apartment and I can’t find it anymore.

I opened and leaned out of the bathroom door, “Sai!”

He stepped out into the doorway of his room, leaning out to greet me. “Hey, sweaty.”

“Am I pretty?”

“Objectively or subjectively?”

“Either.”

“Sasuke is prettier than you in both accounts.”

“WHAT?! Subjectivity is based on opinion! _Your_ opinion!” I accused, pointing and sending a nasty look his way.

“Dude, Naruto, Sasuke is hot. The Uchiha blood in him makes him almost _too_ hot; hot damn. No offense, of course.” Sai just shrugged at me, like I’m not going to save that in the old vault. Like all of Sai’s other comments that I have yet to do anything about. But I’m cooking something up, he’ll experience the wrath all at once. “Did you want me to lie?” 

I rolled my eyes. “I don’t know why I even bother to ask you anything.”

“Do you want me to give you a pep talk?”

I raised an eyebrow at him. “Sure, go for it.”

“Here are your goals for tonight: Don’t blow it, blow him.” I don’t know if I was more annoyed by the fact that he even called those goals, or that he gave me a fucking thumbs up when he was done talking. Honestly, why did I talk to him? Why did I purposefully torture myself by saying more than a word to this person?

“Sai, that’s not a- you know what, never mind.” I sighed through my nose, shaking my head. “Thank you, Sai.” 

“Yep.” He closed his door and I let out a sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose.

I needed to start leaving notes for myself around the house so I’ll remember never to talk to him again. Sai’s ‘before date’ advice was worse than I could even properly describe. But, of course, with the whole ‘shipping’ business, he was going to just give me sexual innuendos and tell me to just go with it…

Though, in reality I knew this date wasn’t even a big deal. I shouldn’t be freaking out about this at all. I don’t even know why I was panicking. This was not my first date, nor was it my first date with Sasuke.

So…What’s changed?

I’m fairly certain I’ve stayed mostly the same throughout the years.

And from what I’ve gathered, Sasuke hasn’t changed either. He still acts the same, still smirks the same, still has the better comebacks, and still can make me laugh just as hard. Then why? Why do I feel like I’m going to vomit on the floor and cancel our date and then sit in my room sulking, watching Netflix for the rest of the night?

What am I so afraid of? It’s just Sasuke, someone I’ve cared for deeply for a very long time…and who has asked me to marry him… and if all goes well on his date…

I stopped myself from passing into that dangerous territory. As much as the proposal made me sick, it also made me feel like I’d be hit by Cupid’s arrow all over again. It resurrected a variety of feelings I haven’t felt since High school, and I don’t know if that’s necessarily a good thing. I keep telling myself that moving on from Sasuke is the best thing I can do; that I _should_ do it. It is the most adult thing I can do, I’m sure. But then he keeps showing up, all sexy and funny with that dumb hairstyle that he totally rocks…

Again, I had to stop myself. He made my brain feel weird, always a second or so away from overheating. It was supposed to be my reliable organ since I couldn’t trust my heart when it came to these matters. All it said was ‘do it’ and honestly that’s not very good advice; there are two possible situations I could use that advice in, so, the instructions were incredibly poor. But my brain felt muffled whenever Sasuke and I shared space; he distracted me, made me forget about all of my resolve to be an adult. In those moments, he was all I wanted. All I wanted to hear, to see, to touch. I just wanted to drown in everything that was him.

I sighed, leaning my weight onto the bathroom sink. Maybe I was being foolish. Every single time I got caught up in Sasuke, it felt like there’s no other correct feeling but to let my heart explode with the hope we will be together again. Isn’t that why I agreed to this date? Because I’m still hopeful that something will happen for us?

But then what about my hurt, my other emotions? A darker part of me wants to crush his heart under my foot; stomp it until it was just as fractured and destroyed as I felt when he left. Though, I’m not sure if that’s just me being childish or not. It’s not like I wouldn’t have done the same thing in his situation; an opportunity arouse and he had to take it. People’s lives progress even when others’ are seemingly stuck at a standstill. And some people, like me, can’t keep pace.

I’m not saying I could have done something different to make Sasuke and my future coincide to the point where I could have been at that Ivy with him. He was a phenomenal student, he was president of like a million clubs, did non-profit charity work, and still made time for me…Whenever I really needed him.

But it still hurt so badly when he left. 

Then, even though he took his damn sweet time, he came back…

To marry me…

That has to mean something, right?

Maybe I was as big of an idiot as everyone said.

I turned when I heard a knock on the door, Sai blasting out of his room. “SASUKE’S HERE.”

Before Sai could even make it into the living room, I pulled him back by his shirt. And then we engaged in the greatest struggle known to man-kind; who will open the door first. He pushed against my face, trying to rip away from me. But I held firm, knowing that if Sai opened the door, all he would do was embarrass me and I didn’t need Sai to do that; I was perfectly capable of doing it myself.

“Sai, this is _my_ date. Back off.”

“I know that’s why I have to open the door.” Sai said. I paused and we mostly disentangled. I still had a fist in his shirt in case he just decided to screw reasoning with me and run for it, which, I believed him fully capable of doing. “Alright, hear me out. If I open the door, it’ll make you seem way more nonchalant about this and way more cool.”

I considered this point when I heard someone clearing their throat in front of us. Someone I knew very well, almost too well. Both Sai and I looked towards the noise and I could feel the hot flash of embarrassment covering my face. Sai was smiling widely, disentangling himself from me and me from him. We both laughed a little as Sasuke smirked at us. “Sorry for ruining your plan, but your door wasn’t locked.”

“Sai, dude, there’s a sticky note by the key rack for a reason!” I scolded, leaning into the raven’s face.

“Oops.” He smiled sweetly at me. Quickly, and I think to slightly annoy me, he ran a hand through my hair and straightened up my shirt, giving me a thumbs up when he was finished. “Remember the mantra for tonight: Don’t blow it, b-“

“DON’T SAY IT!” I was probably about two steps away from being able to properly strangle Sai. I guess he thought I was going in for a hug. I just stared at his head as he squeezed me, and still continued to fix my outfit. I knew I already looked good, his fidgeting and fixing made me nervous! And of course, all the while Sasuke is just standing in our apartment, smirking at us. Could this evening begin any worse? Seriously, could it?

“Mommy Sai is so proud of you baby.”

“Sai!” He pulled away from me, smiling before turning away from us and heading back into his room. But of course, as per usual, he doesn’t end it right there. He gave me, yet another, fucking thumbs up.

“Well, now that that lunacy is over, are you ready to go?” Sasuke smirked at me, holding out his hand to me.

“Wait, will you guys let me take a picture of this for my blog?” Sai popped back into the living room, iPhone trained on us.

“OUT, NOW.” I grabbed onto Sasuke hand, non-to-delicately and started to drag him out of my apartment, hearing the snapping of Sai’s shutter all the while. I reached for my windbreaker and made damn sure to slam the door behind us, effective creating a wooden barrier between us and that picture taking psychopath. I bet he could just piss himself, he’s so excited.

Sasuke chuckled as I continued to lead us down through my complex, muttering about Sai’s eventual murder. This was also going in the vault. “He’s almost as bad as Itachi.”

I turned my head, frowning. “Almost? I don’t think so. This is rivaling Itachi.”

“No, Itachi is worse. Remember? He followed us all the way to prom to make sure he could get a good picture while we didn’t know.”

“I will admit it was a good candid shot.”

“Don’t tell him that.” Sasuke replied, frowning. “He’ll keep doing it if we encourage him.”

“I feel like Itachi is wasting his potential as a college professor. I mean he’d probably be the best private detective in the world.”

Sasuke scoffed, shaking his head. “No way. He’d only follow us around.”

“Why do people do that?”

“What?”

“Stalk us, religiously.”

Sasuke considered this for a moment, and finally, shrugged. “Itachi does it mostly because he thinks it’s funny. And I also believe he thinks he’s playing matchmaker.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Shouldn’t he not being creepily following us around then?”

“I believe his logic is that anyone who breaks up with me because of him never really cared about me in the first place.”

I frowned. “So…Itachi is doing this for your benefit?”

“But also because he thinks it’s funny.”

“I can’t tell if your brother is evil or not.”

“Well, you’re the one who deals with archetypes and tropes, right?”

I blew out a laugh. “Okay, if you want me to write a thesis about your brother, I’m going to need a transcription of everything he’s ever said and text to base and ground an argument, sir. Freud might be a good critic to use.”

Sasuke snorted slightly, giving me a weird look. “Freud, really?”

“Who else am I supposed to use? Genette? Freud totally works because Itachi kinda got ze unheimlich going on.”  

“Firstly,” Sasuke began, jumbling down the stairs behind me. “that was probably the worst fake German accent I’ve ever heard. And secondly, are you saying my brother has a brother complex?”

I glanced over my shoulder at Sasuke, letting him catch up to me. After we get off the stairs leading to the car garage, he put his arm around my shoulders, holding me close to him. He rested his head on top of my own as we walked. Heat was rising in my cheeks at his closeness and the suddenness of our intimacy. I haven’t been this romantically entangled with Sasuke in a very long time. It’s a lot different than when you’re drunkenly making up with someone on the floor of your room. This is far more embarrassing, there’s far more at stake if you mess it up.

“I was thinking more uncanny than anything else. But I don’t doubt Freud probably would have had a fucking field day trying to psychoanalyze Itachi. He probably could have related any of Itachi’s behavior to castration or dicks somehow.” I said, unconsciously reaching up to grab the hand draped over my shoulder. His fingers wrapped in mine, squeezing them gently. My heart started to race. “But more to the point, Freud wrote about the uncanny feeling you get from realism, like when realism goes surreal. So, like, I could easily write a thesis about how Itachi himself is very uncanny, based on the ground of his definitions. But you cannot deny Itachi is a little supernatural, like a fucking Sherlock Holmes that decided to investigate us instead of something productive.”

Sasuke snorted out a laugh. “I think you’re involving too much in this thesis.”

“You’re right, fuck it then.” We arrived at what I assumed to be Itachi’s borrowed car, knowing Sasuke probably hadn’t gotten his own yet. He unlocked it with a click of the button and I gently threw myself into the passenger’s side. “So, where are we going?”  

Sasuke straightened, clearing his throat. “Alright so I’m thinking we say fuck Seattle and head down I-5 into Federal Way to keep us safe.”

“Sasuke, Federal Way is a forty-five minute drive from here.”

“I know, that’s why it’s safe.”

I blinked at him. “You wanna just go to U:Don and get Niku udon?”

Sasuke sent me a slightly unpleased look, making me bite my lip to keep from laughing.  “I had a plan.”

I smiled at him, shaking my head. Patting him on the shoulder, I couldn’t help but laugh a little. “And it was a stupid plan.” He turned his head towards me, frowning. I leaned over and gave him a kiss. “Oh come on Teme. If we drove all the way to Federal Way, ate, and then came back, we’d be too tired for sex.” I paused when I said that, not sure where it came from. Apparently I was so hard up for some sinful loving that I was just able to fucking suggest it without even so much as an afterthought.

“You make a compelling argument.”

“Rhetoric was always my strong suit.” Sasuke’s eyes darkened as he looked at me. I guess the urge was mutual. For me to suggest it, however, must have surprised him. I actually had no idea how much he wanted us to slow down. Well, I actually did not need to slow down at all; I was the one who, surprisingly for me, kept the level head about this. He was the one who really needed to halt his over-zealous ass considering, in proper discourse, dates tended to supersede a walk down the aisle. However, that did not mean sex was not on the table for us.

We didn’t that long after started dating to have sex anyway, so why spoil that speed?  
\---

“It smells so good.” I could feel the drool starting to build up in my mouth as Sasuke and I sat down. Luckily for us, even though it was slightly crowded, there was still a small two-person table available for us to have our own little time together.

“Can I ask a weird question?” Uh-oh, whenever someone starts any conversation with this kind of inquiry its going to get awkward and weird within the blink of an eye.

I smiled nervously at Sasuke. “Go ahead.”

“Why the fuck do you live with Sai?”

“Why the fuck do you live with Itachi?”

“Necessity is a little different when you subject yourself to insanity.”

 I shrugged. “Even though Sai is insane, he’s still my friend. Sometimes I have to remind myself that but I mean, he isn’t super hard to get along with unless he’s in one of his weird moods. You can tell he was home-schooled.”

Sasuke nodded. “How did you meet?”

“I met him at Highline. I was still experiment with classes and we took Psych one-o-one together, he was the only reason I got a decent grade. I was really bad at remembering the material but he studied with me anyway. Then one day we were talking about moving out of our parents’ houses and we decided it would be okay to live together. And I’ve lived with him for six years and he isn’t dead yet so that must mean something.”

I felt hesitant and then blurted out, “But we didn’t date or anything until later.”

“Yeah I know.”

“Wait, what do you mean?” My eye narrowed on their own, all the muscles in my legs and back tightening. “Did Itachi tell you?”

“He didn’t have to.” Sasuke said with a shrug, wiping his mouth with a napkin as he spoke. “Itachi and Sai set up a little encounter for me to ‘overhear’ Gaara and Sai talking about your relationships.”

I stared at him, my mouth hanging open slightly. “Are you fucking serious?” The rage was bubbling under my surface and it was gunna erupt so badly when I saw that shitty Sai later. I was gunna kill him. I was going to tell Sasuke about us, but he didn’t need to know right away. “Oh I’m a little heated about that.”

Sasuke shrugged, a little more rigidly than a person who ‘didn’t care’ would have. “I mean, I was going to tell you Sasuke, but I didn’t think it was super important. Sai and I broke up for a reason and I don’t love him. Not like that. I learned that when I dated him.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me, obviously if you and Sai were still dating, or if you still had feelings for him, this moment wouldn’t exactly be happening, now would it?”

“What else did you overhear?”

Sasuke breathed through his nose, eyes shining with an emotion that made me shiver. It was half-way between rage and possessive jealousy. He frowned, “I heard about Gaara too.”

I looked up at the ceiling, praying for a moment, so that Jesus would give me the strength to not get up from his table, run back to my apartment, and kill Sai. How could he and Itachi plan something like that? This is _my_ personal business, damn it! 

“Hey, it’s okay. Don’t get salty because of the powers at be.”

“I don’t like people spreading my personal business like that. I was going to tell you, I just thought now wouldn’t exactly be the greatest time.” 

Sasuke shrugged, reaching across the table to grab my hand. His hand was warm on mine and I felt a soothing calmness filling me. Sasuke may have had that flare of jealousy but he wasn’t going into the gritty details or grilling me about it; he probably was just as annoyed about what they said as I was. I took a deep breath through my nose. “Well, we should start eating before it gets cold…”

The rumble surrounded us as we dug in, not having to necessarily say anything to each other. I knew there would come a point where we would sit down and talk about this mess, but for now I had udon and I didn’t want to do anything else but stuff my face with it.

I needed to fight back my incredible urge to be the most awkward person alive. The anger had cooled but it had scrambled any means of making decent conversation. So that meant I’d probably keep babbling incoherently until Sasuke responded. Yep, it was definitely the best way to approach any situation. “So, uh, like…” Wow, how was it that I was going to get that associate professor job when I couldn’t even form an actual sentence?

“Thinking has never particularly been your strong suit.”

“First of all, being a dick has always been yours, and secondly, eat my entire ass.” Sasuke smirked at that final comment, wiggling his eyebrows at me.

“That was the goal.”

“Sasuke!” I could the flush creeping up into my face and a strike of electricity nestling itself in my groin. Now was not the time for bedroom talk. Not in the presence of delicious udon! He smirked at me, in that way that reminded me of past activities. His eyes were shining brightly, dangerously wicked. It was weird seeing that confident, aroused face when it wasn’t looking down at me. I shivered from the thought, not wanting to drift down that particular memory lane. Not right now, anyway.

“What are you going to do after grad school?” Sasuke said, pushing around the noodles in his bowl. For him to fidget was very rare. And I knew from many, many years of studying Uchiha as a second language that this was a sign he was feeling nervous but unaware of how to approach a topic. And like most people, even though his may be a rare exception for Sasuke, due to his usual straight-forward manner, he decided to make small talk. Chat me up to a point where my disposition towards him was at a higher standing.

I swallowed the food in my mouth. “I applied for an assistant professor position with the head of the department. I’d be working with him and probably be doing most of his work for him. If I hadn’t taken any classes with him, I would be shocked that he was the head.” I wiped my mouth on a napkin, shrugging as I did so. “He’s damn brilliant but fuck I thought I was really lazy; he puts me to shame. The epitome of laziness. It astounds me.”

“Do you want me to ask Itachi to pull a string or two?”

“Um, no thanks.” I leaned across the table, staring as seriously as I could. “I’d rather not be forever in debt to your brother. I remember when he used to tutor me and made me do horrible things afterwards.” Ah yes, the winter of junior year when I was totally failing math and I thought Itachi, out of the kindness of his black little heart, was generously offering to tutor me. And I ended up doing six months of chores and errands for him. I mean, to Itachi’s credit, I did pass with the highest grade in the class but I suffered for that victory. “Instead of ‘Here is all my laundry’ it would be ‘hide this body for me’.”

Sasuke snorted. “He wouldn’t trust you with that kind of job, he’d definitely make me help you.”

“Nothing says ‘romance’ more like dropping a body into Puget Sound. We could watch the seals as we dragged him into the water.”

“The starlight would bathe our accessory after the fact so perfectly. We could get ice cream and consider which state to move to.”

“You don’t even like ice cream.” I replied. “Besides that, we should hop countries. Get a passport and get out of dodge. I am not getting busted with a felony without covering my ass. Canada would be nice, the people are friendly.”

“We could train a moose to protect our love nest from the Mounties as they tried to bring us back for trial.” Unprepared for any response like that, I choked on the noodles as I tried desperately to swallow them. “Well maybe if the evening continues like that I may have to hide _your_ body.”

“Oh shut up, how was I supposed to be prepared for that?”

“That’s a pretty typical Canadian stereotype.”

“Is it bad that we’re planning for when your brother kills someone?”

“Hn, no way. It’s best to be prepared for every situation.” Sasuke said with a smirk. “But I also think that Itachi would cover his ass so well that we wouldn’t even know if he killed someone.”

“See? Uncanny. I’m still proving that thesis from earlier.”

Sasuke chuckled lightly, shaking his head. “Fine, I accept this as evidence.”

I smiled triumphantly and Sasuke rolled his eyes, smirking gently. He turned his head to look at me fully, our eyes meeting. My heartbeat jumped up a few notices as I looked into that face, knowing he was happy. I felt heat sinking into my face at the sudden swing of intimacy at the look he gave me. My heart was thundering even more now, that recurring wave of nervousness hitting me.

“So what about you? I doubt you want to teach for the rest of your life.”

Sasuke shrugged. “Research probably, or see if I could get a job somewhere. I’d make decent money either way, but I think I’d rather do research for the university.”

“Really? Why would you rather do research? I hated doing research, it was always such a bore.”

Sasuke looked up at me with a smirk. “Well, I’m pretty sure research in our departments are done very differently. I'd be in a position of testing theories and making advancements in a field. Lots of lab work, which is fine, I don’t mind the lab work. Sometimes it’s fun. Well, as fun as observation and note taking can be.” Sasuke took a sip of his drink, shrugging his shoulder. “I mean, I have taken some English classes and I feel like proving and, or, providing evidence for English theories would be significantly harder and more tedious.”

“Can’t argue with you there.” I said swallowing the food in my mouth. “I did research for my senior capstone about how culture influences how we read texts, and it was probably both the most time consuming and tedious thing I’ve ever done. My professor warned me but I didn’t listen. However, my theory did get published so I can’t exactly complain.”   

“You never told me you were published.”

I shrugged. “I dunno, I thought maybe you’d think it was boring or that you’d be busy to read it. I mean you do have a life outside of me…”

Sasuke opened and shut his mouth, his lips working themselves into a thin line. He obviously wanted to say something to contradict me but he didn’t want to start a fight with me. And honestly his hesitant approach this this entire situation is starting to annoy me. I liked Sasuke better when he wasn’t afraid say anything to me, didn’t mind calling me out on my bullshit, knew that I wasn’t a crystalline structure that couldn’t take a blow. It was why I loved him; he wasn’t afraid to combat me. This hesitant bullshit isn’t like him at all.

What was he really afraid of? That this is too public of a place for feelings? That we’re on two different brain signals and that we may actually have lost what we had? Because I’m here aren’t I? Risking it all for the chance that we could make our lives into something more than they are currently. I massaged my temple and let out a sigh, giving him a little stink eye. He frowned at the look.

“Just say what you want to say to me, Sasuke. It gets annoying when you hold back like this.”

Sasuke crossed his arm, leaning back. “How am I supposed to do that when you had such a violent reaction the last time?”

My eyes narrowed. I’m pretty sure anyone in my situation would have had a violent reaction to his bullshit. You just don’t do what he did. I mean, yes, I did feel like I was on top of the world when I saw that little ring in the box, knowing that ultimately, I had won. But there was also the nauseated feeling of invalidation, that my emotions were not valid to him and I could forget the depression and anger just because he wanted me too.  

 I felt my pocket vibrating and I reached down, pulling out my phone. It was Iruka. I ignored the call and sent him a quick text message. I’d call later, now wasn’t exactly the best time to receive a lecture about something. “Sorry, it was Iruka.”

He smiled at me, breaking the tension. Relief flooded me for some reason. “I haven’t seen Iruka in forever, we should go visit him.” Sasuke looked calm, his gaze not falling from my face as I placed my phone back into my pocket. I was a little stunned by his statement. Not only was it a promise that we’d be doing more now that he was back. But that these things we’d be doing, together, would be in a mutualism; that we would be enjoying things in the same ways with similar activities of our past.  

“Yeah, he definitely like that. He’d be so happy to see you’re back.”

Sasuke nodded his head. “Yeah, he called me a lot so I don’t doubt it.”

“Wait, wait, back-peddle that thought for a second. Iruka called you when you were away?” This was the first I’d ever heard about of it.

Sasuke blinked. “I’m surprised he didn’t tell you. He called me once a month, you know, just to check in, see how I was. If eating properly, getting enough sleep, the works. He actually called me more than my actual parents did. I mean, I was more happy when he called than my parents because he wouldn’t criticize me with every word. It was nice. He’s a little too mother-hen but that was the Iruka I knew the best. Sometimes he’d talk to me about you and what you were doing, ask if we kept in contact, ask if I was coming back soon…”

I let a breath out through my nose. ‘When are you coming back’ was never the question I asked Sasuke because I just didn’t want to face the reality where Sasuke said he never would. It was a strange situation to live in where you felt so emotionally close to someone but had to keep yourself at an arm’s length to suppress the hurt.

I tried my best to smile but I could feel my face fighting with me. Sasuke noticed but didn’t both saying anything about it knowing I was probably struggling with my own thoughts. He was always good at reading people’s struggles and I was one of those people. “You know, you never did exactly tell me why you came back.” I said, trying to change the subject.

He let out an annoyed sigh. “Where do I even start? Throughout my entire academic career, I had a lot of issues with the personal side of my life. I believe you are familiar with the fan-girls and the light stalking?” I nodded my head understandingly. It had been an issue when we were in high school so it wasn’t particularly shocking that Sasuke would encounter the same issues in college. When we dated, I actually had a slight following both out of envy and I guess just because; it was actually really weird and scary. But at the same time, kind of cool. Some of the girls were so nice. “Anyway, one of my professors was stalking me.”

“What?”

“Yeah.”

“I bet if you told Itachi, he would have taken care of it.”

“He was stalking me because of Itachi.”

“Was he stupid?”

“I really think he was.”

My brain literally could not process this thought. I mean I guess Itachi is a pretty interesting person himself, he’s pretty funny when he isn’t a maniacal genius and ruining your life. But stalking his little brother because you’re interested in the older one? That’s like the most backwards thing I’ve ever heard. They are not the same person nor would they probably ever be. “Okay can you like…explain this to me more because I’m so messed up with how backwards this person is that I’m confused.”

“Honestly, it had me kind of fucked up for a while. Like…Who does that?” It was actually rare to get Sasuke talking so much, so I was soaking it up. He usually just had some quick jab remark or like a word of input but because this was rare I knew it must have been bugging him like nobody’s business. He generally kept complaints to himself so this had been boiling under the surface for a while. “So apparently Itachi had met Orochimaru- that was my professor- at some kind of conference and he was like super dazzled by my brother. He even offered Itachi some kind of partnership and Itachi was like ‘eat it, scrub’-what?”

“I’m sorry but I’m trying to picture Itachi saying ‘eat it, scrub’ and it’s just…” I held my hand over my mouth trying to contain the laughter. Itachi would never say anything that stupid, ever. It would be beneath him as an Uchiha; the fact alone Sasuke had said it was at least worth five minutes of laughter. But Itachi? I don’t know if I would have the strength to live if I saw that in person. “It makes him sound like some kind of troll in the youtube comment section and it’s so funny.”

Sasuke shook his head, chuckling at the ridiculousness. “Now I’m going to have to see Itachi later and that’s going to be the only thing I’ll think about.”

“I’m sorry,” I said through my laughs. “Continue, please.”

After a moment of us laughing, Sasuke finally finds his composure. “Okay, so in my second year I met Orochimaru because he was my Bio professor. I should have known I was gunna have problems with him because, literally, the first day of class, he reads my name off the list and just stares at me, smirking. But I ignored it because I had already done research with other professors, so I just thought that was how he knew my name. So the quarter progressed and right before the final, he sent me an email being like ‘oh Sasuke, come to my office we have something I need to discuss with you’.” I felt my back shiver when Sasuke implemented a raspy, super creepy voice.

“Ew, does he actually talk like that?”

Sasuke nodded, “I can’t make this up, if you ever doubt me, ask Itachi. He will confirm. It’s really weird. Anyway, I go to his office and he starts spouting off all this nonsense about potential and that I have a lot and I have the highest grades, blah, blah, blah. He was just kissing my ass, really. And then he propositioned me.”

“He didn’t…”

“He did. Mind you, he’s older than my dad and he was not afraid of asking me to bone him. It was probably both the most awkward and grossest moment of my life. So then I just turned around and left, I didn’t even give him an answer. I was done. There was no way I was going to subject myself to more of that bullshit.” Sasuke smirked at me, probably because I had been making a grossed out face the entire time I was listening. But seriously though, why do people think this is okay behavior? Especially since he was a professional environment.

“You really should have reported him, Sasuke. Sexual abuse on college campuses is a real problem.”

“If he dropped my grade, I would have. He didn’t threaten me or anything if I didn’t do it, so I think he just testing his luck. But I thought I embarrassed him enough to where he just wanted to un-live the encounter entirely.”

“Lemme guess, you were wrong.”

“It would be so much easier if people gave up after the first rejection.” Sasuke shook his head. I wanted to point out the irony in his statement but he managed to get me on this date so obviously perseverance does work sometimes. “Anyway, I go through the rest of my school, no problems really from Orochimaru. Aside from when I _had_ to take classes with him and he just longingly stare at me during exams.”

“I don't know why but I have this picture in my head and I got the willies from it. So gross.”

Sasuke nodded. “Welcome to my life.” He breathed out his mouth, folding his hands. “Then grad school happened. He was my advising professor, which, according to TAs and other professors I talked to, was weird because he generally did research instead of working with graduate students. Like he taught undergrad and worked with doctors, so he specifically made sure that he was my professor. “

“How do you know that for sure?”

“Because he had a doctorate in biology; he only had a masters in engineering. So this was out of his zone of teaching. And he also told me it was a ‘strange’ coincidence that he would be teaching me again, and winked. So it’s a little suspicious.” 

“God, the amount he wanted your ass astounds me.”

Sasuke rolled his eyes. “If it was too impress me, I wasn’t.”

“And you dealt with that for three years? Why the fuck did you wait to transfer?”

Sasuke’s posture straightened. I knew that fucking back straightening bullshit anywhere. It was his angry, about to argue posture. And that meant he was about to say something that was going to piss me off. I took a deep breath to prepare myself for the oncoming anger. “Because I’m fucking idiot.” I felt myself slump at the statement. “I was so uncomfortable but I was getting so much research and job experience that I thought I could just grind through my misery with the hope I could get through the program in less than two years.” Sasuke leaned forward slightly, resting his elbow on the table and massaging the bridge of his nose. “But I kept getting stuck TA-ing for Orochimaru and other professors that I had to slow myself down because it’s valuable experience. But I just…”

Sasuke went silent looking up at me, our eyes met. I think in that moment my goddamn heart skipped a beat because the sincerity and just the serene beauty of his face lured me in. He grabbed my hand, winding our fingers together. “One day, I hit an all time low. Just had a bad day and I was so...Depressed. And then you texted me, asking me how I was….And…I just realized how much I missed you. And how much being away from you when I really wanted to see you, just…It hurt.”

No. Goddam it, Naruto pull yourself together. My heart was racing, I could feel it pounding so hard in my ears and I knew we were getting into the territory where this could no longer be a private. My hand shook in his but he only grasped tighter. “I realized I had been keeping myself away from you…From everyone. And that why I was so…Fucking depressed. ‘Cause I still loved you, so much. It didn’t matter how long I’d been away or the people I slept with. They didn’t make me feel better. But I knew, I’d have to bid my time and wait it out until I could come back. I had already re-applied for UW by that point, praying I’d get a sp-“

“Wait, what? You _re-applied_? You applied to UW before? When?” A sudden rush of hot adrenaline filled my blood, breaking whatever fucking cloud I was on before. Sasuke’s face revealed it all to me, the stunned silence said more than he ever could. “You…You applied for grad school at UW, didn’t you? There’s no fucking way you wouldn’t get in, not with your track record. Why…Why wouldn’t you…” Why wouldn’t you come back for me sooner? The selfishness of my own internal voice crushed me with the realization.

“You weren’t even single when I applied!”

“Oh? So that’s _my_ fault?!” And here, this is the point where it all comes to a head, my darker, angry feeling spilling out before I could properly hear him out. Not like I wanted to, anyway. I just felt so…Abandoned. He could been here three years ago but chose not to…To fucking suffer in a place he hated, for what? Experience?!? What kind of backwards bullshit is that?! What price did people actually put on happiness that they would go through years of bullshit for?

“I’m not a home-wrecker, Dobe.”

I blinked at him like he had just said the stupidest thing in the world to me. “Sorry that I trying to fill a fucking void in my goddamn heart from when you left.” The hot burning in my eyes made me feel so weak and vulnerable that I had to hold myself, wrapping my arms around my chest tightly. “Like I really would have stayed with goddamn, obsessive ass, crazy guy when I could have had _you_. The man of my fucking dreams, the man I cried over for years…If you had just come waltzing back into Seattle, like I _always_ fucking hoped...I…I…” I stood up, suddenly, rocking the table with how quickly I got up. My knee burned from where I smacked it into the solid plastic, but I ignored the pain, rushing quickly for the door.  

“Naruto.” I could hear him behind me, knowing he had gotten up too. But I couldn’t force myself to look back at him, not like this. I pushed through the glass door, trying to put any distance I could between us. I felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest with the burning. I knew it was a delusional dream to think that Sasuke and I could go back. That everything could be forgotten and ignored but in actuality we’re both to selfish and stupid to let go of what were are and could even begin to love each in the self-less way healthy people could. “ _Naruto_!”  

He pulled me back so hard I almost fell backwards. I was struggling to breathe properly because of the sobs, not knowing when I had started crying. “F-fuck you, Sasuke.” I pulled my arm away from him. He tried to move closer, tried trapping me with his body. A sick part of me wanted him to hold me, just tell me it would all be okay and that it would be different; that he was sorry and he was different and we could just be happy. But I knew that dream, that idea of what I wanted from his was just something that would only exist in my head.

“I know I fucked up.” Sasuke tried to keep me with him, he was trying but I don’t know if it’s enough. “I love you. I do, I know that now. I’m so sorry, I never thought it would be like this.”

“Oh yeah, of course not. Because you thought that by putting enough distance between us that you could j-just fucking forget me. You shithead, you complete fucking bastard.” I put my hand to my head, trying to keep the tears in; I was weak. I’m so fucking weak. “Why do I…”

“What…?”

“Why do I always have to cry over you?” I threw my arms into the air, slamming them down at my side, suddenly breathless. “I love you…I love you _so fucking much_ but it always hurts _me_. Do you even care about I feel? _How I felt_?! You tossed me aside and left me with so much hope that there would be something for me with you…But I don’t think I can…I can’t do this anymore, Sasuke.”

I stormed off, not caring or looking to see if Sasuke was following me. I needed to be alone now; the thought that he would try to continue to speak with me made me absolutely sick. I’ve reached my limit. There was no more Sasuke for me. His presence was always too bright, too blinding; I could never see around it….

\----

Sasuke plopped himself down in Itachi’s car, silent as he sat in the darkness of the vehicle. His heart was racing and his eyes were burning with tears he’d never shed. “Fuck…. _Fuck. GOD-FUCKING-DAMMIT.”_ Sasuke slammed his balled fists into the steering wheel.

“Watch the interior, Otouto.” Itachi said appearing from the back seat. Sasuke almost screamed, reaching for the pepper spray in his pocket. He almost sprayed Itachi for the hell of it, to teach him not to use this mysticism Itachi apparently possessed.

Itachi leaned from the backseat so he was looking at Sasuke, arms draped over the seats. “You almost just got pepper sprayed, you asshole!”

Itachi rolled his eyes. “Sasuke, mother and father did not put you in karate just so you could pepper spray someone. What a waste of talent.”  

“Why are you here? Is this some kind of divine punishment?”

“I was bar-hopping with Kisame and I saw my car so I thought it would be fun to see if I could scare you both.” Itachi slid so that he was making his way into the passenger seat, which he did with finesse and grace, not even making it seem as though it could have been a struggle. “But, obviously, things are not well…”

“I blew it, Itachi.” Sasuke said in a dire tone, not looking his brother in the face. “I…I can’t fix this.”

Itachi nodded his head understandingly. “Finally, a breakthrough.”

“This isn’t…” Sasuke stopped himself feeling the tears he promised himself he wouldn’t shed falling down his cheeks. “I…”

“Oh, boy.” Itachi let out a sigh, running a hand through his brother’s hair, shaking his head. “You’re breaking so many Uchiha vows in this moment.”

Sasuke frowned, making a move to get out of the car. “I don’t need this right now.”

Itachi grabbed his arm, forcing him to stay in place. He was smirking. “Oh Otouto, this is why you never should have believed you could do this on your own.” Sasuke looked confused as Itachi pulled out his phone. “For now, let Aniki handle it.”

“You’re not calling a hit on Naruto, are you?”

Itachi raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. “Is that what you want?”

“No, it was a joke. Do you actually know a hitman?”

“Perhaps it is better you don’t ask complicated questions when you can’t handle the answers.” Itachi said with a forced smile.

Sasuke shook his head. “It’s over, Itachi. Naruto said he loves me, but I really fucked it.”

The older Uchiha shrugged. “Hn. If he said it, it’s not over, Otouto. Sometimes we must wait for the pot to simmer down before we add our ingredients.”

“That was a really bad metaphor.”

“Do you want my help or not?”

Sasuke sighed, wiping his eyes on the back of his hands. “I doubt you could make it worse so…Go for it.”

Itachi smirked, patting Sasuke’s shoulder. “Just relax, love. Let Aniki wash this all away.”  

“Another pow-wow with Sai isn’t going to fix this, Itachi.”

The older Uchiha cupped Sasuke’s face, gently brushing the smooth skin on his brother’s cheek. “I know, that’s why I’m calling in the big guns.”         


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHY DO I ALWAYS DO THIS?? UGH, i wanted to have this chapter done in September. SEP-FUCKING-TEMBER. But NOOOOOOOO I DECIDED TAKING A 300-LEVEL CREATIVE WRITING CLASS WOULD BE FUN AND IT WOULDN'T TAKE UP ALL MY TIME.  
> i learned, anyway...Sorry for the wait, the next chapter will officially be the final chapter. I know, we're all going to cry. Especially me. Enjoy.

 “Naruto.” I looked over at Sai as he leaned on the back of the couch, pulling at the blankets covering my head. He was frowning at me, obviously not pleased with my current behavior. But I mean, hey, I’m an adult and if I wanna sit in my most comfortable blanket on the couch, marathoning shows on Netflix and being sad, then I should be allowed to do it. I swatted his hand, burying myself deeper in the blanket. “Naruto, come on. Just call and talk to him.”

“Why should I?” I complained, looking out of the small hole in the blanket.

“Because you two are seriously suffering from a lack of communication and it’s driving me completely nuts.” Sai replied. He hopped over the back of the couch, nestling next to me. “I mean, yeah, from what you told me, you got some big issues out in the open. But did you stay around to talk to him and really get to the root of the problem? No.”

“Okay, Sai, if you’re so smart and all knowing, what exactly is the root of our problem?”

“Resentment, mostly, on your half. And on Sasuke’s half, well, he’s just an idiot and doesn’t seem like he really understands emotions, especially yours, which leads to a lot of higher expectations without consideration.”

I blinked, thinking about what Sai was saying. Did I resent Sasuke? I mean, I guess I did a little bit for leaving but it wasn’t exactly random. It wasn’t like one day Sasuke wasn’t here anymore. There was a lead up and a fallout, just like expected. So how could I resent someone when it was in the cards the entire time? “I don’t think I resent Sasuke…”

Sai looked at me, blinking slowly and shaking his head. “Okay, if it’s not resentment it’s something else. Come on, Naruto, you’re the only one who knows how you’re feeling. So what are you feeling right now?”

“Sa-Hey, wait a minute! Are you trying to psychoanalyze me?”

“I’m trying to help you.” He retorted. “Talking about your emotions and your problems with someone else can lead to potential solutions.”

I huffed. I don’t really know how I’m feeling right now. Sure, I’m sad because things look bleak for Sasuke and myself. I did blow up on him quite a bit, but considering the circumstance, I felt it more than justified. You just don’t drop a huge bomb like ‘oh yeah, I was going to come back for you, but you were dating someone else so I didn’t’. Nothing is set in stone, considering how Sai and I broke up, Sasuke’s presence may have actually sped it along. “Alright, fine. I’m sad.”

“And why is that?”

“You know _perfectly_ well!”

“Actually, I don’t. If it were me and I was able to express my anger towards Sasuke, I’d feel more relieved and justified in my actions, not sad. If you’re sad then you’re sad about something else, so Naruto, what is it?”

I bit my lip looking down at my fuzzy orange blanket, pulling myself farther into it. I hate to admit it, but Sai is right about this. I was able to say something to Sasuke, vent a little of what I was feeling onto him but it didn’t make me feel any better.

Sai lets out a sigh, “’Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.’”

“The return of the repressed.” I replied. “Thanks Freud.”

“But it’s more than true in this case, right?” Sai’s question posed that perhaps I haven’t particularly done enough introspection about how I’m really feeling about this entire situation. How was I actually feeling about all this? Why was I upset about the thought of this not working? “I mean, when you first saw Sasuke again, you felt anxious, am I wrong?”

“Well, yes, but you can get anxiety from a lot of different things. Not just because your ex is back. He also just so happened to randomly appear in one of my classes like it was nothing.”

Sai gave me a look. “I bet you were actually anxious because you were hoping something would happen between you again and were actually worried it wouldn’t.”

I shrugged. “I guess.”

“You love him.”

I pulled my knees to my chest. “I told him I did, but then why do I _hurt_ so badly? Shouldn’t mutually acknowledged feelings fill you with, I don’t know, relief?”

Sai considered this for a moment. “Your love for him was repressed. And if you think about it, it makes sense that now, when it has finally resurfaced, it’s not the sunshine and rainbows it used to be. It came back ugly because it’s not the same as it was. It’s uncanny, to put it in Freud terms.”

“There’s no way to fix this is there?”

He let out a loud laugh, surprising me. “This isn’t like you at all. Firstly, the only one who can truly decide if anything is over between you guys, is you. And secondly, if you really believe there is something there that is salvageable, I say don’t let it d-“, Sai’s phone started to ring loudly, cutting him off. “Hold on a minute.” He got up from the couch, heading into his room.

I sat there, with my knees still hugged to my chest. I did love Sasuke, I loved him a lot. But ultimately, Sai is right about this…Which is something I will never admit aloud and will never be able to live down. How the fuck can he go from obsessive stalker to comforting friend in two seconds? I shook my head, getting up from the couch.

I needed to digest this.

Heading towards my bedroom, Sai stepped out into the hallway. “Hey, I just got a call from the day-care where I do my research and they need me to step in for one of the caretakers. Do you think you’ll be okay being alone for the next couple hours?”

I raised an eyebrow. “Sai, I’m an adult. It’s not like I’m going to burn down the house if you’re gone. Besides, I have class in a couple hours. If anything I will just eat all the ice cream and ramen.”

“I’ll pick some more up on the way home.” He replied, stepping around me. With a quick wave, he grabbed his coat and shut the door.

I opened the door to my room, heading to my closet and pulling on my fleece under armor, a sweatshirt and my beat to shit cross trainers. I needed time to just think, let myself have an open space where I can literally do nothing but let thoughts assault me. The best way I knew how to do it was to run. I took a deep breath and headed out the door.

After exiting the parking garage, I knew the longest and best path I could take would be to head up to the Ave, then down and around to Pacific, then head back up Pend Oreille to cut through campus. It would be an even longer run with all the pedestrians and the rain, but it would feel good to just have some time to think. As much as I appreciated Sai trying to psychoanalyze me and try to help me figure out how I’m feeling, only I could really put it into words. I needed to think of a comprehensive answer.   

Which meant I needed to figure out exactly how I’m feeling.

If I’m sad, why am I sad? My feet slammed the pavement, hard, as I sprinted through a crosswalk. Rain was misting my hair and face as I pushed through the people heading towards class. Wet leaves still managed to crunch under my feet as I passed by south section of campus in a blur. I had to stop at the crosswalk which would lead to the bus stops by Hitchcock hall and Magnuson Health Sciences building. I took in a deep breath when the light changed, making sure to maneuver around the people stuck in their phones and not paying attention.

I don’t necessarily think I’m as sad as I once was. When Sasuke left, I had a serious case of depression. I didn’t just lose my boyfriend, but my best friend. That was very new for me. But with a little time, I was just as bouncy and happy as I once was. I didn’t drown my sorrows, I just worked through them, knowing that life was strange and full of twists and turns. Some of those turns were sharp and made you scrap your knees when you fell, but you still got right back up after time. They always say your first love shouldn’t be your last love, but I…I can’t help but feel drawn right back into him.

But me being drawn in isn’t the problem, really. As much as I hated Sai being right, he was kinda right about this one. A lot of emotional bullshit came back with Sasuke. And Sasuke was never really superb with heavy emotions. I blamed the cryptic Uchiha bullshit he grew up with for that much. Hell, I’m pretty sure the reason Itachi isn’t in a meaningful relationship at his age is because he’d challenge any potential partner to some kind of riddle challenge to see if they could even begin to understand Uchiha. I can see it now…Him standing under his little bridge and popping up with a list of riddles…

But Sasuke is a little better than Itachi; at least I think. He always seemed less…Smoke and mirrors. He generally used a straight forward manner unless he was hiding something, which wasn’t often. But now, it was like he was caught up in preserving something; what we had.

What we had….

It doesn’t exist anymore.

I slowed to almost a stop in front of the University’s hospital, realizing that our previous relationship’s death never really hit me. I mean, I knew it was over but I guess I never really thought of it as something in the past because I held out so much hope that something would happen…

But once something was dead, no matter how hard you try, it can’t come back to life. I continued at a slower pace, crossing the street in front of Husky Stadium, the wind picking up and carrying the smell of Portage Bay and the exhaust of cars from the freeway through the rain.   

I picked up the pace, the rain doing the same, falling in hard sheets around me. The wind was howling through the trees, cascading leaves through the air and twirling them carelessly. They passed by me threateningly, like a festively colored wash of daggers.

Was that why I was sad?

Because I knew all along what we had was dead?

A bubbling of emotion spread through me, something dark and trying to force tears into my eyes. I swallowed it down, nearly choking on how heavy and large it was. Ignoring the pit opening up in my stomach, I started to run again, blocking out the wave of sadness swelling so harshly in my gut with the burn of my muscles. The environment blurred around me; raindrops hitting my face and exploding in icy little crystals across my skin. But I kept going anyway, I felt the pain in my legs and face, the sting in my lungs but I needed to free my mind of all this now that I’d hit a realization.

By the time I’d reached the top of Pend Oreille, my calves were on fire. It was nearly a straight shot up to campus since it spits you out by Padelford and the old dorms, but that hill was unforgiving. Now, I was not a math major, so I couldn’t say if that damn hill was a ninety-degree incline, but with how much my legs were burning, it sure felt like it.

I slowed down, bent slightly over at the waist as I caught my breath. The sweat on my brow mingled with the rain, now just a fine mist in the air after the downpour a few minutes before. I checked my watch and it was barely nine, still had plenty of time to get home and shower. I crossed the street by the comms building, debating whether or not I should run down to the HUB and backtrack to the Ave. I decided against it, keeping up a fast walk while I recovered my breath.

One step was all it took, just one, just because of a goddamn senior tradition…I felt my foot catch in one of the brick holes in the middle of the Quad, my eyes springing open. “FUCK!” I suppose, luckily for me, I didn’t completely face plant, but I did manage to make my chest meet brick for the first time; that was exciting. The air shot out of my lungs and I coughed hard, rolling onto my side.

“Are you alright?” Something in the back of my mind told me there was something oddly familiar about the way that voice sounded, but I couldn’t place the reasoning. I looked over, an umbrella coming into view as whoever leaned down.

This person wasn’t from Washington. (1)

He wore a decently nice suit, a little more casual without the tie, and offered me a hand. His face was more or less obscured by the umbrella, but I took the hand anyway, thanking him. “My, my, I’ve noticed all the little ‘pot-holes’ around campus, didn’t think they’d actually be so dangerous.”

Did he just make fun of me? I tried my best to smile genuinely, laughing off my fall. “Well it’s also a bit wet outside, isn’t it?”

“Yes, I suppose it is a bit misty. All the more reason to be careful.” There was a laugh in his tone, right at the end. Pulling back the umbrella slightly, I could see just how pale he looked. I kept myself from letting a shocked look overcome me, because, on the real, he looked like a serial killer. And that means it was time to go; I know what Washington is famous for and I needed to get out of here.

“Heh, yeah. Um, thanks for checking on me.” I tried to turn away and leave, but a pain shot right through the leg, keeping me planted in place for another second.

“You’re bleeding.” The man commented, pointing down at my throbbing leg.

“Ah shit…” I muttered. I pulled up the fleece and let out a groan.

“It’s probably the friction burn from the fabric and the impact. Nothing too serious.” I gave him a look and he laughed; it sounded like a hiss. “Don’t worry, I’m a doctor.” Which really didn’t make the situation any better, honestly. The only people who say shit like that are killers in movies so I’m not about to take my chances.

“Looks like a nice limp home is in the cards.” I said, clapping my hands together in an awkward way.

“Are you familiar with this campus?” I blinked at the question, nodding my head. “So, you could you tell me where the Physics department would be?”

“Um, yeah. The Physics department is in Physics-Astronomy Building.” With hand directions included, I explained how to get there from our current location, in probably the most unhelpful detail possible. He smirked at me, nodding his head with every word.

“Oh? Are you a physics student?”

I shook my head, smiling as politely as I could. “No, I’m an English major. But I have friends in the physics department.”

He nodded his head thoughtfully. “Well, there will be a lovely symposium and lecture on the findings from this university’s recent Nobel prize work.”

“Yeah, the neutrino particles. I’ve heard.” (2)

“An English student who knows about the neutrino experiments? How interesting.”

I shrugged. “Not really, I know Itachi Uchiha personally and he headed one of the teams researching with the SNO. Sometimes if I’d see him on campus, we’d get coffee and he’d tell me about the progress they’d made with their research. And that comprised mostly of me sitting there getting words thrown at me and him rambling about data I couldn’t even begin to decipher.”

The man suddenly got closer to me, completely invading my Naruto-safe space. I frowned and taking a step back. “And how did you meet such a man? Considering you don’t even work in the same department, I find it hard to believe you’d meet so casually.”

Feeling a tiny spark of anger, I leaned in closer, a threatening kind of posture squaring my shoulders. “I don’t believe that’s any business of yours.”

He took a step back, smiling in a way that was too haughty to be considered polite. “Forgive me.” He turned on his heel and started to head towards Red Square. I blinked, feeling an awkward familiarity filling me, but I didn’t know why, or where it was coming from. I’d definitely never met that guy before; you remember a face like that. Mother was only one who could love it…

Limping back to my apartment, I decided to quickly check the mail before getting into the elevator. There was a haphazardly shoved packaged squishing the ads and coupons into the back so I pulled it out first, sighing when I saw the neat, even handwriting. How did he get this in my mail box? You need a key to open it. I ignored the mystery, thinking that, perhaps, a certain roommate of mine may have played a hand in the case of the package. I’m not up for detective work. This was something from Sasuke. Just from the shape and size of the package, it was more than obvious what the contents were.

When I reached my floor from the elevator, I noticed someone loitering around my door. Blinking, I started walking faster, smiling as Iruka looked up and towards me. He greeted me warmly and I did my best to reach him in a timely manner. We embraced, him patting me on the back gently. “What happened to your leg?” He asked, pulling back from me.

I laughed nervously, pulling my keys out of my pocket. “I had a little accident in the Quad.”

“I’ll get you all fixed up.” He walked straight in, going for the bathroom. I set everything but Sasuke’s package down on the small table by the door, making my way slowly towards the couch. Iruka came back out with bandages and anti-septic; I don’t push him away or insist I do it myself because then he might mother-hen me to death. “So, you decided that taking a run in the rain would be the best thing to do today?”

I frowned, letting out a sigh. I had been keeping the Sasuke situation under wraps from him just because I really did not need another person trying to push us together. I already had enough pressure from Sai, Itachi, and Sasuke himself to make a decision about our apparent future together. “I had a lot on my mind.”

“You having problems with your classes? Or is it that lazy professor again?” I hissed as Iruka dabbed a little too hard on my scrap with a cotton ball. He mumbled an apology before continuing to treat me.

“That’s not it. It’s my personal life.”

“Oh, Sai again. What did he do this time?”

“Sai does plenty of things without needing a time frame, but that’s not my problem right now either. He’s actually been very emotionally supportive lately.”

“Are you…Getting back together with him?” Iruka looked up from my wound and stared deeply into my eyes. I started to laugh, like genuinely laugh. I tried to stop myself before I had tears streaming down my face, but I just continued to laugh at the insanity of the question. Date Sai again? No way.

“No, dude.” I coughed, having residual chuckles. “Been there, done that.”

“Good, becau-“

“Yeah, yeah, I know. You don’t like Sai much and you don’t know why I dated him for so long.” I said with my hand raised. “I’ve memorized that particular lecture, okay?” Iruka ‘hmph’ed at me and I rolled my eyes. “The only boyfriend I had that you liked was Sasuke.” Iruka nodded slowly, placing a huge bandage on my scrap. 

“Speaking of Uchiha,” Iruka said, sitting up straighter. “Itachi called me this morning.”

My features immediately fell at the implications. “Oh no he did not.”

Iruka raised an eyebrow. “Tell me, now, what’s going on?”

“Wait, he didn’t tell you?”

“What was he supposed to tell me? Are you in some kind of trouble?” He stopped for a moment, eyes narrowing so he could almost peer at my face even better than before. “Are you dating Itachi?”

A disgusted look took over my face when Iruka said that. Not that I find Itachi unattractive or anything, but it would just be too weird dating someone I’ve thought of as a brother for almost thirteen years. “Whoa, Iruka, whoa. Slow your roll there.” He frowned at me and I grabbed the package, handing it to him. I sighed as he opened the package, pulling out a note and the ring box.

“Sasuke?”

“Yep. Sasuke came back.”

“And?”

I took the ring box from Iruka, opening it and just staring at that beautiful, simple band. I slipped it onto my finger and held it out. “Sasuke asked me to marry him.”

“You said ‘no’, right?”

Taken aback for a moment, I turned my attention away from the ring and to Iruka’s face. “Wait, you don’t want me and Sasuke to get married?”

“As much as I like Sasuke, him asking you to marry him out of the blue doesn’t seem very…Practical.”

“You are my sanity, Iruka.” I put my face in my hands. “I knew you’d understand my side on this.”

Iruka rolled his eyes. “So, what exactly has been happening?”

I went through it all with Iruka, Sasuke’s return, the proposal, the date which then turned into a fight. And of course, everyone’s opinions and what they think Sasuke and I should be doing in our relationship. Iruka nodded his head, listening carefully to what I was saying and I ended with, “But I still don’t understand why I’m so upset. I mean, shouldn’t I feel relieved? I told Sasuke how I felt but when I was out on my run, it kind of hit me that everything we had is…Over. And it hurts me to think about our relationship just…burning out like that.”

Iruka placed a hand on my shoulder and I leaned over to him, resting my forehead on him. “Am I wrong for feeling like this?”

“Of course not, Naruto.” Iruka said, running a hand through my hair.

“When I was talking with Sai today, he said that Sasuke’s return triggered all my negative emotions to come back, like my anger towards him, the hurt I felt, all of it. We never really had closure so there was always a chance we’d have something, and now that there is a potential for something, I just can’t let go of those feelings. And I’m not sure if that’s me letting my own feelings get the best of me. Like I should be validated in what I’m doing, right?”

“It sounds like you’re disappointed.”

“What?”  

“Well, it’s not like you and Sasuke ever ended on bad terms. He never did anything that completely emotionally invalidated you. He didn’t cheat, he made time for you, you two had good, clear communication.” I nodded my head, listening. “I mean, yes, he did leave for college, but it wasn’t as though he disappeared and then suddenly resurfaced. You two never moved on from where you were and got stuck in what your relationship was supposed to be instead of what it actually is. So when he did come back and introduced the potential of a new relationship both of you were too focused on what the past relationship was to make this new one work.”

I sat in silence for a second, blinking at what Iruka said. “So,” I paused, looking straight at the wall to keep my mind from getting muddled. I had many, many thoughts in this moment about what Iruka had said and I was just going to grab at the largest one and roll with it.  “I shouldn’t get back together with Sasuke because my feelings for him are stuck in the past and everything we have is just really strongly laced nostalgia.”

Iruka shook his head. “That’s not what I was saying at all. You’re an English major for Christ’s sake.” Iruka sighed, patting me on the shoulder. “I forgot how jumbled he makes you.”

I crossed my arms over my chest. “I’m not as bad as I used to be around Sasuke. I’d like to think my repertoire of coping techniques has gotten a little better since I was eighteen.”

“We can only hope.” Iruka looked at me seriously for a moment. “Naruto, listen. Your relationship with Sasuke is only going to work if you get passed the past. It needs to be a mostly blank slate which means, unfortunately for Sasuke, probably no marriage.”

“But the ring is so nice…” I had slipped onto my finger and was examining it.

“Naruto.”

“I was mostly kidding, jeez.”

“You and Sasuke need to have a sit down; air everything out. Which is going to be hard for you,” I let out an exasperation at the claim. Me, difficult to talk to when I had feels? Well, it’s pretty true, I was going to have to pull myself back in so I didn’t just immediately step all over Sasuke’s toes and whip myself into a frenzy. “Sasuke has to say his piece and explain himself too. The only way you can let go of your past is to talk through it and get closure for it. If you can’t do that and you two get stuck up on the pitfalls, then there’s no chance you’ll be able to move forward.”

“I think Sasuke might be a little more stuck on the past than I am.” I said, running a hand through my hair. “He went from casual to ‘let’s get married’ in like two days.”

Iruka frowned. “I know some things about Sasuke’s college experience that you probably don’t. And that means you’re going to have to speak to him about it and work through those issues with him because it’s not really my place to tell you about the problems he was having.”     

“You’re right.” I said, with a slight nod. “We really need to sit down and talk.” I tried to pull the ring back off my finger, eyes widening. “Um…” Iruka looked down at my hand and he raised an eyebrow. “I can’t get the ring off.”

Both of us were silent for a second and I continued to tug on the ring, straining and starting to sweat from how much force I was using. I could feel my skin thinning and I had to force myself to stop so I wouldn’t hurt myself. Iruka got on his feet and pulled me into my kitchen, shoving my hand under hot water to help loosen the ring. It still wouldn’t come off.

We used more water, nearly boiling hot and freezing, two different kinds of oil, and sheer force…The ring wouldn’t come off. “THIS IS A SIGN FROM GOD!” I yelled, still tugging at the stupid band. “HE WANTS SASUKE AND I TO GET MARRIED.”

“Naruto, get in my car. I’m going to take you to the hospital to get it cut off.”

I pulled my hand into my chest, frowning. “But…”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘BUT’!” He yelled grabbing me by the arm. “You could have _very_ serious health problems because of that ring. It’ll cut off the blood flow to your finger because of how tight it is!”

I looked over at the clock, nearly screaming when I realized what time it was. “WHAT THE FUCK WHY DID YOU NOT TELL ME IT WAS ALMOST TEN? I HAVE A CLASS IN THIRTY MINUTES.”

Iruka watched me as I rushed around, throwing myself together for a class. He was leaning against the wall, frowning as he waited for me to stop panicking and running around my apartment like a chicken with its head cut-off. He grabbed me when I tried to run by him and out the door. “Naruto, you come here straight after class.” He had his scolding, gentle tone going and he wouldn’t break eye contact with me. “If you don’t come straight here after class so we can go to the hospital, there will be hell to pay. Understand?”  
\--

“I’M SORRY I’M LATE.” I said, panting harshly. “I totally lost track of time.” I was really only five minutes late and my students were just shrugging. “Okay, sorry about that everyone. I promise this was a onetime thing.” I pulled chalk out of my bag and slapped my copy Paradise Lost on the table next to me, coughing slightly. “Everyone pull out your notebooks and we’ll get ready for today’s topic; Literary Comparison.”

I held up Paradise Lost. “Chances are, if you’re an English major in this department, you had to read Paradise Lost in two-ninety-seven. But for those of us who’ve either forgotten or haven’t read it by some miracle, Paradise Lost is considered the first Epic Poem written in English. It was written by John Milton and boy, is it a hefty son-of-a-bitch.” I set down my copy and started passing the chalk back and forth between my hands, still taking the occasional glances down at my finger. It wasn’t starting to swell yet, but man did it look unhappy. The skin above the ring was red and splotchy. Maybe I should have just cancelled class and went to the ER like Iruka said…

Maybe I’ll just cancel class early.

“As we all know, there is an option in this class for your final paper to be a literary comparison; this poem and the bible. And I felt like today we should take some time out to discuss it just to give you time to read this sucker and find evidence, and get a solid perspective into some of your analysis…if you decide this is the paper you want to go for.”

“Alright before I dive in, are there any questions or concerns?” The whole class was silent, some of them yawning or shaking their heads. One person raised their hand in the second row and I pointed to them.

“So, like, are you okay? I saw that nasty spill in the Quad.”

My mouth opened and I turned all my attention to the girl sitting in the second row. She smiled sheepishly at me.

“You saw that?”

“Yeah…Are you okay? It looked like you fell pretty hard.”

There were a few snickers going through the class and I wanted to sink into a hole. Maybe I should have gone to the ER with Iruka. “Oh yeah, I’m fine. Also thanks for checking on me _at the time_.”

“Sorry Naruto, I was going to but that woman who helped you up, on the real, looked like a serial killer.”

“First of all, it was a man. And secondly, just because this is Washington doesn’t mean everyone is a serial killer.”

“Ted Bundy went to UW.” Fired off one of the guys sitting towards the back of the room. I blinked at him.

“Yeah I know. If you live in McMahon, there’s where Ted Bundy lived when he was still here. Ooo beware. We all know that. If you take Psych one-o-one, that’s one of the first things they talk about. And I live with a psych major so I know all about this, trust me.” I shook my head, “Anyway, this guy wasn’t even attending the university, nor was he a professor. He was here for some conference in the physics department.”    

I composed myself as everyone seemed to quiet down and get a grip on themselves. At least they were a little more lively than usual. And that meant maybe I could get a good discussion out of them. Ahh, not having to talk the entire two hours, what a blessing.

“So before we begin, any questions related to this class?” No one said anything and I gave them plenty of time to mull everything over before beginning, again. “Okay, cool. What is really important to know about Paradise Lost is that it is primarily focuses on the first few chapters of Genesis. Which, as the horrible monster I am, assigned for your reading over the weekend.” I put my chalk to the board and started writing. “Milton’s goal as an author was to explain the events of Genesis to those who couldn’t understand or did not have the means to understand, like ‘oh, why did God do this’, ‘why didn’t he stop Satan’, et cetera. Of course, ironically, he did it in the most convoluted way possible and wrote an epic poem, but c’est la vie. And for the comparative papers, I would appreciate if you looked at…” I started pointing to what I wrote on the board as I spoke. “Characterization, the God and Satan Paradigm, and of course, Free Will. I’m not going to limit you on the topics of comparison, I just find these are the easiest to do and require the least amount of outside research…But that’s not required anyway, just if you want to add a critic or two to buff up your point.”     

I circled Free Will and turned back towards the class, clapping chalk off my hands. “Now, arguably in Genesis we can see Free Will play out with Adam and Eve because they are the ones who freely make the decisions they did and obviously God didn’t exactly stop them. But what we should think about in terms of Free Will is-“

The door opened and slammed; of course because I was facing the classroom and not the chalkboard, I saw who came in immediately. I took a deep breath through my nose and tried to calm myself, keep a handle on the situation, but really? Two classes in a row? And he brought Itachi? I can’t do this. I’m going to kill Sasuke and Itachi and then I’ll be the new UW killer and people will talk about Parrington hall in infamy for years to come.

“Why is he here? I can’t fucking believe this!”

Itachi glanced out the small, square port-hole like window and put his back against the wall, sipping out of a Starbucks cup. “He’s probably here for the physics conference.”

“Oi, Uchiha brothers, out of my fucking classroom.” I bristled when neither of them acknowledged me. 

“Hi Professor Uchiha.”

“Good morning.” Itachi turned his head, smiling gently.

THEY DIDN’T EVEN TURN TO LOOK AT ME WHEN I SAID SOMETHING. OKAY, FOR REAL, IT’S ON. I’M NOT GOING TO BE DISRESPECTED BY THEM.

I walked towards them, opening the door and attempting to shove them out when Sasuke grabbed me by the arm and displaced me, putting me behind himself as if he was trying to hide me. What the hell is he doing? He turned slightly to look at me, putting both hands on my shoulders and staring at me straight in the face. “Naruto, we need to hide in your classroom.”

“Absolutely not. I’m trying to teach a class in here. You two are distracting!” I said pushing him off, it was a light push but I was still trying to make a point. This wasn’t like Sasuke teaching in Kane, this was a thirty-person-max room, they stood out.

“Do you remember what I told you about that professor I had?” He said in a very serious tone. I blinked, nodding. “He’s here. And he saw us because _Itachi_ decided he wanted Starbucks this morning instead of using his coffee pot.”

“I can’t make a white chocolate mocha at home, Sasuke.”

I massaged my temple, feeling the agitation beginning to overwhelm me. I’m seriously just trying to teach, that’s it. I’m trying to give my students their money’s worth out of this experience but these two assholes are throwing off my groove. “Nu-uh, I have so much beef with the two of you right now that I hope that creep catches both of you and you have to listen to what he says for at least an hour.”

“Are you wearing the engagement ring?” Itachi asked, completely ignoring me. He sipped his coffee, an amused glint in his eyes. I glanced at my hand, still rubbing aggressively at my temple and I blanched a little at the connotation. Of course, neither of them knew it was stuck and didn’t actually mean anything, but the point to them was I was wearing it.  

I was about to open my mouth when another person opened the door. It was the man from earlier with the umbrella and the sickly pale skin. He just smirked at me when he shut the door behind him. “Not exactly the warmest welcome, but I guess I should have expected the Seattle Freeze.”

“Oh no, no, no.” I said, waving my hand dismissively. “All of you, out of my classroom.”

“What a horrible rebuke from the person I helped this morning.” He replied; I was blanking on a name. I don’t think he gave me one. I looked out of the corner of my eye at Sasuke; he was tensed at my side, almost touching me. I thought for a moment and realized this man was the man Sasuke had told me about, the one that propositioned him and he refused, the one who stalked him. Orochimaru. I bit the inside of my cheek, getting on the defensive.

I felt my heart pick up in tempo just looking at that bastard’s face, how smug he was when he managed to catch Sasuke’s eye. But Sasuke quickly turned away from him, focusing his attention on me instead.

“Helped?” Sasuke asked, raising a skeptical eyebrow.

“I fell this morning.” I replied, not looking Sasuke in the eye. Mostly because it’s embarrassing for a grown man to say he scraped his knee.

“Are you alright?” Sasuke tried to look me over but I put a hand up.

“Yes, I’m fine. It was just a friction burn. Now will you all get out of my classroom?”

“But Naru-“

“No, don’t you even ‘but Naruto’ me, I’m trying to conduct myself as an academic professional and y’all are up in my classroom raising too much hell.”

“He’s very right.” Orochimaru said, smirking at me. Oh, he’s acting like I’m helping him. But in all honestly I just want them all out of my classroom. And Sasuke was one of the last people I wanted to see today after I had that talk with Iruka. I was going to procrastinate the sit down as long as possible so I could really figure out what I wanted to say. “UW is such an expensive _public_ school. These children deserve the best use of their time, don’t you agree gentlemen?”

Itachi crossed his arms, pinning everyone in the room in place with a cold stare. Of course, Sasuke and I have buffed our defenses against such a look but everyone else in the room kind of frozen in place and it got very silent. “Is your dick measuring contest over?” I asked, matching Itachi’s stance, going on the offensive. “Because if it is, I can kindly direct you to the door.” I watched as Orochimaru’s eyes fell to the hand I used to point to the door. He was staring at the ring.

He laughed slightly, “So, that’s how you know Itachi. You’re engaged to him.”

The room was completely silent for approximately three seconds before my students collectively started to whisper and laugh, huddling together to start gossiping.

“Whoa, whoa!” What the fuck was that leap in logic? Like for real, how the fuck is he going to make that assessment when _Sasuke_ was the one who was all over me when he heard I got hurt? Is he stupid? Is he delusional?   

Itachi grabbed me and put me by his side. “Ah, looks like you found me out, isn’t that right darling?”

 _“Itachi.”_ Sasuke said in a dangerous tone, glaring daggers. Itachi waved him off, dismissively.

“Holy shit, Naruto snagged himself a hottie. You go, Naruto!”

“Naruto! You didn’t tell us you got engaged! Congratulations!” 

“I didn’t even know Professor Uchiha was gay!”

“You guys, this isn’t-” I turned towards Itachi who just seemed to be soaking up all the chaos he and Orochimaru just created. I grabbed onto the collar of his jacket, pulling him down to me. “Itachi, I will elbow drop you. I’ve known you long enough not to be afraid of you.” He smirked at me, ruffling my hair. I pulled away from him and walked over to Sasuke, grabbing his hand. “I’m actually engaged to Sasuke, thanks. Itachi just likes to mess with people.” 

Wait.

What did I just say?

I JUST SAID I WAS ENGAGED TO SASUKE BUT WE AREN’T ENGAGED AT ALL. GODDAMN THAT SUBLIMINAL SUGGESTION! HOW DARE ITACHI PLAY HIS GAME WITH ME SO WELL.

“Wow, really? At least professor Uchiha has tenure.”

I frowned, turned my head towards whoever said that. Everyone was looking away, some of them snickering from the comment. “Really guys?”

I smiled weakly as Sasuke squeezed my hand gently, the coolness of his fingers focusing me a little more into the situation. I turned towards Orochimaru; there was a derisive look to his face, a smirk on his lips and a shine to his eyes that I really didn’t like. “How strange. I taught Sasuke for years and I never heard a word about you.”

“Considering you just believed me to be Itachi’s fiancé, you probably did hear and just ignored it.” I said with a smile. Someone behind us made a quiet ‘oooooo’ under their breaths. “I know who you are and what you are to Sasuke, so don’t even try to get up in my face and make some kind of power play with me, like you know him better than I do or ever will. He ran from Suzzalo all the way to Parrington, that probably means he doesn’t want to talk to you or see your face. Anyone with a set of eyes can see that both Sasuke and Itachi are avoiding you. So why don’t you turn your happy ass around and back the fuck off of my fiancé?” I hadn’t realized how close I had gotten to Orochimaru until his back touched the door.

He laughed and I felt my temper flare up but he just patted me on the shoulder, reaching for the door knob. “My, my, what a lively man Sasuke has gotten involved with. And so possessive.” Orochimaru smiled at Itachi, as if he seemed to forget Sasuke and I existed for a moment. “I look forward to your speech tonight, Professor Uchiha.”

“Of course you are. You’ve probably listened to yourself talk so much that anyone else’s voice will be the catharsis you need.” Itachi said with an agreeable nod, not even looking up from the lid of his coffee.

With a huff, Orochimaru left, but not before passing a final glance at me. Itachi smirked, looking incredibly satisfied with how the situation turned out. “Looks like it was a good thing you put on the ring.” Itachi acknowledged. “Which reminds me, would you like to be my pretend fiancé again, Naruto? Perhaps tonight at a reception?”

I blinked, frowning. He wasn’t even bothering to hide the amused look on his face. “Why not ask your cohort, Sai? He’d probably loved to get all dressed up and act all lovey-dovey with you.”

Itachi pulled out his phone. “Now that is a plan I can agree too.”

I shook my head, knowing there was no way my class was going to recover after today. Well, there weren’t trying to teach for the day. Sasuke briefly squeezed my hand, grabbing my attention. “Thank you, Naruto. I’m sorry we dragged you into this.”

I snorted. “Not a problem. While I don’t appreciate you interrupting my class, I was able to vent a bit of frustration onto that…Asshole.” I could feel the rant coming up but I’m a mature adult know, I could suppress it. I waved my hand as to physically dismiss the thoughts that kept swelling up and wanting to be released. Like seriously? Having the nerve to bring up Sasuke didn’t mention me to him? Ohh, I’m so shocked that my fucking fiancé didn’t want to have anything to do with you and didn’t want you to have any access to his personal life. How ridiculous.

I paused for a moment turning to look at Sasuke’s face. Jesus Christ I’m starting to refer to Sasuke as my fiancé, before we even talked through everything! I’ve been infected by a seriously weird mood…

“Why are you wearing the ring anyway?” Sasuke asked, grabbing my hand. I felt a flush of heat going up into my face and I laughed, nervously, despite myself.

“It’s stuck.” I mumbled. Sasuke raised an eyebrow, releasing an amused chuckle. “I was showing it to Iruka and I put it on and now…I can’t get it off. AND ANOTHER THING ITACHI-“ I said turning toward him, my hand still held by Sasuke. “How could involve Iruka in this?”

Itachi smirked. “Oh, I feel he is a very important piece to this.”

“Don’t even begin to think for two seconds that Iruka would bait me into marrying Sasuke! I’m seriously pissed off that all of you keep shoving us together! I’m a goddamn adult and capable of making my decisions!”

“Do you really think that’s why I called Iruka? How little of me do you think?”

Oh here we go with another cryptic Uchiha puzzle. What was the purpose of calling Iruka then? He didn’t need to be involved unless Itachi thought that Iruka was supposed to encourage me into a relationship. I felt Sasuke pull at the ring on my finger and I turned my head towards him; Sasuke held the band in his fingers.

He got it off?

“YOU FUCKING WIZARD!” I said excitedly, grabbing onto the ring. “Oh thank god, I thought I was going to have to get it cut off.”

“I’ll get it resized.” Sasuke said simply. “I really thought we wore the same ring size. Did I not put it on you when I proposed…?”   

“Before we get that far, Sasuke.” I said; I couldn’t help but avoid his line of sight as I spoke, knowing how stupid I got when we were together. “We need to talk.”

“I agree.”

“Okay.” I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding and nodded my head. “Okay.” I had to mentally prepare myself for this and that meant keeping a lid on myself whenever he sparked my temper. Maybe I should get a stress ball and draw his face on it…

"I'll meet you at your apartment later tonight." Sasuke got really close to me, holding both of my hands. I looked directly into his face. "No more running, we're going to talk this through." I swallowed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a couple notes:  
> 1\. When Naruto is like "This dude is definitely not from Washington" its because Orochimaru's using an umbrella. I don't know WHY this is a stereotype thing we do here, but it is. To be fair, in my daily life or when i go outside, I never use an umbrella. And whenever one of my friends does, I'm like "Y'all is weak. You embraced the rain, I was molded by it!" Because you know, we all have to get in our free Bane speech every year.  
> 2\. The neutrino particle project is actually something that was done at the UW and is an internation project that is in north America, Sweden-if i'm not mistaken, and Japan. UW was officially recognized for a nobel prize in October of 2015, I would go into detail about it but when I was reading about it, my English major came through, and I only REALLY BRIEFLY got the gist of it. Go ahead and look it up for yourselves if you're interested.


	6. FINALE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto and Sasuke finally sit down and talk about their feelings. And in the end, something marvelous happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS EVERYONE. YA BOI UPDATED AND SHE IS FINALLY FINISHED WITH THE GREATEST PIECE OF WRITING I HAVE EVER ATTEMPTED. SO FUCKING STRAP IN AND HOLD ONTO YOUR FUCKING HATS AND PHONES AND SHIT BECAUSE I AM NOT TOUCHING THIS STORY EVER AGAIN SO CRY ALL YOU WANT. I had this fucking finished in September and guess what happened? It didn't save in my google docs, which i am slightly glad about because the original opening scene wasn't as good, neither was the resolution(i completely skipped Naruto's feelings like a COMPLETE IDIOT GOD), and the proposal, forget about it PLS. TOO CLICHE! Anyway, I hope you all enjoy my gift. Please enjoy the last chapter of...PROMISES.

Between supplementary material and a pile of books, I sat regretting my own flawed logic. How

the fuck was I supposed to get any work done when Sasuke’s loom-y presence was lurking around. My fingers were twitching for God’s sake. You can’t take notes with twitchy hands-especially not me- my handwriting was subpar, at best.

I have the brief thought of barging into Sai’s room and harassing him, to distract myself from Sasuke’s eventual and pertinent call, but, from the not-really-music-dubstep-electro-hipster-trance music, Sai’s working on a painting or a drawing. One thing I remember so well from our relationship was sitting in his “studio” and just watching him. He would wear old, paint covered jeans and an old, way too big tie dye shirt, his hands would be smudged with charcoal or he’d be making delicate strokes with a perfect blend of color.

Of course, I’d be waiting and watching because break time was generally also sex time but sometimes it was nice to watch him work.

I grabbed my notes from the top of the stack of the supplements, trying desperately to cling to my words instead of my thoughts. I got the call right after my class that I would be substituting for a different girl in my department. She was going on maternity leave a quarter earlier than she had planned. Apparently, I was the only person in the entire department who had the schedule to match hers. I sighed, defeated. Kakashi had totally goaded me with the idea of a challenge.  Plus, she’d been more than accommodating to my current schedule, going as far as to drop off her notes, every single book she used for the class-which were just destroyed with sticky notes-, and a list of movies.

I slapped my own copies of the novels open and started to re-read my notes. I started to rip apart new sticky notes and mark sections in my copies, trying to flag moments she and I both noticed, building my theme for the book…

Generally, when one teaches this class, because it’s a senior capstone, the students do most of the the thesis and them work for you…and come up with some pretty great thoughts. With the right direction.

Which means a lot of the same thoughts will be covered in the same movements of narrative. And I really don’t want to be the gay TA who teaches about queen theory and homosocial normalization…

Or sexism.

I decided that maybe my time would be better spent watching one of the movies she gave me. At least then I could moderately zone out but also been keenly aware of what was happening on screen.

I slipped Double Indemnity into my PS3 and turned off the lights in the kitchen. I wrapped a blanket around my shoulders and settled in. I’d take notes my second watch, if anything this was just for pleasure.

It was gunna be really hard not to talk about sexism…because Jesus christ how could you not? They used to treat women like garbage, no wonder the femme Fatale was such a popular trope…

I grabbed my notes pad and wrote **_“CREATING THE FEMME FATALE- >DEMONIZATION OF WOMEN CREATING AGENCY”._**

DAMN I’M GOOD. Didn’t even take like an hour and I got a theme for the class. I’m fucking amazing.

 _“’Shut up and kiss me’.”_ I couldn’t hold back a laugh at that line. Oh man, I forgot that those tropes existed for a reason…AND PEOPLE THOUGHT SHIT LIKE THIS WAS ROMANTIC.

I shook my head, but then a thought loomed on me. Sasuke and I kinda had a relationship like that, didn’t we? We tried to bury protest with silence and physical affection…

Which means that if this was Noir, Sasuke would totally be my femme fatale, wrecking up my life but also my last real temptation. I could see it all now…

_The rain fell in a hazy mist around us, only illuminated by the street lamps. The rim of my hat kept the top part of Sasuke’s beautiful face out of my view. I tried to walk past him but he grabbed me by the wrist turning me around. He was glaring, flicking my hat up so I could look into his eyes. “Ya just gunna leave? Just like that? Not a word more?”_

_“Oh like how youse left me? Going off to ya fancy college. I don’t need ya, youse just gunna hurt me again.”_

_“Don’t talk like that, yeah? Youse really think I meant to hurt ya like that? That being away from ya was easy on me. I love ya, ya crazy dame. I’ve always loved ya, not even distance could keep ya outta my thoughts, get me?”_

_He grabbed me around the waist, our chests pressed together. He knocked the hat off my head, letting the misty droplets settle and bead up in my hair and on my forehead. “I’ve been waiting for the right time to have ya again. I won’t let ya get away again, even if I have to follow ya yo the end of the earth.” He kissed my forehead. “You’ll do the same, right?”_

_“Sasuke, ya ever stray again I’ll break both ya fucking legs, and drag ya back if I gotta.” Sasuke’s lips curled up against my forehead._

  _“Youse a crazy one, but damn it if that doesn’t make ya nice and ripe. Not, be a good boy and lemme pick ya. I’ve waited long enough for ya cherries.”_

"Why the fuck did I turn into the girl in my own fantasy?” I muttered to myself.

 “No need to fantasize about me anymore. I have arrived.” Sasuke said. I nearly jumped to the ceiling, throwing my blanket and papers everywhere.

 “WHAT THE FUCK! YOU FUCKING SERIAL ROBBER, STOP INVITING YOURSELF IN.”

 Sasuke seemed to ignore my outburst, walking into the kitchen to grab something. “just so you know, I didn’t let myself in. Sai let me in cause you didn’t answer when I knocked…cause you were fantasizing…” I felt my cheeks heat up, looking away from him as he came back into the living room with two glasses. He put a bag on the table and patted the stop next to him. “I brought vodka to take the edge off.” Sasuke cracked up a bottle of V8 for himself and threw me a bottle of Dr. Pepper.

I sighed, sitting down next to him. Bless him for knowing I needed a couple shots to slow down my thoughts.

Wait…

“Isn’t this a bad idea? I have no filter.” I said looking over at Sasuke. He shrugged.

“More honest that way. Plus the probability we bang goes up enough for me to take the risk.”

“If this is all a ploy to get me naked, I assure you there are easier ways.”

“Naruto, when we were sixteen you chugged one beer and immediately ripped off your pants. I think I know what I’m doing.”

“In my defense,” I said, raising a finger. “It was summer and it was fucking ungodly hot.”

Sasuke hummed thoughtfully as he put his drink to his lips. “I see your point and raise you seventeenth birthday and the field incident. It was October.”

“Umm,” I scoffed. “The obvious explanation for that is I wanted to go streaking in the cemetery to see if I could impress some ghosts and get super powers. Duh. Fucking peasant how could you not want that?”

“Would have been cursed, for sure.” Sasuke crossed himself, through wrong way I might add. I’ve seen Austin Powers enough to know spectacles, testicles, wallet, and watch. God, what a loser.

“First of all, you did that wrong. Two, dick is so impressive, definitely would have been blessed with powers.”

“Care to let me judge?”

“Are you already drunk or something?” I questioned, pushing his face so that he was sitting on the other side of the couch. “I’m not drunk enough yet.”

“Get on my level.” He said toasting me.

“How much have you eaten today?”

Sasuke laughed, rolling his eyes. He sat forward. “Naruto, we’re in college. We don’t eat.”

“Yeah, true.” I said pulling my laptop into my lap.

“I’m making your drink for you.” Sasuke commented.

“Three fingers.” I replied; I heard him suddenly stop pouring. He definitely made my drink too strong. Asshole. “I’m getting pizza.”

“I want-“

“Extra sauce, extra tomatoes, light cheese, regular olives and green peppers.”

“And you didn’t want to get married.” I tried not to smile as Sasuke toasted me again. I shrugged. “You getting your meat lovers?”

“Uh, yes. Don’t you know, I love meat in my mouth.”

He muttered something like “could have fooled me” and I smacked him with one of the throw pillows that Sai insisted we get. “Okay,” I leaned back with my way too strong drink and Sasuke slowly moved over to me, throwing his arm around my shoulder. At first, I resisted the cuddle because I refused to give in to the warmth of his body and all that it meant, but he smelled good and my face started to warm up from the alcohol.

0o0o0o0o0o0

I finished off my second drink and my third slice of pizza when Sasuke looked over at me. He only had a little color to his face which meant he was feeling good, but wasn’t obliterated. Now would be a good time to just completely unload on him and ruin his mood. I opened my mouth to say something when he flicked a piece of sausage at me. It hit me right in the cheek and my eyes widened in both confusion and shock. That fucking bitch. He caught me so off-guard, little fucking asshole.

I couldn’t contain my laughter. I tried to be mad that he had turned into a five year old but I couldn’t it was too funny.

“Dude, fuck off.” I couldn’t breathe, Sasuke ripped the crust from between his lips. I punched him in the arm as he scooted away from me, trying not to choke on his bite of food. 

He swallowed. “What? We all know you love meat near your face.”

I coughed from laughing. “You’re stupid.” I complained. He grabbed my hand and we started to play fight, or at least what I thought was us play fighting until he yanked me into his side of the couch. I raised an eyebrow at his sudden closeness, wondering just when we had crossed the barrier into each other’s space. His face looked so serious as he leaned into me.

“I missed you.” He muttered against my lips.

“Sasuke?” Our mouths met and he tasted like an overload of tomato, which is definitely not the taste you want after a romantic confession. I shook away from him but he held firm, kissing me with need. God damn that mouth, sucking me in and washing away my resolve. I couldn’t help myself and started to kiss back. He tried to lay me back on the couch, but I knew if I let him get that far, I wouldn’t be able to stop him. We still needed to talk, not our stupid back and forths. I pulled back from him. “If you missed me, you could have come back.” I said, despondent from the small cold shock in my chest.

“You could have come out.” He replied, testily I might add. He even had an eyebrow cocked as if that reply was obvious. “I actually thought you’d surprise me with that one.”

“So, I had to pick up my life and move? But you, who already had a life here, couldn’t stay?” I folded my arms across my chest. We separated, giving each other space. “Why is it that I have to be the one who does the grand, romantic gestures?” 

“You’re always the impulsive…explosive one.” He said, as though…YES, OKAY it’s obviously me, but that doesn’t mean I’m always impulsive and don’t think things through. Jerk. “I figured it may have been in your bag of tricks.”

“That’s stupid. What would I have done when I got there? I didn’t get into college out there, hell, I didn’t even apply. You never told me you were going to leave until a few months before! How the fuck am I supposed to be all…Mr. Spontaneous when I can’t even plan for it!”

“You rarely plan for anything-you always flew the by the seat of your pants. I loved that about you, I never knew what to expect. I would have taken care of you.”

My eyes narrowed. “I’m not a fucking house wife or your damn pet. I don’t want you to take care of me.” I raised my hand taking a deep breath as Sasuke looked away from me, knowing he’d lost that one. “Which goes back to-why the fuck does it have to be me? You could have come back _three years ago_ and we wouldn’t be sitting here arguing; we’d probably be married by now.”

“You were with _him,_ ” Sasuke shook his head, exasperated. I could feel myself sobering because of the heat and blood pumping in my head. I had to stop and swallow the rage bubbling up in my throat. “I didn’t want you to feel like you had to choose me if I came back, so I made it easy for you.”

“Why the fuck would you think that? Sasuke, news flash, I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you for years. Sure, we may not have gotten back together right away but I still would have been happy see you, feel you, just-just…God, why would you think I wouldn’t want you, no matter what?”

“Because I was depressed.” Sasuke replied. He was completely silent for a moment and he looked away. “I didn’t even want me-to be me. I was miserable, so I felt that you didn’t want me too, which is why you were happy with someone else.” He shrugged, sighing. “The closest thing I found to a relationship-a functional one- was with the lesbian chick I worked with at that shitty gas station.”

“You worked at a gas station?”

“Yeah, I had to, fucking mom and dad were like ‘oh Sasuke, we’re paying your tuition but we’re not gunna pay for the rest of your expenses.’ So, I had to get a job, and go to school full time to keep my scholarship. And I needed that stupid scholarship even though it only covered like half of my tuition each year because out of state tuition is _crazy_ expensive.” He took a sip of his drink and I sat back with my still empty glass in hand considering the last little sip at the bottom. I decided to make myself another one, only half full. “And they basically told me: find an apartment and some roommates because they didn’t want to pay for on-campus housing.”

“Your parents are asshole, we know that.”

“Not mom, dad. She wanted to help me more, but dad was still pissed that he was paying for Itachi’s grad school on top of my out-of-state tuition.”

“Aren’t they the ones who pushed you both to go to college?”

“YES. Thank you, _god_. My main point, like don’t fucking push me to go to a good fucking school if you don’t wanna pay for it.” Sasuke shook his head. “They also shouldn’t have been paying for Itachi to go to grad school anyway. You don’t even apply for FAFSA with your parents’ info then. I mean, yeah, dad’s got hella family money and we own like three businesses and do well, but still-.”

“And you still didn’t learn that it’s ‘Itachi and I’.” Sasuke looked at me like he was going to kill me.

Sasuke held up his hand. “Anyway, I had a lot on my plate back East. I just couldn’t handle it properly so all I did was: barely sleep, barely eat, went to class, went to work, studied-so I didn’t have time to feel sad or sorry for myself. And repeat. And then Orochimaru happened, on top of everything else-and that rocked my confidence. ‘Oh good, another means of comparison to my brother’, ‘only creepy old men want to sleep with me, great’, ‘what if my professors are giving me these opportunities because they want to fuck me too?’.”

“Sasuke, why didn’t you tell me?” I grabbed his hand but he pulled away from me.

“I didn’t want you to think I was just complaining to you about my privileges and opportunities-I felt like I shouldn’t complain because I should have been grateful.” He put his glass down on the coffee table, finally turning back towards me, as if to gauge my reaction. I put my hand on his shoulder, smiling.

“You’ve always been like this. So. Fucking. Stubborn.” I rolled my eyes, shoving him back.

“The pot calling the kettle 'black'.”

I raised an eyebrow. “You’re never completely honest about your feelings. It’s okay to complain about your problems, dude. Just because you have good opportunities doesn’t mean you can’t feel fucking overwhelmed. I wouldn’t have been able to do that- I couldn’t. I would suffocate in that environment. I mean, you did it-lived every moment of it- and it made you fucking miserable. I wouldn’t want someone else to experience that. I’m proud of you for staying as strong as you did-basically without help too… ‘Cause you didn’t want to tell me anything.” I added for good measure. Sasuke’s lips tightened and he rolled his eyes. Sasuke’s face was slightly flushed. He leaned forward, laying his forehead on my shoulder.

He started laughing, wrapping his arms around me. “And that was just undergrad, too.” I started laughing and he pulled back. “But I guess we have plenty of time for you to tell me I’m stupid.”

I pulled back for a second, looking away. We were silent and let it settle over us before Sasuke cleared his throat. “Your turn.”

I raised an eyebrow. “What are you talking about? This is all you, dude. I’m fine.”

Sasuke gave me the most skeptical look I’ve ever seen in my life, scoffing at me. “Bullshit. If there was no issue, you would have taken the ring when I proposed. But you’re vehemently against us.”

“Am not. I just didn’t think it was practical.”

“No, that’s not it.”

“I was trying to be an adult about this, dude. Like we haven’t been together for years, things are-“ I trailed off and Sasuke looked at me, confused.

“Different?” He supplied. “Of course, they’re different, it’s been seven years. But we still haven’t really changed- in my case, at least.”

“Then….” I raised my voice to him and then got quiet. “Then why does…”

“What?”

“Everything feels…” I motioned between us. “It feels so similar and that makes me secure, and that’s when I slip up. I have expectations, and I know, deep down, it’s stupid for me to give you those expectations and make you live up to them. Like you said, things aren’t the same. But it _feels_ so… _Similar_ , I-I get confused.” I shook my head, trying to clear up all the words buzzing in my head like bees, overwhelming me.

“I won’t deny that it feels good to be with you Sasuke, physical or not, I missed you…Everything about you, even the stuff that used to piss me off.” I stopped, head feeling fuzzy as I tried to articulate my thoughts. It was all starting to come up at once, all the blurring of the lines and the feelings, bad, good, and in between. Memories flashed, old and recent. Everything came up. “But then, why do I feel so anxious? Why am I so angry? I was so happy to see you, I was so happy when you told me you loved me and gave me a ring. It’s like I’m waiting to wake up from a dream…I’ve thought about this moment so much that, I just…I’m disappointed?” I felt tears building up in my eyes and I tried to take a breath to calm myself but my breath shook with the rawness of my emotions. Sasuke pulled me into his arms. “Why can’t I get over it? I want to be with you so badly, why can’t I let the old us go? We’re not dead, so why?”

“I know exactly what you’re feeling.” Sasuke said in a whisper. I throw my arms around him so I can just have something to hold onto. My heart is racing and I feels like I could fall into something, I don’t know what it is, but I need him to ground me. His hands moved against my back, rubbing little circles. “It’s hard because _we_ haven’t changed much since we were eighteen, there may be stories we haven’t told each other and a new quirk here or there, but we’re the same people. But things outside of us have changed, our relationship has changed. We’re estranged.” My fingers tightened in his sweatshirt.

“Naruto, listen, look.” He pulled back from me, forcing me to look at him. “Things fall apart.” He said that with such finality that I tried to pull away from him and for some reason, I couldn’t help but feel a fear that this was going to be it. I couldn’t get over us, he wouldn’t stop leaving. This wasn’t going to work. I started to breathing in, panic constricting my chest. “But I’m here. I’m real, Naruto. Look at me.”  He touched my face then, cupping my cheek and gently wiping the tear falling from my eye with his thumb. “I may not have lived up to your dreams of how this would be and I may not be the best guy to live your life with, but I’m not leaving again. We’ll piece each other back together.”

“How do I know that? How can you be so sure!? You’re so sure about everything, why am I not reassured? I don’t get it Sas-“ He kissed me then, so gently. The press of his lips against mine wiped away all the lingering sadness in my stomach, and let me feel warm in his arms.

“Because it’s you.” He pressed his forehead against mine, his eyes were closed. “It’s always been you. That how I know. You tell me everything I need to hear, because you know me, and you understand me and my feelings. Itachi knows everything about what happened while I was gone and he tried, bless him, he tried to articulate that he was proud of me and that he was sorry for what happened, but it’s not who we are as people. You bring it out in me, you make me honest. And I know better now.” He paused, wrapping his arms around my chest. “Because I love you, and I tried to get over you, I tried to leave you, but I love you too much. I couldn’t come back home then because I would get stuck here-you’re here and-”

“If you try to leave again, I’ll lock you in my torture basement.” I wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my face into the crook. His scent overwhelmed me. 

“So, in Itachi’s basement.” There was a smile in his voice and I laughed, feeling even more tears springing up and dripping down my cheeks.  

“You’re stupid.” I muttered, kissing against his neck. “At least you’re stupid and pretty. So lucky.” I said sardonically, making Sasuke huff with laughter.

“I missed you.” He said, again.

“I missed you, too.” I felt my voice catch for a moment and I pulled him into my arms, my heart was racing. “I missed you so much-I was scared we were gunna fuck this up. I was scared we weren’t going to give this another try. I almost cried earlier when I thought about us being over…for good.”

“It’s not going to be the same.” Sasuke said quietly, “Not like the first time.”

“Oh thank god, our first time was so disappointing.”

“Shut up, I hadn’t watched enough porn yet to figure out exactly what I was doing. I got better.”

“Yeah, I know. A lot better.”

Sasuke pulled back, the heat not leaving his face from earlier, but it was different this time. It was a darker shade of red and he panted in breathy wisps, too warm on my cheeks. I could feel my lower half stir, “Should I show you my improved technique?”

“This isn’t a science fair, dude.”

“That’s usually where people show off their anatomy though.”

“Damn Sasuke, that was a good one.”

“Just shut up and kiss me, damn it.”

I tried not to laugh when he pushed me back into the couch, not hesitating to slips his tongue between my slightly parted lips. Relief was flooding over me and also arousal. I missed this too. With him being so close, his scent was so strong, his taste too pure, I moaned. I spread my legs so he could settle in, but instead, he pulled me up, trying to readjust so I was going to lay on his chest.

“What are you doing?” I muttered between kisses. “J-just hurry up, I want you inside me.” I pushed up his sweatshirt with my hand, finally feeling that smooth skin against my hand. He shivered.

“No, not this time. You’re gunna need to…” He pulled back and I raised an eyebrow.

“D-do you have whisky dick?” I whispered.

“No, I don’t have whisky dick.” His face was still flushed but it got a lot darker and he couldn’t look at me. “I-“ He cleared his throat. “I haven’t had sex in like…eight months so I don’t want to disappoint you.”

“But on my birthday…”

“I was feeling myself-I had a lot of drunk confidence that night.” He said. “I’m sober enough to know I won’t last…as long as we need so j-just do it. I’ll get you back.”

I felt a predatory glint enter my eye as I smiled at Sasuke. “Have you ever had the pleasure of a man inside you?” He had a confused, yet very curious smile on his lips. He spread his legs a little and I slipped in-between them, holding his chin with my thumb and pointer finger. I pulled his lips apart slightly, my tongue reaching out to swipe the bottom one.

“Yeah, every year I have to get that test done. Gosh.” His response was breathy as he whispered it into my ear. I paused, caught so off-guard, I burst out laughing.

“Dude, I was trying to be sexy.”

“I know, but I couldn’t hold that in.” I shook my head. “I’m sorry, I’m still a little drunk but I’ll try to be more serious. I just feel so relieved…I love you.”

“Yeah, and I love you and stuff, but my dick hurts.”

 “Romantic.” Sai said from the side of the couch.

 Both of us jumped at his presence. “What the fuck!” 

He didn’t even hesitate. Sai jumped over the side of the couch, locking Sasuke between his legs with his knees and he smiled at me from over his shoulder. “Um, Sai, Sasuke and I are trying to have a moment.”

He smiled even wider at me. “I know, that’s why I’m here. To enhance the moment.” Sasuke froze up in Sai’s arms and his eyes caught mine. “I propose that the three of us fulfill your dream.” Sasuke raised an eyebrow.

“What?” He turned to face Sai, but he froze up again when he felt Sai’s nose tracing up the column of his throat. I felt a light layer of sweat break out over my forehead thinking about the ‘dream’ as Sai called it.

“I don’t think that now is the time for that.” I replied, watching with rapt fascination.

“Are you gunna be upset if I elbow your roommate in the face?” Sasuke asked as he pulled his arm from the vice grip around him.

“I’ll be a little upset,” Sai said. “and it’ll definitely ruin the mood.”

“Naruto and I already had a bit of a mood established.” Sasuke tried to turn his face towards Sai but just ended up with another mouth on his. And I couldn’t look away. Sasuke sputtered. “What the fu-“

“You never told him!” Sai said with a too excited tone. “Can I tell him?”

I felt embarrassment gnawing at me and I looked away.

“Tell me what?”

“Oh, yes!” Sai wrapped his arms round Sasuke more, to make sure he was secure and wouldn’t be able to struggle. “Naruto’s always wanted to have a threesome!” And hearing out loud, I felt my face flush. Sasuke got quiet and settled down, looking between the two of us.

“I-I um,” I stumbled over my thoughts as Sasuke looked to me for answers. “When S-Sai and I were dating, there was this super cute guy in my teaching theory class.” I was talking too fast, stumbling over my words. “And Sai was like ‘lemme peep at him’ and he was like ‘yep, I approve’ and so we kinda planned to invite him to a threesome…”

“But Naruto chickened out, even though that dude totally wanted to bang you.” Sai said, his grip on Sasuke got tighter and the Uchiha looked even more uncomfortable with each passing second. “But now we have a second chance. And Sasuke is so pretty, I have been blessed.”

Sasuke was really quiet, and he straightened up. “I-is…is that what you want?” He asked it in such a quiet voice that I had to strain to hear him. Sai was looming over him, looking positively evil with his own excitement. “Beca-“ He cleared his throat, clearly forcing himself to be confident. “If that’s what you want, I’ll make sure you’ll be happy.”

“Really?” Part of me, a little voice deep inside was incredibly skeptical, and it told me to shut this down now, but my greedy side told me to keep going, see how much I could get. I nodded my head. “I’ve always been curious about it, yeah. But I don’t want you to be uncomfortable…”

“Who’s uncomfortable? We’re all friends!” Sai smiled widely.

Sasuke and I shared a look. But I moved closer to him. “If you’re okay with it, I’m going to continue.” Sasuke nodded as I pressed my lips against him. He leaned back against Sai’s chest and then lifted his arms as Sai pulled up his sweatshirt, making us break our kiss. Part of me was really not okay at all with Sai and Sasuke kissing, but that greedy part of me loved it. Mostly because it was pretty hot. Sai dipped his hand into the top of Sasuke’s jeans and I grabbed his wrist, feeling a sudden possessive wave of jealousy.

He looked at me, knowingly as he continued to kiss Sasuke. He didn’t even break the kiss but instead deepened it, moving his hand away. Sasuke whined and I moved into a better position between his legs. I leaned into his neck, breathing hotly against it before taking a small bit into my mouth to suck on it. Sasuke wrapped his legs around me, breaking the kiss with Sai to moan. I pulled at my own shirt, tossing it over my head, noticing for the first time it was getting too hot. 

When Sai reached into Sasuke’s pant this time, I didn’t stop him. Curiosity was taking over and I was getting too engrossed in the moment to really think about what this could mean for the three of us. Sai felt around and had a disappointed look on his face. “Sasuke, just relax.”

“This is a little weird for me.” He replied, hiding his face against Sai’s neck, embarrassed.

“It’s only weird if you make it so.” Sai replied, trying to pry Sasuke’s face away from his neck. He obviously wanted to kiss more but wasn’t getting the preferred reaction from Sasuke.

“Sai, now is not the time for your psycho-babble.” He shrugged, eyeing me with desire. I felt cocky as Sai didn’t bother to hide his desire for me. I felt like the king as I removed my lips from Sasuke’s neck. Sai smiled at me and I moved towards him, letting our lips connect as I reached between Sasuke’s legs.

But that’s when it hit Sai...

Sasuke punched him. My eyes widened and I started to howl with laughter. Sasuke’s face was red but it was because of anger, nothing else. But then a realization donned on him and he got embarrassed, sputtering as he looked back at Sai’s lifeless body. I mean he wasn’t dead or anything but he’d be out for a while. And I was gunna pass out too if I didn’t stop laughing. “Oh my godddddd.” I said, I started to cough.

“I’M SORRY, I DIDN’T MEAN TO!” Sasuke’s eyes were wide and he leaned up so we were face to face. I took a deep breath to calm myself and smiled.

“Oh man, don’t worry about it. Part of me was hoping you’d finish him Mortal Kombat style, I just didn’t think it would happen.”

“It just that…when he was kissing you, I-“ Sasuke closed his mouth and it thinned to a line. “I didn’t want to ruin this for you.”

I smiled again, kissing Sasuke on the cheek. “It’s okay. Honestly, I did get a little jealous when Sai kissed you too but I was being greedy. That’s too much to ask of you, and I know that now. And I want to make sure no one suffers the same fate as Sai.”

“He can still write about kissing me on his blog, though.” Sasuke commented as he looked over his shoulder at Sai who still showed no sign of waking up.

“You’re stupid.” I grabbed the long-forgotten blanket from the floor and wrapped Sasuke in it. I put on a movie for us to watch and Sasuke cuddled up against me, warming my naked skin. I kissed the top of his head. This was the punch-happy idiot I’d probably be spending the rest of my life with.   
\---

**A BRIEF TIMESKIP LATER**

 

My stomach rumbled while we drove down the snow-slicked roads of downtown. Sasuke had wanted to go on a date and since we were on winter break, it seemed like the perfect time. But part of me was really suspicious. Ever since we officially got back together, Sasuke hadn’t said a word about us getting married, which was completely opposite to his attitude he had when he first arrived. Not that I minded it. Planning a wedding sounded stressful.

We got out of the car and Sasuke immediately took my hand in his own. My fingers prinkled from the snow falling onto his gloves. Of course, he was ever practical with his outfit choice. I turned towards him and he stopped. I fixed the collar of his pea coat and pulled at the wrapping of his scarf, which he was totally using to cover up his hickies. What a hoe, right? I displayed that shit, let them know I got a hot ass man who punches people. Blessed with relationship goals.

I kissed him on the nose and he smirked. “If you wanna skip the date and go to a scary back alley to turn a couple tricks…” He trailed off and winked at me, making me laugh.

“Oh yeah, baby, I’ll slob all over that knob.” Sasuke laughed as I made the motion and noises. And that’s when I realized an older couple was walking by us, just staring in disbelief. I turned my head away from them, staring at Sasuke, who was still chuckling under his breath. “Shit, why didn’t you tell me there were people around?”

“Dobe, in public.”

“You act like I know what that is.” I rolled my eyes and Sasuke grabbed at my hand again. “You’re being needy.” He clicked his tongue at me and I started to hum, innocently. He muttered something like ‘fucking rude’ under his breath before dragging me towards our destination.  

I looked up from the rain soaked side walk to the bulbous observation deck of the Space Needle. Sasuke cleared his throat and smiled at me. “Ready to go up?”

“You do realize that I’ve lived in Seattle for many a year now, and the Space Needle is not new to me.”

His eyes immediately narrowed, mouth thinning into a line. I started humming nonchalantly to myself, keenly aware I just ruined the whole mood of our date. “I will leave you stranded in downtown.” Sasuke said with an annoyed smile. Pfft, jokes on you Sasuke, UW gives you a bus pass; it’s included in your tuition, duh. I rolled my eyes as Sasuke buys our tickets to go up.

Sasuke jingled his keys at me. “I am the key lord, today, not you.” He said with a snort, heading to the kiosk to buy our tickets. “You will be left by me and all my glory.”   
  
“Uh, okay then I’d just call your brother and have a good time with him because he’d be the new key lord. We’d get dim sum without you.”   
  
“Oh, dim sum does sound good.”   
  
“Shut the fuck up.” I laughed, slapping my leg with a huge smile on my face. “See? I’m trying to help the team. If you’re the key lord and I’m king of suggestions.”   
  
“We’ll get dim sum…” Sasuke shoved my ticket into my hand, “After we go up, your majesty.” I rolled my eyes and followed him.  
  
Even though I’ve seen it many times and have traversed its heights, there’s something mystical about standing at the base of the Space Needle. And now was honestly the perfect time because it was just gently snowing so when you looked up, there were tiny little flecks of snow dropping in silence against the shimmer of glass and metal. Sasuke took my hand in his which startled me because his gloves were slightly damp against my bare skin.  
  
It was so weird to think people actually traveled to Washington to visit this place; it bogles my mind how things we see every day and think are mundane, attract others with careless finesse.   
  
We boarded, alone, surprisingly. The ride up wasn’t as smooth as you’d expect, but elevators aren’t exactly perfect. Plus, you go up so far that the wind can actually effect your ride; my stomach prickled with excitement and nervousness. You know, because you always have the worst-case scenario at the back of your mind…Where the elevator falls and you survive because you need to have that tragic ‘love-lost’ story to help with your already tragic, anime backstory…  
  
Sorry Sasuke…  
  
I laughed a little to myself.   
  
“What?”  
  
I turned my head slightly. “Oh nothing, I promise.”   
  
I stared out the glass and watched as everyone started to shrink and the buildings became eye level. Seattle was truly beautiful at night; when all the city lights were sprinkling the skylines with like stars. Even the blue and green Seahawks’ lights were a welcomed sight. The glass on the buildings twinkled as we ascended and different layers of light bounced off of them.   
  
What I loved the most was looking at the blend of modernism and the classical brick and mortar. Skeletons made of steel wrapped with glass skin next to strong holds of brick, red and rusty; the old blood of the city. But when you’ve seen a few a hundred or more times, you become bored of it. There are some subtleties you miss every time but once that information processes, your mind starts to wander around. That’s what it’s like when you step foot on UW’s campus: beautiful old buildings next to recently updates ones, wrapped in glass and lighting features.   
  
Sasuke cleared his throat to get my attention, but I didn’t turn around right away.   
  
“So, what do you think?”  
  
I scoffed. “Ohh, the Space Needle. I’m so impressed. I can see the EMP from here…” the motion of the elevator made me start to feel a little queasy especially when I looked down to the ground. Then a thought donned on me, cause Sasuke was being awfully quiet…and weird.   
  
“Sasuke, if I turn around and you’re proposing, I’m rejecting you.”  
  
I flipped around quickly to see Sasuke on his knee, ring out. “Damn it, Dobe.”  
  
“The Space Needle, dude? That's so cliché! Where’s the passion? The zing….you're face-timing your parents right now, aren't you?”   
  
Sasuke looked down at his phone. “No…?”  
  
_“I’m also here in case Otouto blew it.”_  
  
I started laughing as Sasuke fumbled to turn off his phone, getting paler from embarrassment. I walked over to him, leaning down to kiss him on the forehead. “I mean, it was sweet- the thought. But, not even close to the right place.”  
  
Sasuke rolled his eyes as I wrapped my arms around his neck, kissing him gently on the eyelids and he turned his head away, trying not to smile. “Where do you wanna go?”  
  
“Din Tai Fung, so I can get dim sum.”   
  
“First of all, I am not going all the way back to UW for dim sum. Secondly, not the right answer. I’ve been trying for to figure out where to propose to you for two months, give me a fucking hint.”  
  
“Fremont Troll.”  
  
“You’re kidding.”  
  
“Oh, I thought you wanted to get married…”  
  
Sasuke rolled his eyes. “Google a dim sum restaurant close by so we can have a full stomach when I have to drive all the way out to Fremont.”

\-----

Itachi picked up his phone, sipping at his lukewarm peppermint latte. He was only slightly peeved that Sasuke had hung up on them. He’d goad Sasuke about it later on when his parents weren’t bickering about where Sasuke should have proposed: his father seemed convinced the Ferris wheel on the pier would have done the trick; his mother suggested a trip to New York.

Itachi smirked, bemused when he looked at a picture, obviously saved from snapchat that had been posted on Facebook a few moments ago. A copy had also been sent to him. Naruto waving a silver band on his finger, smiling, in Sasuke’s arms on the Fremont trolls head. “Finally,” he muttered.

Not even a moment after he had locked his phone did he receive a phone call. Not even bothering to check his called I.D. Itachi answered. “Yes, Otouto, very proud of you for not blowing it this time.”

 _“Wrong Uchiha and relation, cousin.”_ Itachi felt his heartbeat pick up and his skin prink at the sound of the voice.

“Shisui?”

\----------

**B-b-b-b-b-BONUS SCENE**

“Sasuke,” I complained laying directly onto his chest. “Dude, my dude, stop grading papers.”

“You’re the one who wanted to come over, even though I told you I was busy. Itachi is pretending to be sick again.” I let out the longest, most exasperated sigh in the world. He looked at me from the tops of his glasses. “Unattractive.” He said as he wrote the score for someone’s test up in the corner of the paper. He removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose, actually looking more annoyed than I had planned. He gave me the side eye and I raised an eyebrow.

“Is there something wrong? I didn’t think my usual antics would be so annoying.”

“It’s not that.” He placed his glasses down on Itachi’s coffee table with the stack of graded paper’s next to it. It was an impressive stack but considering there were four hundred people in Itachi’s physics class, I wouldn’t be surprised if there were two hundred tests right there. Which meant Gaara would be busy for the next few days…and Sai would be even more annoying than usual. “Naruto, focus, please.”

“Yep, sorry. I was just thinking that I was gunna be staying with you and Itachi for a couple days.”

“By all means.” Itachi said as he walked through the living room, a Starbucks cup clutched tightly in his fingers. He sat in the arm chair next to us, grabbing the graded pile of papers, pulling out his own pen. Sasuke looked unhappy as Itachi crossed out his point totals.

“Itachi, trying to have a moment with Naruto.”

Itachi waved Sasuke off, pointing back towards the spare bedroom where Sasuke was staying. “That’s nice. This is my house.”

Sasuke rolled his eyes. So, I gave my attempt. “What if I wanted to just hop up and ride Sasuke’s dick?”

Itachi only briefly looked up at me. “Oh please, nothing either of you have could phase me. I’ve seen worse in the Suzzalo Library, I promise. I’d be perfectly fine if you two wanted to…Canoodle, as the young kids say.”

“Young kids do not say anything close to that.”

“’Canoodle my noodle’ is gunna be the only thing on my Grindr profile.” Itachi and I looked at each other, wagging our eyebrows at each other.

“Itachi, please!” Sasuke was getting even more grumpy than usual but Itachi refused to move. He blew all the air out of his nose and turned towards me; I knew I wasn’t helping but he didn’t need to look at me like I had greatly offended his greatest ancestor, fucking chill.

“Do you really not remember our promise?” He blurted out. “That has been bothering me since your birthday, I need to know.”

“Yeah, nope. I don’t remember anything about that.” Sasuke looked dejected, staring down at the floor.

“To be fair,” Itachi chimed in, “You didn’t remember until you were twenty-one, so how about you chill with your crazy.”

“T-E-L-L M-E, please.” I spelled out for him. “You can’t expect me to remember shit from seven years ago that even you forgot.”

“Right before I left for college, we went to Kiba’s graduation party, remember that?” I nodded my head. “We had a couple drinks and then we went out to Kiba’s balcony because you said you needed some air because you had the spins.” I didn’t remember that at all but I still nodded. “There you told me you loved me, blah, blah, but then before you would go inside you made me promise if we were still single at twenty-five, we’d get married.”

I was silent, mostly because that did sound like something I would say and something I would do. Back then, I was super pushy and a little bit of a brat. Plus, Sasuke and I were breaking up in like a month so of course I was still holding out the most hope. I sighed. “I really don’t remember that.”

“HOW THOUGH?!” Sasuke raised his voice and Itachi looked at him with side eyes, causing him to calm down. I laughed a little as he folded his arms across his chest. “When I came to visit you on your twenty-first birthday, you pulled me aside, when you were drunk, and told me I was four years too early.”

I looked at him, narrowing my eyes as I racked my brain. I feel like I knew exactly what Sasuke was talking about, but there was something else there, a little fringe at the edge of this memory that wasn’t fully expanded upon because I had buried it with years of college and drinking.

Wait…

“Renting a car.” I replied, pointing at Sasuke. “I said that because right before I pulled you aside, I was talking to Kiba about you being too young to rent a car, which is why you had Itachi’s.”

He just stared at me, face completely blank. “You mean, I remembered our promise out of pure coincidence because of diction.”

“Semantics.” Itachi muttered with an approving nod. “Words phrasing can be a very powerful trigger.”

"English is a cruel mistress." I agreed. 

“But you kissed me!” Sasuke accused, watching my face. I turned away, shrugging.

“Drunk Naruto kinda does what he wants…” I replied with a nervous smile. “I probably was feeling super good and I was like ‘oh Sasuke’s here’ and I kissed you without really thinking about it. I honestly don’t even really remember kissing you either, I actually thought nothing happened between us that night.”

Sasuke raised his arms, slapping them down at his sides forcefully. “I immediately broke up with my boyfriend back east after your birthday, I never let that night go and you just forgot?!?!”

“Obviously if he couldn’t keep your attention, he wasn’t worth your time anyway, Otouto.” Itachi commented.

We were all silent for a moment as Sasuke stewed with his realization, looking like he had been played-which of course, not my intention at all, but this is what happens when you assume people know or remember the same things you do. You end up getting fucked up…

He looked over at me for answers to questions he seemed to annoyed to ask. I felt sweat building up on my brow. “Uhhh-“ I looked at Itachi for support but he was just smiling evilly over his stack of papers, encouraging conflict with the look on his face. “Uhh, we’re together now, right? Things worked out for the best?” I smiled sheepishly and Sasuke turned away from me, shaking his head.

“I feel so lame.” He muttered.

“You should. Sentimentality is disgusting. Not very Uchiha at all.”

Before Sasuke lost his life by throwing his pen at Itachi, I grabbed his arm and made him look at me. “Who cares about that stupid promise anyway? We’re together now, maybe not married, yet, but together. That’s more than enough for me.”

Sasuke’s face flushed and he leaned in, kissing me. I nuzzled his neck. “I love you, regardless.” He muttered and I kissed his neck.

 “Love you, too, you un-Uchiha sentimental bastard.”

 

  **THE END.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WILL SOMEONE MAKE A FAKE TUMBLR AND RUN IT AS SAI'S FUCKING BLOG BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE 10/10 LIT??!?!
> 
>  
> 
> Part of me is so relieved this is finished but also like...Really sad because i didn't write the wedding or the Itachi-Sai-Shisui subplot(and i wont before anyone asks). This has been such a pleasure to write and it started from such humble beginnings: a fucking poll on my fanficiton profile. I've been overwhelmed by everyone's support and love for this story. And I'm happy to have finally brought you all the end of this story...Even though it took my a very long time to complete(Which i do apologize for). Anyway, i hope you guys enjoyed the journey. I look forward to writing for you again, YA BOI HITOKO-SAMA


	7. ALTERNATE ENDING

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An alternative ending to Promises-most of the content is the same, but the last scenes have been altered. NOW INCLUDING A LEMON :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I know in the previous chapter I basically said that I was done with this story. Of course, being the lying asshole that I am, I lied-obvs. I was amazed by everyone's feedback and how honest y'all were(this also includes the feedback from FF.net too). And one things that stood out to me was the mixed reception the ending got-not saying that people were totally trashing it or anything-but some rather good points were made about the ending so I decided that maybe it would be in my best interest to post a second-alternate version with the lemon and actual proposal.   
> So these are the things that have changed:   
> 1\. The lemon gag has been removed. So sorry the sexy triangle and punch are not in this chapter.   
> 2\. The ShuiIta has also been removed: Just cause it hinted at a sequel I would not write(maybe), unless someone locked me in a dark ass room with some lays lightly salted as my own company and a computer with no access to internet.   
> 3\. Instead of the 3rd person narration, I wrote out the Fremont Troll moment. 
> 
> So yeah, enjoy. 
> 
> This is unbeta'ed: I finished it and now i'ma post it. Be gentle with me.

Between supplementary material and a pile of books, I sat regretting my own flawed logic. How the fuck was I supposed to get any work done when Sasuke’s loom-y presence was lurking around. My fingers were twitching for God’s sake. You can’t take notes with twitchy hands-especially not me- my handwriting was subpar, at best.

I have the brief thought of barging into Sai’s room and harassing him, to distract myself from Sasuke’s eventual and pertinent call, but, from the not-really-music-dubstep-electro-hipster-trance music, Sai’s working on a painting or a drawing. One thing I remember so well from our relationship was sitting in his “studio” and just watching him. He would wear old, paint covered jeans and an old, way too big tie dye shirt, his hands would be smudged with charcoal or he’d be making delicate strokes with a perfect blend of color.

Of course, I’d be waiting and watching because break time was generally also sex time but sometimes it was nice to watch him work.

I grabbed my notes from the top of the stack of the supplements, trying desperately to cling to my words instead of my thoughts. I got the call right after my class that I would be substituting for a different girl in my department. She was going on maternity leave a quarter earlier than she had planned. Apparently, I was the only person in the entire department who had the schedule to match hers. I sighed, defeated. Kakashi had totally goaded me with the idea of a challenge.  Plus, she’d been more than accommodating to my current schedule, going as far as to drop off her notes, every single book she used for the class-which were just destroyed with sticky notes-, and a list of movies.

I slapped my own copies of the novels open and started to re-read my notes. I started to rip apart new sticky notes and mark sections in my copies, trying to flag moments she and I both noticed, building my theme for the book…

Generally, when one teaches this class, because it’s a senior capstone, the students do most of the the thesis and them work for you…and come up with some pretty great thoughts. With the right direction.

Which means a lot of the same thoughts will be covered in the same movements of narrative. And I really don’t want to be the gay TA who teaches about queer theory and homosocial normalization…

Or sexism.

I decided that maybe my time would be better spent watching one of the movies she gave me. At least then I could moderately zone out but also been keenly aware of what was happening on screen.

I slipped Double Indemnity into my PS3 and turned off the lights in the kitchen. I wrapped a blanket around my shoulders and settled in. I’d take notes my second watch, if anything this was just for pleasure.

It was gunna be really hard not to talk about sexism…because Jesus christ how could you not? They used to treat women like garbage, no wonder the femme Fatale was such a popular trope…

I grabbed my notes pad and wrote “CREATING THE FEMME FATALE->DEMONIZATION OF WOMEN CREATING AGENCY”.

DAMN I’M GOOD. Didn’t even take like an hour and I got a theme for the class. I’m fucking amazing.

 _“’Shut up and kiss me’.”_ I couldn’t hold back a laugh at that line. Oh man, I forgot that those tropes existed for a reason…AND PEOPLE THOUGHT SHIT LIKE THIS WAS ROMANTIC.

I shook my head, but then a thought loomed on me. Sasuke and I kinda had a relationship like that, didn’t we? We tried to bury protest with silence and physical affection…

Which means that if this was Noir, Sasuke would totally be my femme fatale, wrecking up my life but also my last real temptation. I could see it all now…

_The rain fell in a hazy mist around us, only illuminated by the street lamps. The rim of my hat kept the top part of Sasuke’s beautiful face out of my view. I tried to walk past him but he grabbed me by the wrist turning me around. He was glaring, flicking my hat up so I could look into his eyes. “Ya just gunna leave? Just like that? Not a word more?”_

_“Oh like how youse left me? Going off to ya fancy college. I don’t need ya, youse just gunna hurt me again.”_

_“Don’t talk like that, yeah? Youse really think I meant to hurt ya like that? That being away from ya was easy on me. I love ya, ya crazy dame. I’ve always loved ya, not even distance could keep ya outta my thoughts, get me?”_

_He grabbed me around the waist, our chests pressed together. He knocked the hat off my head, letting the misty droplets settle and bead up in my hair and on my forehead. “I’ve been waiting for the right time to have ya again. I won’t let ya get away again, even if I have to follow ya yo the end of the earth.” He kissed my forehead. “You’ll do the same, right?”_

_“Sasuke, ya ever stray again I’ll break both ya fucking legs, and drag ya back if I gotta.” Sasuke’s lips curled up against my forehead._

_"Youse a crazy one, but damn it if that doesn’t make ya nice and ripe. Not, be a good boy and lemme pick ya. I’ve waited long enough for ya cherries.”_

_"_ Why the fuck did I turn into the girl in my own fantasy?” I muttered to myself.

“No need to fantasize about me anymore. I have arrived.” Sasuke said. I nearly jumped to the ceiling, throwing my blanket and papers everywhere.

“WHAT THE FUCK! YOU FUCKING SERIAL ROBBER, STOP INVITING YOURSELF IN.”

Sasuke seemed to ignore my outburst, walking into the kitchen to grab something. “just so you know, I didn’t let myself in. Sai let me in cause you didn’t answer when I knocked…cause you were fantasizing…” I felt my cheeks heat up, looking away from him as he came back into the living room with two glasses. He put a bag on the table and patted the stop next to him. “I brought vodka to take the edge off.” Sasuke cracked up a bottle of V8 for himself and threw me a bottle of Dr. Pepper.

I sighed, sitting down next to him. Bless him for knowing I needed a couple shots to slow down my thoughts.

Wait…

“Isn’t this a bad idea? I have no filter.” I said looking over at Sasuke. He shrugged.

“More honest that way. Plus the probability we bang goes up enough for me to take the risk.”

“If this is all a ploy to get me naked, I assure you there are easier ways.”

“Naruto, when we were sixteen you chugged one beer and immediately ripped off your pants. I think I know what I’m doing.”

“In my defense,” I said, raising a finger. “It was summer and it was fucking ungodly hot.”

Sasuke hummed thoughtfully as he put his drink to his lips. “I see your point and raise you seventeenth birthday and the field incident. It was October.”

“Umm,” I scoffed. “The obvious explanation for that is I wanted to go streaking in the cemetery to see if I could impress some ghosts and get super powers. Duh. Fucking peasant how could you not want that?”

“Would have been cursed, for sure.” Sasuke crossed himself, through wrong way I might add. I’ve seen Austin Powers enough to know spectacles, testicles, wallet, and watch. God, what a loser.

“First of all, you did that wrong. Two, dick is so impressive, definitely would have been blessed with powers.”

“Care to let me judge?”

“Are you already drunk or something?” I questioned, pushing his face so that he was sitting on the other side of the couch. “I’m not drunk enough yet.”

“Get on my level.” He said toasting me.

“How much have you eaten today?”

Sasuke laughed, rolling his eyes. He sat forward. “Naruto, we’re in college. We don’t eat.”

“Yeah, true.” I said pulling my laptop into my lap.

“I’m making your drink for you.” Sasuke commented.

“Three fingers.” I replied; I heard him suddenly stop pouring. He definitely made my drink too strong. Asshole. “I’m getting pizza.”

“I want-“

“Extra sauce, extra tomatoes, light cheese, regular olives and green peppers.”

“And you didn’t want to get married.” I tried not to smile as Sasuke toasted me again. I shrugged. “You getting your meat lovers?”“Uh, yes. Don’t you know, I love meat in my mouth.”

He muttered something like “could have fooled me” and I smacked him with one of the throw pillows that Sai insisted we get. “Okay,” I leaned back with my way too strong drink and Sasuke slowly moved over to me, throwing his arm around my shoulder. At first, I resisted the cuddle because I refused to give in to the warmth of his body and all that it meant, but he smelled good and my face started to warm up from the alcohol.

\-------

I finished off my second drink and my third slice of pizza when Sasuke looked over at me. He only had a little color to his face which meant he was feeling good, but wasn’t obliterated. Now would be a good time to just completely unload on him and ruin his mood. I opened my mouth to say something when he flicked a piece of sausage at me. It hit me right in the cheek and my eyes widened in both confusion and shock. That fucking bitch. He caught me so off-guard, little fucking asshole.

I couldn’t contain my laughter. I tried to be mad that he had turned into a five year old but I couldn’t it was too funny.

“Dude, fuck off.” I couldn’t breathe, Sasuke ripped the crust from between his lips. I punched him in the arm as he scooted away from me, trying not to choke on his bite of food.

He swallowed. “What? We all know you love meat near your face.”

I coughed from laughing. “You’re stupid.” I complained. He grabbed my hand and we started to play fight, or at least what I thought was us play fighting until he yanked me into his side of the couch. I raised an eyebrow at his sudden closeness, wondering just when we had crossed the barrier into each other’s space. His face looked so serious as he leaned into me.

“I missed you.” He muttered against my lips.

“Sasuke?” Our mouths met and he tasted like an overload of tomato, which is definitely not the taste you want after a romantic confession. I shook away from him but he held firm, kissing me with need. God damn that mouth, sucking me in and washing away my resolve. I couldn’t help myself and started to kiss back. He tried to lay me back on the couch, but I knew if I let him get that far, I wouldn’t be able to stop him. We still needed to talk, not our stupid back and forths. I pulled back from him. “If you missed me, you could have come back.” I said, despondent from the small cold shock in my chest.

“You could have come out.” He replied, testily I might add. He even had an eyebrow cocked as if that reply was obvious. “I actually thought you’d surprise me with that one.”

“So, I had to pick up my life and move? But you, who already had a life here, couldn’t stay?” I folded my arms across my chest. We separated, giving each other space. “Why is it that I have to be the one who does the grand, romantic gestures?” 

“You’re always the impulsive…explosive one.” He said, as though…YES, OKAY it’s obviously me, but that doesn’t mean I’m always impulsive and don’t think things through. Jerk. “I figured it may have been in your bag of tricks.”

“That’s stupid. What would I have done when I got there? I didn’t get into college out there, hell, I didn’t even apply. You never told me you were going to leave until a few months before! How the fuck am I supposed to be all…Mr. Spontaneous when I can’t even plan for it!”

“You rarely plan for anything-you always flew the by the seat of your pants. I loved that about you, I never knew what to expect. I would have taken care of you.”

My eyes narrowed. “I’m not a fucking house wife or your damn pet. I don’t want you to take care of me.” I raised my hand taking a deep breath as Sasuke looked away from me, knowing he’d lost that one. “Which goes back to-why the fuck does it have to be me? You could have come back _three years ago_ and we wouldn’t be sitting here arguing; we’d probably be married by now.”

“You were with _him,_ ” Sasuke shook his head, exasperated. I could feel myself sobering because of the heat and blood pumping in my head. I had to stop and swallow the rage bubbling up in my throat. “I didn’t want you to feel like you had to choose me if I came back, so I made it easy for you.”

“Why the fuck would you think that? Sasuke, news flash, I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you for years. Sure, we may not have gotten back together right away but I still would have been happy see you, feel you, just-just…God, why would you think I wouldn’t want you, no matter what?”

“Because I was depressed.” Sasuke replied. He was completely silent for a moment and he looked away. “I didn’t even want me-to be me. I was miserable, so I felt that you didn’t want me too, which is why you were happy with someone else.” He shrugged, sighing. “The closest thing I found to a relationship-a functional one- was with the lesbian chick I worked with at that shitty gas station.”

“You worked at a gas station?”

“Yeah, I had to, fucking mom and dad were like ‘oh Sasuke, we’re paying your tuition but we’re not gunna pay for the rest of your expenses.’ So, I had to get a job, and go to school full time to keep my scholarship. And I needed that stupid scholarship even though it only covered like half of my tuition each year because out of state tuition is _crazy_ expensive.” He took a sip of his drink and I sat back with my still empty glass in hand considering the last little sip at the bottom. I decided to make myself another one, only half full. “And they basically told me: find an apartment and some roommates because they didn’t want to pay for on-campus housing.”

“Your parents are asshole, we know that.”

“Not mom, dad. She wanted to help me more, but dad was still pissed that he was paying for Itachi’s grad school on top of my out-of-state tuition.”

“Aren’t they the ones who pushed you both to go to college?”

“YES. Thank you, _god_. My main point, like don’t fucking push me to go to a good fucking school if you don’t wanna pay for it.” Sasuke shook his head. “They also shouldn’t have been paying for Itachi to go to grad school anyway. You don’t even apply for FAFSA with your parents’ info then. I mean, yeah, dad’s got hella family money and we own like three businesses and do well, but still-.”

“And you still didn’t learn that it’s ‘Itachi and I’.” Sasuke looked at me like he was going to kill me.

Sasuke held up his hand. “Anyway, I had a lot on my plate back East. I just couldn’t handle it properly so all I did was: barely sleep, barely eat, went to class, went to work, studied-so I didn’t have time to feel sad or sorry for myself. And repeat. And then Orochimaru happened, on top of everything else-and that rocked my confidence. ‘Oh good, another means of comparison to my brother’, ‘only creepy old men want to sleep with me, great’, ‘what if my professors are giving me these opportunities because they want to fuck me too?’.”

“Sasuke, why didn’t you tell me?” I grabbed his hand but he pulled away from me.

“I didn’t want you to think I was just complaining to you about my privileges and opportunities-I felt like I shouldn’t complain because I should have been grateful.” He put his glass down on the coffee table, finally turning back towards me, as if to gauge my reaction. I put my hand on his shoulder, smiling.

“You’ve always been like this. So. Fucking. Stubborn.” I rolled my eyes, shoving him back.

“The pot calling the kettle black.”

I raised an eyebrow. “You’re never completely honest about your feelings. It’s okay to complain about your problems, dude. Just because you have good opportunities doesn’t mean you can’t feel fucking overwhelmed. I wouldn’t have been able to do that- I couldn’t. I would suffocate in that environment. I mean, you did it-lived every moment of it- and it made you fucking miserable. I wouldn’t want someone else to experience that. I’m proud of you for staying as strong as you did-basically without help too… ‘Cause you didn’t want to tell me anything.” I added for good measure. Sasuke’s lips tightened and he rolled his eyes. Sasuke’s face was slightly flushed. He leaned forward, laying his forehead on my shoulder.

He started laughing, wrapping his arms around me. “And that was just undergrad, too.” I started laughing and he pulled back. “But I guess we have plenty of time for you to tell me I’m stupid.”

I pulled back for a second, looking away. We were silent and let it settle over us before Sasuke cleared his throat. “Your turn.”

I raised an eyebrow. “What are you talking about? This is all you, dude. I’m fine.”

Sasuke gave me the most skeptical look I’ve ever seen in my life, scoffing at me. “Bullshit. If there was no issue, you would have taken the ring when I proposed. But you’re vehemently against us.”

“Am not. I just didn’t think it was practical.”

“No, that’s not it.”

“I was trying to be an adult about this, dude. Like we haven’t been together for years, things are-“ I trailed off and Sasuke looked at me, confused.

“Different?” He supplied. “Of course, they’re different, it’s been seven years. But we still haven’t really changed- in my case, at least.”

“Then….” I raised my voice to him and then got quiet. “Then why does…”

“What?”

“Everything feels…” I motioned between us. “It feels so similar and that makes me secure, and that’s when I slip up. I have expectations, and I know, deep down, it’s stupid for me to give you those expectations and make you live up to them. Like you said, things aren’t the same. But it _feels_ so… _Similar_ , I-I get confused.” I shook my head, trying to clear up all the words buzzing in my head like bees, overwhelming me.

“I won’t deny that it feels good to be with you Sasuke, physical or not, I missed you…Everything about you, even the stuff that used to piss me off.” I stopped, head feeling fuzzy as I tried to articulate my thoughts. It was all starting to come up at once, all the blurring of the lines and the feelings, bad, good, and in between. Memories flashed, old and recent. Everything came up. “But then, why do I feel so anxious? Why am I so angry? I was so happy to see you, I was so happy when you told me you loved me and gave me a ring. It’s like I’m waiting to wake up from a dream…I’ve thought about this moment so much that, I just…I’m disappointed?” I felt tears building up in my eyes and I tried to take a breath to calm myself but my breath shook with the rawness of my emotions. Sasuke pulled me into his arms. “Why can’t I get over it? I want to be with you so badly, why can’t I let the old us go? We’re not dead, so why?”

“I know exactly what you’re feeling.” Sasuke said in a whisper. I throw my arms around him so I can just have something to hold onto. My heart is racing and I feels like I could fall into something, I don’t know what it is, but I need him to ground me. His hands moved against my back, rubbing little circles. “It’s hard because _we_ haven’t changed much since we were eighteen, there may be stories we haven’t told each other and a new quirk here or there, but we’re the same people. But things outside of us have changed, our relationship has changed. We’re estranged.” My fingers tightened in his sweatshirt.

“Naruto, listen, look.” He pulled back from me, forcing me to look at him. “Things fall apart.” He said that with such finality that I tried to pull away from him and for some reason, I couldn’t help but feel a fear that this was going to be it. I couldn’t get over us, he wouldn’t stop leaving. This wasn’t going to work. I started to breathing in, panic constricting my chest. “But I’m here. I’m real, Naruto. Look at me.”  He touched my face then, cupping my cheek and gently wiping the tear falling from my eye with his thumb. “I may not have lived up to your dreams of how this would be and I may not be the best guy to live your life with, but I’m not leaving again. We’ll piece each other back together.”

“How do I know that? How can you be so sure!? You’re so sure about everything, why am I not reassured? I don’t get it Sas-“ He kissed me then, so gently. The press of his lips against mine wiped away all the lingering sadness in my stomach, and let me feel warm in his arms.

“Because it’s you.” He pressed his forehead against mine, his eyes were closed. “It’s always been you. That how I know. You tell me everything I need to hear, because you know me, and you understand me and my feelings. Itachi knows everything about what happened while I was gone and he tried, bless him, he tried to articulate that he was proud of me and that he was sorry for what happened, but it’s not who we are as people. You bring it out in me, you make me honest. And I know better now.” He paused, wrapping his arms around my chest. “Because I love you, and I tried to get over you, I tried to leave you, but I love you too much. I couldn’t come back home then because I would get stuck here-you’re here and-”

“If you try to leave again, I’ll lock you in my torture basement.” I wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my face into the crook. His scent overwhelmed me. 

“So, in Itachi’s basement.” There was a smile in his voice and I laughed, feeling even more tears springing up and dripping down my cheeks.  

“You’re stupid.” I muttered, kissing against his neck. “At least you’re stupid and pretty. So lucky.” I said sardonically, making Sasuke huff with laughter.

“I missed you.” He said, again.

“I missed you, too.” I felt my voice catch for a moment and I pulled him into my arms, my heart was racing. “I missed you so much-I was scared we were gunna fuck this up. I was scared we weren’t going to give this another try. I almost cried earlier when I thought about us being over…for good.”

“It’s not going to be the same.” Sasuke said quietly, “Not like the first time.”

“Oh thank god, our first time was so disappointing.”

“Shut up, I hadn’t watched enough porn yet to figure out exactly what I was doing. I got better.”

“Yeah, I know. A lot better.”

Sasuke pulled back, the heat not leaving his face from earlier, but it was different this time. It was a darker shade of red and he panted in breathy wisps, too warm on my cheeks. I could feel my lower half stir, “Should I show you my improved technique?”

“This isn’t a science fair, dude.”

“That’s usually where people show off their anatomy though.”

“Damn Sasuke, that was a good one.”

“Just shut up and kiss me, damn it.”

I tried not to laugh when he pushed me back into the couch, not hesitating to slips his tongue between my slightly parted lips. Relief was flooding over me and also arousal. I missed this too. With him being so close, his scent was so strong, his taste too pure, I moaned. I spread my legs so he could settle in, but instead, he pulled me up, trying to readjust so I was going to lay on his chest.

“What are you doing?” I muttered between kisses. “J-just hurry up, I want you inside me.” I pushed up his sweatshirt with my hand, finally feeling that smooth skin against my hand. He shivered.

“No, not this time. You’re gunna need to…” He pulled back and I raised an eyebrow.

“D-do you have whisky dick?” I whispered.

“No, I don’t have whisky dick.” His face was still flushed but it got a lot darker and he couldn’t look at me. “I-“ He cleared his throat. “I haven’t had sex in like…eight months so I don’t want to disappoint you.”

“But on my birthday…”

“I was feeling myself-I had a lot of drunk confidence that night.” He said. “I’m sober enough to know I won’t last…as long as we need so j-just do it. I’ll get you back.”

I felt a predatory glint enter my eye as I smiled at Sasuke. “Have you ever had the pleasure of a man inside you?” He had a confused, yet very curious smile on his lips. He spread his legs a little and I slipped in-between them, holding his chin with my thumb and pointer finger. I pulled his lips apart slightly, my tongue reaching out to swipe the bottom one.

He smirked at me, leaning up to brush our noses together. “Are you threatening me with a good time?” I sealed our lips together and I felt something I hadn’t felt in a long time. A spark. It made me shudder with the sudden excitement of Sasuke’s lips against mine. He moaned into my mouth as we sloppily exchanged tongue-it was wet and I couldn’t help but slurp his tongue, sucking and drawing it into my mouth. He whimpered, hands shaking as he pulled at my shirt.

It all happened in a flash, the pulling on my clothes, them leaving my body, and then the same happening with Sasuke’s clothes. It was hot, the connecting skin of our bodies were slick with sweat as I rubbed my erection into him. He didn’t even bother to hide his pleasure, nails digging into my back, his hot whispers against my shoulder as I thrusted against him. I pulled away slightly, the heat and soft licks of pleasure making me light headed. Between my teeth, I caught some of the pale skin on his neck, bruising it as I sucked it into my mouth. He muttered something I couldn’t quite make out and wrapped his legs around my waist. “Naruto, please.”

My hands brushed down Sasuke’s sides and they wrapped around his thighs, pulling them apart. He had to untangle himself from me just to make the maneuver work but he was obviously too gone to really care. He was hard, his erection pressing hotly into my thigh. I shivered. Of course, tonight was the night he wanted to receive. Damn brat.

Kissing down his chest, his fingers wove into my hair, pulling gently at it when I stopped to suck on his nipples. I swirled my tongue around each of them, giving them a long, hard suck before changing between them. “A little lower…” He muttered, looking at me with an incredibly heated expression. I raised an eyebrow-what the fuck did he mean a little lower? You can’t go lower on a nipple?

He made a motion with his head and pointed with his eyes down to his cock, which was dripping wet, red with the lack of contact.  “So, you want me to touch you here?” I barely touched him, barely swept my fingers across the skin. He shivered, hard, looking at me with such desire I felt my breath catch in my throat. Sasuke was gorgeous-maybe I’ve never really noticed it. Well, okay, I am fully aware of how good looking he is-but sometimes, when its just us talking, it doesn’t matter-I forget. So, when I can actually watch his face, just take in everything that is his physical body, I get caught up in just how beautiful he is.

Which makes me-lowkey-even more annoyed that he’s making me the man. Maybe my lazy ass wanted to just watch him make all those sexy faces while he makes me his noble steed in our adventure to pleasure town. I am a simple man with simple goals. A thought donned on me then, and I caught Sasuke’s eyes. He raised a curious eyebrow, probably from the very sneaky, satisfied look on my face. “Should I be concerned?” I shook my head. Sasuke did not look convinced.

“Don’t worry babe, there’s nothing to be concerned about.”

“First of all,” I couldn’t help but start laughing, which made the serious look on Sasuke’s face falter. “don’t call me babe.” I kissed the taut muscles of his stomach, right above where his happy trail started. He tried to keep his voice from shaking, “and you made a hella suspicious face, you can’t just tell me not to worry.”

Just so I wouldn’t reveal my evil plan too early, I quickly sucked his cock into my mouth without warning. He gasped, clutching at my scalp harshly. I pulled off, “Ay, I am not trying to go bald and the early age of twenty-five okay? Be gentle with the goods.” He ignored me and pressed his cock right against my mouth to part my lips. It slipped through my teeth and hit the back of my throat-tear sprung up in my eyes and I tried not to choke on it. I glared up at him and he just continued to thrust into my mouth-not even the hole I wanted to be fucked like that! Fucking shit head. I reached between his legs and brushed my fingers against his hole. He stopped thrusting so I could swirl my finger teasingly against it, putting more and more pressure against it with every pass. He moaned loudly, letting go of his hair to reach behind him and grab at the fabric of the couch. “Sasuke, you better not be just being bold and brazen like this cause you’re drunk.” He smirked, his head still turned to the side. “I expect you to be putting in the finest of work every time we’re laying pipe.”

I could feel Sasuke’s rumble of laughter through my chest even from where I was laying between his legs. “Don’t call it that.” He said, eyeing me with a tiny smile on his lips.

“But like when I’m betwixt your butt cheeks, you’re not even going to care that I’m redoing your entire sewage system.”

“ _Naruto, stop_.” Sasuke laughed hard as he sat up, pulling himself away from me. “You said ‘betwixt my butt cheeks,’ oh my lord, I don’t know if I’m going to let you ‘lay pipe’,”

I sat up quickly, grabbing both of Sasuke’s hands in mine, holding them tightly. I looked him in the eye, a small flush creeping across his cheeks as the moment turned very serious. “Sasuke,” I began. I could feel his fingers twitch in my own, adding its own anxiousness to the moment, “lemme smash.”

“You just looked me in my own two eyes and said that to me, didn’t you?” I burst out laughing and Sasuke pulled a hand free to point to his face, trying to pull Sasuke into my chest but he pushed at me, pulling his hands away from me. I pushed him into the arm of the couch, covering his body with my own. I kissed his face, pulling at the offensive hands which tried to prevent me from capturing his lips.

“Come on, give me a kiss.” Sasuke put his arms down, letting out a sigh. He turned his head towards me and pointed towards his cheek.

“That’s all you’re getting.”

I scoffed. “Um, I hate to inform you but,” I grabbed the sides of his face, forcing our lips together. He moaned with both surprise and pleasure as I licked at his bottom lip. “You left yourself wide open.” Sasuke smirked at me, wrapping his arms around my neck and pulling me in closer. He kissed my forehead, and then nuzzled his cheek against mine. I could feel the hot puffs of his breath against my neck.

“I’m just so happy.” I pushed a hand into his hair, cupping the back of his head. We embraced and he wrapped his arms around me tighter. His head dipped down to my shoulder, littering kisses against my skin. He huffed out a laugh. “I love you so much, even though you ruin everything with your inappropriate humor.” I suppressed a laugh but it still shook my form. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too.” I buried my face in his hair, taking a long breath in. He smelled spicy, soft wisps of cinnamon and something else, something incredibly masculine that carried the scent even hardier. “So much…”

I pulled him onto my lap and we continued to hold each other for a few more moments. It was incredibly intimate, something I really missed. I placed my head against Sasuke’s chest, and he put his face into my hair. I could feel the gentle puffs of his breath against my scalp. I moved my head and as if Sasuke could feel the mood shift, he met my lips.

He seemed to get more comfortable in my lap because of how he straddled me, weaving his hands into my hair. Sasuke held my head in place as we kissed. My arousal started to fan to life, Sasuke grinding his hips against me, warming up my engine. I moaned into his mouth and he slipped his tongue in, mapping my mouth for the second time tonight. I could feel his smirk against my lips when he moved his hips in a teasing way, so our cocks would just brush, giving me a little taste but not enough to be satisfied.

I reached over to the side table and fumbled through it for a couple seconds. Sai and I have had multiple lonely nights of couch fucking so I knew we had lube somewhere around. I broke my kiss with Sasuke so I could see what I was doing and he didn’t seem phased; he continued to mark and kiss my neck. I found the bottle, which literally was at the very back of the drawer and made me stretch to the point where I fell off the couch.

Sasuke watched as I coated my fingers in lube, his eyes looking blown out, mostly pupil from his own arousal. I shivered at the lecherous, disheveled way he was staring at my fingers. He licked his lip, a knowing smirk forming on his lips as I trailed my fingers down his back. He was muttering against the side of my mouth, pressing hot kisses every so often. “I want you so bad.” I slipped a finger inside him, and he jolted in my lap obviously not as ready as I thought. My bad. He started to kiss me again as I worked my magic on him. The kisses got incredibly messy as I added more fingers and he started to thrust back against my hand. He reached between us wiping the saliva from our mouths to wet his hand; he grabbed my cock, eyes shiny and black with his desire. My body shook with the sudden pleasure.

“Sasuke,” I muttered against the skin of his chest. I nuzzled him, getting impatient with my own preparations. He was starting to feel it too; his skin was heated, turning cherry red from the strain-he was obviously holding himself back. He pushed me back and pulled at my wrist. He was more than ready-maybe not physically but the desire makes you do stupid stuff. He was straddling me with no restraint or hesitation. And it was then that my evil plan came to fruition: Sasuke pulled my cock to his entrance, gently pressing himself onto it. Without any additional lube, it was a tight fit and I knew it would take more than a second for him to adjust. I held my hips back from snapping up into him. Sasuke pulled away from me and I grabbed the lube again, putting some on my cock where Sasuke wasn’t spreading himself on me.

“Good idea.” He muttered through somewhat clenched teeth. It was cold with just the lube on my cock and I helped coax him back down to the hilt, watching his face to make sure he was more than comfortable with our union. His head drooped forward as he started to thrust backwards, rolling his hips so that his ass was slapping against my thighs. The pace was slow but enough for me to feel the tickles of pleasure in the pit of my stomach. “Oh fuck…” He grunted, his hands exploring my body as he started to move faster. My eyelids fluttered as he sunk deep onto my cock, clenching really gently right at the base. He was rolling my nipples with his thumbs, really upping the ante.

I grabbed onto his hips, hard. I could feel my fingers finding a great deal of purchase in his skin-probably enough to give bruises-and started to match his pace. With our meetings becoming rough and the slaps getting louder and louder, Sasuke tossed his head back, obviously feeling the flowing pleasure. I moaned at the sight of him, sitting up so I could taste the skin of his stomach, kiss his nipples. “Naruto, more.” His fingers were tugging at my scalp whenever he got a particularly good thrust inside him. I felt even more drunk from the lust than I ever could from the booze. I moved such that Sasuke was facing back over the couch. I got behind him, standing on rather unstable cushions. I ‘hmm’ed to myself-this seemed a lot more sexy and a lot less dangerous in my head.

“Uh, Naruto.”

“Yeah….”

“I don’t really want to topple over the side of the couch to my death, if that’s okay with you.” Sasuke said, his legs straining from riding me. Couch cushions weren’t exactly ideal leverage material.

“You sure about that?”

“Do me against the coffee table?” Sasuke suggested. He looked up at me from over his shoulder, his face flushed. He was still panting slightly, obviously annoyed we had to stop for the logistics of the sex we were having and whether the risk-reward would be worth the carpet burn.

“I guess the coffee table is a little sexy. Kinda kinky, like maybe a seven out of ten.” Sasuke started laughing to himself as I moved from behind him so he could lay against the coffee table. I kinda of felt bad because I knew that table had to be cold; he shivered, seeming to appreciate when I closed the space between us.

“Your ride is here, Princess.” He cocked an eyebrow at me. “Sorry, I was gunna say it when you started to ride me and my evil plan came to fruition but I got super caught up in the moment.”

Sasuke blinked, shaking his head. “Naruto,”

“Yes?”

“Shut up and put your cock inside me.” He encouraged me by giving me a rather hard slap on the ass, like one would do to a horse when they wanted them to run. I smirked at Sasuke-he did appreciate the ride.

I spread his thighs quickly and pressed myself in without my adieu-he choked on some of the spit in his mouth when a loose moan slipped through his lips. “Like that?”

“Asshole,” he whined, but still wrapped his legs around me anyway, pulling me even closer. I barely had room to thrust-even though I appreciated how hot Sasuke felt from the inside-I couldn’t properly pleasure either of us if he was clinging this tight. I grabbed his thighs, pulling them apart and pushing them down towards the table. He moaned as I slipped in deep, his walls welcoming by clenching and releasing. I almost came just from how warm and tight he was but I rocked my jaw back and forth, trying to stave off my pleasure. He clawed at my back as I mercilessly pounded into him-the pain mixed in with my pleasure made me feel woozy and able to push back more of my orgasm as it tickled my gut.

He cried out, fingers curling into my hair as he arched up off the table. I slammed into him again and again, his moans drowning out how lewdly our skin was slapping together. He tugged at my head, pulling me into a bruising kiss-it felt violent with our unhindered passion. I could taste the faint tinge of blood, probably from where our lips crashed a little too hard. I swallowed up Sasuke’s moans, licking at the corners of his mouth and sucking at his neck when I could pry myself away from that greedy orifice.

Sasuke basically was folded in half beneath me-the look on his face told me he loved it-loved how deep I was inside him, how my cock filled him up the very brim while my weight held him down. “Oh god,” He moaned, slamming his head back against the coffee table. I almost stopped just because I didn’t want him to actually hurt himself or anything but he just grabbed onto my hips, helping to guide me deeper and deeper into his ass. “Ughn, fuck. I’m so close, fuck.” I gasped when I felt Sasuke sink his fingers into my ass, no warning, no nothing. He licked his lips and smirked cockily at me. “I want here too.” He sounded disoriented, completely sloshed with pleasure. I grabbed his cock with my free hand, holding the additional weight I was adding wouldn’t actually crush him. The closer I got to him, the easier it was for him to add another finger inside of me. He thrusted in time with me twirling my wrist and jerking him off. He choked on a moan; his now free knee was pressing into my hip and his foot locked around my leg, trying to draw me in deeper. It somewhat knocked me off balance causing Sasuke’s fingers to slip out of me.

He grunted in frustration and I felt somewhat empty without the second source of pleasure. I shook it off though, pinning Sasuke’s hands down as I continued to jerk him off. I refused to cum before him. I leaned in, attaching myself to his neck, sucking at the already marked skin I found there. My thrusts were getting more erratic and Sasuke choking on his moans and whimpers were starting to really get to me. He mumbled something, starting to really violently thrash underneath me. “Oh, yes!” He arched up and I slipped in one, last, good time, earning a spray of white from Sasuke. The pearly drops came spilling from the head of his heated cock in pulses that matched my own thrusts. I couldn’t stand the sight of it, the way he clenched around my cock and how the muscles insides rippled with the pulses of cum from Sasuke’s head.

I kept giving little thrusts as I came, his muscles were so tight around me I couldn’t even pull out properly. “Fuck…” I muttered, feeling myself go limp. My body felt like it was made of noodles. I tried not to crush Sasuke as the strength left me and made me feel like I was standing on Jell-O. He pulled me in for a lazy kiss, obviously feeling exhausted from his orgasm. Just the press of his lips against mine, the gentle way his tongue pushed in and wrapped around mine, had me feeling the arousal again. I was still inside him and he moaned softly at the feeling of my cock swelling.

I heard a ‘crunch’ come from the kitchen and I looked over to see Sai barely concealed by the pantry door he was trying to hide behind. I pulled out of Sasuke so fast that I fell straight on my ass in my scramble. “SAI, WHAT THE FUCK?” Sasuke turned his head briefly towards Sai, grabbing a paper in his reach and placing it over his modesty-I guess in his best attempt to cover up his nudity while still feeling like a jellyfish. No bones to support any further movement…

“Bitch, I live here too, remember? I wanted a snack but I didn’t want to interrupt your…reunion.” He said calmly. “So, not to be rude, I crab-walked from my room to the kitchen. And then I was treated to dinner and a show, curtesy of the two of you, thanks.” He placed another chip into his mouth, smiling at the two of us. “Also, you can have that couch and table when you move out.” Sai winked at me.

Cheeky asshole.

\--

 

My stomach rumbled while we drove down the snow-slicked roads of downtown. Sasuke had wanted to go on a date and since we were on winter break, it seemed like the perfect time. But part of me was really suspicious. Ever since we officially got back together, Sasuke hadn’t said a word about us getting married, which was completely opposite to his attitude he had when he first arrived. Not that I minded it. Planning a wedding sounded stressful.

We got out of the car and Sasuke immediately took my hand in his own. My fingers prinkled from the snow falling onto his gloves. Of course, he was ever practical with his outfit choice. I turned towards him and he stopped. I fixed the collar of his pea coat and pulled at the wrapping of his scarf, which he was totally using to cover up his hickies. What a hoe, right? I displayed that shit, let them know I got a hot ass man who punches people. Blessed with relationship goals.

I kissed him on the nose and he smirked. “If you wanna skip the date and go to a scary back alley to turn a couple tricks…” He trailed off and winked at me, making me laugh.

“Oh yeah, baby, I’ll slob all over that knob.” Sasuke laughed as I made the motion and noises. And that’s when I realized an older couple was walking by us, just staring in disbelief. I turned my head away from them, staring at Sasuke, who was still chuckling under his breath.

“Shit, why didn’t you tell me there were people around?”

“Dobe, in public.”

“You act like I know what that is.” I rolled my eyes and Sasuke grabbed at my hand again. “You’re being needy.” He clicked his tongue at me and I started to hum, innocently. He muttered something like ‘fucking rude’ under his breath before dragging me towards our destination.  

I looked up from the rain soaked side walk to the bulbous observation deck of the Space Needle. Sasuke cleared his throat and smiled at me. “Ready to go up?”

“You do realize that I’ve lived in Seattle for many a year now, and the Space Needle is not new to me.”

His eyes immediately narrowed, mouth thinning into a line. I started humming nonchalantly to myself, keenly aware I just ruined the whole mood of our date. “I will leave you stranded in downtown.” Sasuke said with an annoyed smile. Pfft, jokes on you Sasuke, UW gives you a bus pass; it’s included in your tuition, duh. I rolled my eyes as Sasuke buys our tickets to go up.

Sasuke jingled his keys at me. “I am the key lord, today, not you.” He said with a snort, heading to the kiosk to buy our tickets. “You will be left by me and all my glory.”   
  
“Uh, okay then I’d just call your brother and have a good time with him because he’d be the new key lord. We’d get dim sum without you.”   
  
“Oh, dim sum does sound good.”   
  
“Shut the fuck up.” I laughed, slapping my leg with a huge smile on my face. “See? I’m trying to help the team. If you’re the key lord and I’m king of suggestions.”   
  
“We’ll get dim sum…” Sasuke shoved my ticket into my hand, “After we go up, your majesty.” I rolled my eyes and followed him.  
  
Even though I’ve seen it many times and have traversed its heights, there’s something mystical about standing at the base of the Space Needle. And now was honestly the perfect time because it was just gently snowing so when you looked up, there were tiny little flecks of snow dropping in silence against the shimmer of glass and metal. Sasuke took my hand in his which startled me because his gloves were slightly damp against my bare skin.  
  
It was so weird to think people actually traveled to Washington to visit this place; it bogles my mind how things we see every day and think are mundane, attract others with careless finesse.   
  
We boarded, alone, surprisingly. The ride up wasn’t as smooth as you’d expect, but elevators aren’t exactly perfect. Plus, you go up so far that the wind can actually effect your ride; my stomach prickled with excitement and nervousness. You know, because you always have the worst-case scenario at the back of your mind…Where the elevator falls and you survive because you need to have that tragic ‘love-lost’ story to help with your already tragic, anime backstory…  
  
Sorry Sasuke…  
  
I laughed a little to myself.   
  
“What?”  
  
I turned my head slightly. “Oh nothing, I promise.”   
  
I stared out the glass and watched as everyone started to shrink and the buildings became eye level. Seattle was truly beautiful at night; when all the city lights were sprinkling the skylines with like stars. Even the blue and green Seahawks’ lights were a welcomed sight. The glass on the buildings twinkled as we ascended and different layers of light bounced off of them.   
  
What I loved the most was looking at the blend of modernism and the classical brick and mortar. Skeletons made of steel wrapped with glass skin next to strong holds of brick, red and rusty; the old blood of the city. But when you’ve seen a few a hundred or more times, you become bored of it. There are some subtleties you miss every time but once that information processes, your mind starts to wander around. That’s what it’s like when you step foot on UW’s campus: beautiful old buildings next to recently updates ones, wrapped in glass and lighting features.   
  
Sasuke cleared his throat to get my attention, but I didn’t turn around right away.   
  
“So, what do you think?”  
  
I scoffed. “Ohh, the Space Needle. I’m so impressed. I can see the EMP from here…” the motion of the elevator made me start to feel a little queasy especially when I looked down to the ground. Then a thought donned on me, cause Sasuke was being awfully quiet…and weird.   
  
“Sasuke, if I turn around and you’re proposing, I’m rejecting you.”  
  
I flipped around quickly to see Sasuke on his knee, ring out. “Damn it, Dobe.”  
  
“The Space Needle, dude? That's so cliché! Where’s the passion? The zing….you're face-timing your parents right now, aren't you?”   
  
Sasuke looked down at his phone. “No…?”  
  
_“I’m also here in case Otouto blew it.”_  
  
I started laughing as Sasuke fumbled to turn off his phone, getting paler from embarrassment. I walked over to him, leaning down to kiss him on the forehead. “I mean, it was sweet- the thought. But, not even close to the right place.”  
  
Sasuke rolled his eyes as I wrapped my arms around his neck, kissing him gently on the eyelids and he turned his head away, trying not to smile. “Where do you wanna go?”  
  
“Din Tai Fung, so I can get dim sum.”   
  
“First of all, I am not going all the way back to UW for dim sum. Secondly, not the right answer. I’ve been trying for to figure out where to propose to you for two months, give me a fucking hint.”  
  
“Fremont Troll.”  
  
“You’re kidding.”  
  
“Oh, I thought you wanted to get married…”  
  
Sasuke rolled his eyes. “Google a dim sum restaurant close by so we can have a full stomach when I have to drive all the way out to Fremont.”

\-----

Both Sasuke and I paused when we heard a muffled voice coming from nowhere. Sasuke reached into his pocket, grabbing his phone. “Oh thank god, the GPS is still on.”

“I mean, don’t discount the ghosts yet. You never know what could have happened here.”

“Naruto, we all know that troll is actually alive and waiting for us gays to walk by so it can eat us.”

“And gain all of our gay powers? Pfft, I fight for justice okay, I will punish that troll in the name of the moon.” I did Sailor Moon’s signature stance at Sasuke and he just looked at me, completely unamused. What a stick in the mud this guy was. And I said I was gunna marry him- lame. I might need to rethink my priorities in life. He was so lucky he was pretty…and had a good personality…and was really a great match for me…Bastard.

“You’ve been watching too much Sailor Moon.”

“Yo, if I’m Sailor Moon, you’re totally Tuxedo Mask. We are _relationship goals_.” I said excitedly, grabbing on his arm. Sasuke scoffed and shook his head, but he couldn’t hide his smile from me.

“Here,” He said slipping a piece of gum into my hand. “You stink like garlic and if you’re going to passionately kiss me, like I know you will, I do not want a mouth full of it.”

“So, you’re okay with me kissing you after I make your mountain erupt and have your lava covering all my crevices? But not okay with me tasting like delicious, delicious garlic-y dim sum?” I shook my head disapprovingly. “I think your priorities may be messed up.”

When he thought no one was looking he stuck his tongue out at me, “I taste great. I would frost a cake with my own jizz.” Another couple walked past us, eyes wide open and staring. The woman had her mouth slightly parted in disgust. I was holding my stomach, trying to keep the laughter contained. “Oh my god…”

“Sasuke, stop, I’m trying to walk over here.”

“If you say ‘no’ to my proposal after I embarrassed myself like that, I think I’m going to move to the most deserted area of Canada and start a snow farm.” I grabbed onto his hand and shook my head.

“Yeah, okay,” I snorted as he scoffed at me. “you say that shit every time and I still haven’t found myself knee deep in snow.”

We hopped off the sidewalk and went through the concrete barriers separating the road from the little alcove underneath the bridge. The Fremont Troll was an interesting…Art piece? Land mark? Mostly because it just seemed to so random. Like literally to get to the Fremont Troll, you had to drive down a residential area with some nice ass houses and it’s just like bam, troll holding a car-there ya go, have a nice day.

“I can’t believe this is where you want me to propose.”

“What’s wrong with here?” Sasuke just looked at me with an annoyed expression.

“’Is Nothing, just that against the skyline with all the beautiful Christmas lights and snow, the city looked super beautiful and you look all cute in your coat. And I just wanted it to be super romantic but instead we’re standing in front of a troll.” Sasuke replied with a shrug. He held the ring box in his hand and my eyes couldn’t leave it for a second. This was it.

“The most romantic place.” I corrected with a nod, smiling as Sasuke’s face revealed that he didn’t particularly care for my jab.

Sasuke got on one knee in front of me and I had to act all surprised like he didn’t blow his first and then also his second proposal to me. I mean, I wasn’t gunna say ‘no’ now, even though part of me wanted to say it just so I could get Sasuke’s goat. He slipped the ring on my finger and that’s when we heard someone scream. I threw my head to the side, giving her all my attention towards her because damn dude, I thought she was getting murdered or something. She excitedly came over to us, speaking like a mile and minute dude, and I put a hand on her shoulder. I remembered her from two quarters ago when she was in my 197 class. “Whoa, dude, calm down.”

“Sorry,” She smiled brightly at me. “I’m a really big sucker for super romantic stuff. And you’re just so cool in class and I’m so happy for you.” She grabbed my hands and I could see her eyes darting back between my face and my ring.

“Oh, well, could you take a picture for us then? Since ya know, everyone is gunna wanna see how good my hand looks with the rock.” Sasuke rolled his eyes and she excitedly took my phone from my hand.

“Okay, ready?” She asked, lining up my camera.

“Nope, just give us one second.” I turned towards Sasuke. “Too the top of the troll, Sasuke.” I clapped my hands at him and he just stared me in the face for a good couple seconds.

“You can’t be serious.”

“Do I look like I’m joking?”

Begrudgingly, Sasuke climbed up to the troll’s head with me taking the lead. I know this was probably a stupid thing to do because Sasuke probably just wanted to go home and ‘celebrate’ our new engagement, but I wanted a couple pictures, a few nice little memories just for me.

“Okay, now pick me up.”

“Naruto, I’m not going to do that.”

“Weak bitch.” I muttered, just to get Sasuke’s competitive spark going. He raised an eyebrow and shook his head.

“As if, I could easily bench press you.”

“Okay then, what’s the deal? Let me jump romantically into your arms.”

“I’m okay with not falling to my death from a troll’s head.”

“Boy, if you don’t let me jump into your arms-“

“Shut up, I’m going to fall if you do that.”

“Don’t be a pussy, Sasuke.” I leapt up and Sasuke managed to catch me, taking only a few steps back. Oh boy, I actually felt a little bit of fear when he stepped back. I legitimately thought we were going to fall for a second.

“Are you guys ready yet?” She stood with my phone at the base of the Fremont Troll and obviously made a maneuver to zoom-in. I gave her a thumbs up and kissed Sasuke on the cheek. I held my ring up for everyone to see and smiled as wide as I could.

Our life together was going to start here-where we could potentially die…From falling off the top of a troll. I laughed to myself and wiggled out of Sasuke’s arms. My heart was thumping hard from the adrenaline and Sasuke was smiling at me, the corners of his mouth showing from the top of his scarf. His eyes were shining as they watched mine and I could feel the heat in his gaze, the love and adoration in just a simple look.

I guess, sometimes, people really do make good on their promises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I may or may not start writing drabbles for this universe. They would be post-proposal much like the bonus for the last chapter was. And that literally means it could include anything so...be on the lookout for anything related, I will probably post briefly on this story first to give everyone the notification that I've written more for the universe.


	8. THE SEQUEL ANNOUNCEMENT: BONDS

Hey guys, i figured updating this would be the best way to reach out and let everyone know that I will be making a somewhat sequel/series of drabbles for this universe. For some reason this story has been stuck in my head for a really long time. A big reason why is that: its relatively short-most of the stuff i write is twice as long if not a few chapters longer than this. But its difficult to really explore a lot of emotional complexities when a relationship is already established because it's not like they're figuring each other out and the attraction between them, it was already there-for the most part, they knew how the other one felt. And i guess you can say that it was obvious they were gunna get together just because of the genre and the comedy. Its a pretty traditional format.   
Anyway, i've decided to pick up my laptop again and start right for the universe. I think i kinda found my niche for Sasuke/Naruto interactions-they're a lot more light hearted than you would expect considering their usual AU personalities.   
ALSO NO ONE TO MY KNOWLEDGE HAS STARTED A SAI BLOG AND THAT IS NOT A WORLD I WANNA LIVE IN. If i was talented at art at all, I would have made that blog months ago and linked it to this profile but noooo, i didn't get the art skills. obviously, i gotta inspire someone with skill to do my dirty work and make a Sai stalks and draws Naruto and Sasuke's new life.  
It'll be called BONDS-i know, how cliche, but still very fitting. Of course, I will acknowledge it will be mostly drabbles with some kind of plot thrown in. I'm not sure how heavy of a plot it will be or if it'll mostly be Sasuke and Naruto being cute together while Sai and Itachi bother them.   
I'll see you in the sequel

Ciao,   
H-sama


End file.
